Testy Area 51 (3 Viewers)

[Elizabeth S]

Anyone seen Wind River yet?

My brother lives in the middle of the real Wind River reservation. What a horrible crime-ridden place it is. My brother is NUTS.

I saw this this past weekend. Really good movie! Jeremy Renner is made for this type of outdoorsy role. Elizabeth Olsen is always excellent. The quiet understated scenes are really offset by a couple of very tense ones.

One of the rare occasions where some audience members applauded at the conclusion.

 

[Walter Kittel]

Standing on the balcony watching the night sky to the East. Seeing the entire eastern skyline lit up with lightning. (I live on the SW side of the Houston, TX. area.) Pretty amazing seeing multiple flashes in a sub-second period and then immediately repeating. There must be thousands, maybe tens of thousands of lightning flashes over the entire central and southern Houston area. The band producing the flashes moved over me earlier this evening but fortunately only persisted for about one hour in my part of town.

Fair amount of tornado activity, both to the East and the West of me, so far. Got about 3 or 4 more days of this mess to set through. So far, so good.

- Walter.

 

[Mike Frezon]

Godspeed, Walter.

I can't believe some of the video I'm seeing coming out of TX the past couple of days.

 

[Mike Frezon]

[rant]What the hell...[/rant]

15 years...and one day...ago.

 

[Mike Frezon]

 

[Mike Frezon]

• 1 mango
• 12 oranges
• 6 bananas

Hey I'm posting here... I'm posting here....
worst.color.ever
Verdana baby....
Here be dragons

'Tis the stuff of legend.

=======================

On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night.

There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself
'This could be heaven or this could be Hell'
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say

Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year (any time of year) you can find it here

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes bends
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget

So I called up the Captain,
'Please bring me my wine'
He said, 'we haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty-nine'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say"

Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
They livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise), bring your alibis

Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said, 'we are all just prisoners here, of our own device'
And in the master's chambers,
They gathered for the feast
They stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can't kill the beast

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
'Relax' said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!'

 

[Ruz-El]

Yeash

 

[Steve Christou]

I knew it was coming up and completely forgot about it. 15 years! Wow! We were kids when this thread first started, mad internet kids, this was our playground. Thanks to Parker Clack. I started this thread but he helped keep it going back then. Anyone else would have shut us down eventually. Hail to the Chief!

Many thanks to all the testy droogs past, present and no longer with us, super mods like Mike Frezon, Cees Alons and Jack Briggs who have kept this thread afloat over the years. Cheers guys, and girls!

 

[Ruz-El]

I wasn't even born!

 

[Dennis Nicholls]

That was long before I met my first Idaho gals.

 

[Dennis Nicholls]

By the way, they keep inventing new domain extensions. The latest one is ".wine". I had lunch at this place on Sunday with the Miata club.
www.parmaridge.wine .

 

[Dennis Nicholls]

This Roosevelt....what kind of rifle does he use?

 

[Mike Frezon]

Long may it wave.

 

[Mike Frezon]

 

[Steve Christou]

ABSENTEE : A missing golfing accessory.
ACOUSTIC : An instrument in shooting pool.
ACCRUE : People who work on a ship.
ADORABLE : What you ring when you go visiting.
ALARMS : What an octopus is.
ANTISOCIAL : Mother's sister being friendly.
ATLAS : Finally
AUSTRALIAN KISS : Same as French Kiss, ... only down under!
AVOIDABLE : What a bullfighter tries to do.
BOYCOTT : His crib.... not hers !
BROADBAND : An all girl musical group.
CARNATION : Country where everybody has a four wheeler.
CLIMATE : The only thing you can do with a ladder.
CROWBAR: Where birds can get a drink
DAMNATION : Beaver country
DARE : Not here.
DEBUT : De part of de body you must park to be seated.
DECAGON : De way you explain how your vehicle was a total washout in an accident.
DECAY : De letter which comes after de J.
ECLIPSE : What an English barber does for a living.
FINITE : Sir Lancelot.
FOBIA : The fear of misspelled words
GRAPE : Great Ape.
HANGING : A suspended sentence.
HEROES : What a guy in a boat does.
HUMBUG : A singing cockroach
ILLEGAL : A sick bird
INFORMATION : How ducks are supposed to fly !
INTENSE : Where campers sleep !
MUCUS : A cat swear word.
MUNCHKIN : What cannibals do to relatives
PARADOX : Two physicians.
PECAN : A container to urinate in.
POLYGON : Who left the cage door open?
PRIMATE : The sultan's favorite wife
RECOUNT : Honorary Title reaffirmed by Floridans.
RELIEF : What trees do in the spring.
RENDER : The Animals that draw Santa's carriage.
SELFISH : What the owner of a seafood store does.
URINE : Opposite of "you're out" !
YANKEE : The same as a quickie, ...but you can do it by yourself!
ZEBRA : Ze cloth which covers ze breasts!

