What are the rules... (1 Viewer)

[Jared_B]

...for calling someone after you get their number?
Don't call for 48 hours, 3 days, one day, etc?
I generally don't even bother with "the rules", but I don't want to screw this up either.

(already asked her to dinner, she said yes, exchanged numbers, and the purpose of the call will be to setup the dinner date)

 

[Jack Briggs]

It's covered in the phone-manners chapter of the Official How To Court a Woman Rule Book, Jared. Just look it up under the subsections of the official telephone guidelines (forget which chapter and code). This information may be on the Internet as well.

 

[SteveA]

Always let one weekend pass before making "the call".

 

[Andrew W]

You don't have a date unless you have already agreed on a time. (such as Friday night.) You only have "consent to call and ask out to dinner sometime." If you already really have a date, call a few days prior to finalize arrangements for where and when you will pick her up. If you don't really have a date, you should call four or five days before you would like to go out. Ask her to go out on a specific night and if she says yes, ask, "Can I pick you up at 7:00?" Don't get all wishy washy and ask where she would like to go. Have a nice place in mind and a backup of a different type. Ask if she likes that type of food (Italian, Chinese, whatever...) If she doesn't like Italian, say what about Chinese. If you have to go down a long list, she is too picky, lose her.

 

[Micheal]

There are no rules. Call her when the mood hits you, follow your heart.

 

[Paul Bond]

Rules? We don' got no rules! We don' need......

No wait! I'LL GIVE YOU RULES!!!!!

Okay you've asked her out and she said yes. Good start. Now you need to set up the actual event. Let's say you want to go out next Friday.

1) Never call on Monday! It's right after the weekend and
it gives the impression you are desperate.
2) Usually call on Tuesday. It gives you both 3 days to
get ready, pick the right clothes, take a shower,
think about it, get excited/nervous/frightened/?
3) Don't call on Wednesday unless you've already been on a
few dates. When you call on a Wednesday, it gives the
impression that you don't figure she'll have any plans,
so why rush the invite. She might say yes, but she
won't be impressed with your timing.
4) Do NOT call on Thursday unless you are going steady (or
whatever the catchword is these days). Calling for a
date on Thursday means "I'm a loser, and I think you
are one to". If you are going steady, then a Thursday
call is just to determine what you are going to do, it
is already predetermined that you ARE going to do some-
thing.
5) Don't call on Friday, even if you ARE going steady. If
you aren't going steady, go back and read Thursday and
square the effect - several times. MAJOR LOSER!!! If
you are going steady, then just show up with a plan and
do it. Odds are she will be pleased that you are such
a take-charge kind of guy.
6) It is okay to call on the weekend during the day, but
just to say hi. You might call around 1-ish in the
afternoon to chat, learn a bit about each other outside
the actual date. If she mentions lunch or something
like going to the bookstore or the mall, then you can
ask if she would like some company. She's already
opened the door by mentioning those things, so step on
in. If the afternoon grows late, and she hasn't made
any noises about having to get home or get ready or
having something to do, then it's time to wing it. "I
don't have any plans tonight, and while I can't believe
you don't have any, if you really don't, then would you
like to go ahead and do something together? It can be
a rehearsal for our real date next week."

There!! Rules!!! Happy now?

 

[Kevin M]

Do not talk about Fight Club!

 

[Kris McLaughlin]

Where's Doug Liman when you need him?

 

[Christ Reynolds]

so when are you going to call your babies?

six days

 

[Jared_B]

UPDATE:
I initially got her number last Thursday, and finally called her on Sunday. Not because I wanted to follow any rule, but simply because I was really busy most of the weekend. So I left a voicemail, and haven't heard back yet. Methinks she's following the "3 day" rule herself!

 

[Vince Maskeeper]

Run away! Anyone who buys into those rules games is a nutcase.

Wait, I guess you were also trying to play the same games- so maybe you're perfect for one another.



Vince

 

[MarkHastings]

(212) 123-4567

Subtract the sum of the seven digit phone number from the area code:
212 - 28 (i.e. 1+2+3+4+5+6+7) = 184

This will give the number of hours:
184 / 24 = 7.66 days

 

[Aurel Savin]

I knew Vice would jupmin with some proper wisdom ... do any of you read the archived "relationship" threads (well at least soemone should archive them)

There are no rules. Call her when the mood hits you, follow your heart

Yes ... this is the correct answer.

 

[Zen Butler]

This style of thread pops up time to time. Jared, you don't need advice, just be yourself and call her when you have time. Something will either surface or not. These so called rules,dont's and advice are usually comprised by single men who either write for crappy Men's magazines or some bozo who has watched Swingers way too many times.

Official How To Court a Woman Rule Book

I was forced to read this in college. Really opened some doors for me.

 

[James_S]

MarkHastings

Like It.

 

[Danny R]

On a side note, the topic for the radio DJ's this morning was what to do in the following situation.

A woman gave a guy her number back at a Halloween party. She obviously thought him interesting enough to do so at the time.

He calls her this week and invites her to a Bruce Springstein concert on Friday.

She can't even remember what he looks like, or even what costume he wore way back when.

--

The general concensus was that waiting four months prior to calling isn't acceptable... UNLESS you have tickets to a big name event to back you up.

 

[Lee L]

Mark,

Your scheme doesn't work too well down here in the 919 area code.


Good thing I am already married.

 

[MarkHastings]

Lee, it works fine. 212 is in New York where things move faster than the south.

 

[Chris PC]

If you're just after sex then the time you call may have an affect on what happens. If you are genuinely interested in someone, I don't think it matters that much when you call. If calling too early turns someone off, then that doesn't say much about the person.

 

[Jared_B]

A nice seqway into the maturity topic:
I think I was rejected. Called back, and this time instead of voicemail, she (I think) answers, but my cell phone breaks up. I call right back, and some guy answers and says she doesn't live/stay there anymore.

Nothing pisses me off more than people who aren't honest, and act immature about things like this. If she wasn't interested, she needs to say so. My feelings will not be hurt, because I've said this to other people before. The way I look at it is, I'm saving them time by not leading them on. I'll be honest up front. What makes me mad is this girl didn't have the dignity to tell me up front that she wasn't interested, and now it seems she doesn't even have the maturity to answer my call and tell me the same.

Sorry for the rant, but immaturity, dishonesty and/or being misleading are my biggest pet-peeves. I guess being a bit angry is probably natural in this situation, but I've been rejected before and not thought much of it.

This calls for a trip to the shooting range.