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Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by Scott Weinberg, Jun 12, 2002.
I came across this piece at Chud.com who snagged the news from Starlog magzine:
dinosaurs... in... space!
Dinosaurs take over the Earth and become a dominant life form again--then 30 million years into the future, some velociraptor-descended archaelogist encounters the Statue of Liberty eroding out of the ground on a beach somewhere....
"YOU DAMN DIRTY REPTILES!"
sorry had to do it
This is a job for Dastardly & Muttley... "Catch the Archeopteryx, Catch the Archeopteryx, Catch that Archeopteryx NOW!!!" Or, Jaws 5: This Time Its A Plesiosaur.
I would not mind another Jurassic. PLEASE have more of the T-Rex in the fourth one!! He was the true star of the first 2 movies but was missing from part 3!!! One small cameo does not cut it.
Let's hope JP4 is not a "no-brainer."
You'd think by now they'd feel they can afford to make a JP movie with a plot and dialogue. Perhaps a more scientific and brainy film that even explains a few things rather than interrupting the slightest charcter exchange with another chase.
After crash landing on the island in a Boeing 767 the remaining survivors substitute the jets battery with a battery from a Sony Handycam
In Jurassic Park IV, the Spinosaurus thinks it has conquered all and is King of the Planet, until it encounters a human stranger one day. Rather than eat the stranger, the dino is convinced to take a red pill provided by the stranger. Upon taking it, the dino realizes it has been living inside of a 65-Million year old computer simulation, and must now try to destroy the system and free all the dino-slaves... ...nah!
Jurassic Park IV: The Revenge of Barney or Jurassic Park IV: Barney Strikes Back A good story, with both Grant and Malcom, might work.
The movie takes place 10 million years in the future; dinsoaurs take over the earth, but some humans had escaped the planet... Sentient hominid reptiles around the earth are startled when huge, 25-mile-diameter spaceships start appearing over their major cities. All of their feeble attempts at communicating with the aliens fail, and eventually are met with hostile fire, just as each ship opens up and sends down a huge green charge that blows up each city the ship hovers over... Meanwhile, a few brave and daring reptiles with little training and nothing in common come together to try and fight the aliens. They eventually capture one -- a Rastafarian "human" with really long dreadlocks -- and, after analyzing it back at their base, are nearly overwhelmed with some kind of mental blast, but in that moment they realize the "humans" will not stop until they've wiped out every living reptile on the planet and take it over... In a final fit of despair, the clever reptile of the ragtag group suddenly has a moment inspiration, and with the help of the rest of his team is able to put his idea into action: They create a computer virus and upload it to the mother ship (whose leader looks like a bald version of Jeff Goldblum...) and set it off, destroying every last human invader and restoring peace to the planet. When asked about the virus idea, the clever reptile said, "Well, being a cable installer I know more information than any of you guys, so I already knew that these humans were once the rulers of this planet, and during their reign here they used computers like us with operating systems like ours. I figured, after millions of years of advancement, they'd still be using Windows."
It will include mating rituals on a doomed ship.
How about this: T-Rex is cloned to make a grand army of the republic and sent to Afghanistan. OR T-Rex is bitten by a genetically altered spider and becomes Spider-Rex!
I guess I better watch Part III sometime.
Smokey and the Brachi
A bunch of truckers have to ship a crate of dinosaurs and some Coors in a 24-hour run from the Deep South all the way to Texas.
The Diplodocus of Hazzard
A lean, long-necked hussy named Daisy the Diplodocus helps her two cousins fend off some pesky local law enforcement at Hazzard County.
First one was good, second had some potential. 3rd. I have a lot of mixed feelings. I mean come on, there had to be someone on the set that said "um that is really stupid, and everyone is going to think that when they see the movie". I can barely hear my cell phone ring in my pocket, can your really hear a sat phone ring inside the belly of a Trex, 100 yards away, and not hear him come walking up. The rest of the movie the subs are shaking the house from him walking, but not then. And that 10 year old would not have survived that long, let alone learn how to combat some raptors with a magic gas. Oh and raptors would eat you, then look for the eggs (if they really were searching for eggs...), not sit around and try to find their translator to get their message across. If the 4th is anything like the 3rd or 2nd then no thanks. Yes I own the DVD's. Sometimes I will just turn off the 3rd because something happens that I think is stupid.
I hope the new one has a better story than the "my son got lost on your island, will you help me?" crap.