 

[Walter Kittel]

Managed to catch a few patches of blue sky just awhile ago. A fairly marked change from Saturday evening's experience. I have to wonder what the coming weeks and months will hold. (Not personally; as I wasn't impacted, but for the area.)

- Walter.

 

[Parker Clack]

I lived through many flood in Houston. Never fun at all. My heart goes out to all
of those families having to go through all this.

Fart: F'n Art
Money: More than one knee.
Abilify: A bill you send a fly.
Youtube: A place you can tube. And only you.

Hal: Daisy!
Dave: You singing that damn song again?
Hal: Just practicing.
Dave: Get me the damn screw driver.

Nancy: Oh...Nick. Nick. Are you alright?
Nick: Yeah.....
Nancy: Then quit slapping me.

There was something fishy about the butler.
He was probably a Pieces working for scale.

(fog horn)

ANNOUNCER

Los Angeles... He walks again by night...

NICK

(whistles)

ANNOUNCER

Out of the fog, into the smog...

NICK

(cough, cough)

ANNOUNCER

Relentlessly... ruthlessly...

NICK

I wonder where Ruth is?

ANNOUNCER

…doggedly… (bark bark)

NICK

Eh, get away from me…

ANNOUNCER

... towards his weekly meeting with... the unknown. At 4th and Drucker
he turns left, at Drucker and 4th he turns right, he crosses MacArthur Park
and walks into a great sandstone building. (smack)

NICK

Oh, my nose!

ANNOUNCER

Groping for the door he steps inside... (door opens/closes) (phone rings
until pick up) (13 steps) climbs the 13 steps to his office, he walks in
(walking/door opens)... he's ready for mystery, (door closes/walking)
he's ready for excitement... he's ready for anything, he's...

NICK

(ends whistling) (pick up phone/one more ring) Nick Danger, Third Eye...


VOICE

(phone voice) I, uh, wanna order a pizza to go and no anchovies...

NICK

No anchovies? You've got the wrong man, I spell my name...Danger. (phone hangup)

VOICE

(phone voice) What?

ANNOUNCER

(organ) The makers of Fantastic Cigarettes, long in the leaf and short in the can, bring
you another true story from the tattered casebook of Nick Danger, Third Eye.
Let's join him now in the adventure we call... Cut ‘em Off at the Past! (organ fwah)

NICK

Let's get down to business. (walk) Uncross those beautiful stems of yours, baby,
here's the case I call number 666. It all began innocently enough on Tuesday.
I was sitting in my office on that drizzly afternoon listening to the monotonous
staccato of rain on my desktop and reading my name on the glass of my office door.
"Regnad Kcin". My secretary lay snoring on the floor (snores) her long, beautiful gams
pinioned under the couch. I didn't hear him enter, (creaky door/walking) but my nostrils
flared at the smell of his perfume... Pyramid Patchouli. There was only one joker in
L.A. sensitive enough to wear that scent and I had to find out who he was.

ROCKY

Good afternoon, Mr.... Danger. I'm Rocky Rococo.

NICK

Thanks half-pint. You just saved me a lot of investigative work.

 

[Steve Christou]

Daisy... Daisy....

How many years have I had Dave and Hal in my signature? Jeezus. And why is it in German? I remember my first signature quote (for 2 or 3 years) was from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and here is exactly how it looked -

DENNIS: Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
ARTHUR: Be quiet!
DENNIS: Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
ARTHUR: Shut up!
DENNIS: I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!

A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side.
He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons.
"I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside.
Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute.
He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my genitals unscathed.
In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."
The crowd murmured their approval.
The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers,
and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth.
The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped.
After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head.
The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.
The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks were delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer.
"I'll pay anyone $100, who's willing to give it a try?".
A hush fell over the crowd.
After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A woman timidly spoke up.
"I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle".

 

[Dennis Nicholls]

Live long and prosper, Testy!

 

[Parker Clack]

Hal : stoppen sie Dave...
Hal: step on sie Dave..
Hal: stomp on sie Dave...

Hal: Ich mag den Dave am besten.