MikeEckman
Screenwriter
- Joined
- Jan 11, 2001
- Messages
- 1,085
In light of some of the less than popular announcements made by Warner Bros lately, and MGMs recent announcement that people prefer full frame movies, and no audio commentaries, heres an actual transcript of an actual consumer study done at a local mall somewhere in the USA, in which MGM and Warner Bros were present trying to determine how they felt about the state of DVD. This transcript was found on another HT board and is courtesy of Jason Yeiter:
(Mall setting)
MGM representative: Hello, sir.
Man: Howdy!
MGM R: Would you and your family consider yourself average consumers?
Man: We done good as anyone else. Ya hear?
MGM R: Well sir, what aspect ratios do you and your family perfer.
Man: Uh...duh....uh....
MGM R: Do you like widescreen or pan and scan better?
Man: We like the third one.
MGM R: There is no third one....
Man: Then what ever one gives me more...the second one....the man and stan.
MGM R: Uh...you mean pan and scan.
Man: Whatever you say, buddy.
MGM R: Moving on....do you like extras? How about audio commentaries
Man: I don't know what that is but it sounds funny. Nah....
MGM R: What about documentaries?
Man: What's that? Uh...no....
MGM R: What about cheap, useless, 8-page booklets.
Man: Booklets are great. We all like em lots.
MGM R: What about theatrical trailers?
Man: You give out trailers to bring to the movies? Yes, sir...we needs them.
MGM R: O.K....thank you for your help...this will help with our upcoming dvd releases.
Man: What in tarnation is a dvd? That somethin' you sell or is it a disease?
MGM R: Good-bye, sir.
Man: If y'all want to talk to someone else...there that fella sittin' down over there.
MGM R: I'm afraid he's busy with that Warner Brothers representative.
(over a short ways away)
Warner Brothers Representative: ....so you think we should put more 'best of' dvd's and NOT do any entire season releases like Fox?
Old Drunk Man: I don't care what you do, Suzy B...just give me one more drinks.
WB R: No more drinks until I get an answer from you...the average consumer....
ODM: Do the 'best of' for your 8-track tapes...now give me my hooch!
WB R: You mean dvd.
ODM: Huh?
WB R: What about aspect ratios?
ODM: Don't be usin' none of that gutter talk around me feller. You go speak dirty to a lady and leave me with my drink...
WB R: Do you perfer widescreen or pan and scan.
ODM: If I gotta' a lady, I wanna' her not be widescreen but scan and pan...
WB R: What about Willy Wonka?
ODM: I told you to keep that gutter talk to yourself.
WB R: What about Cat and Dogs?
ODM: What? It's rainin' again?
WB R: How do you feel about extras?
ODM: Don't care...long as she scan and pan.
WB R: How do you feel about a Batman re-release?
ODM: Ratmen should be left in the sewers!
WB R: Thank you for your help in pointing out average consumer interests....
ODM: Get outta' here, Billy Bob Warner...
(Mall setting)
MGM representative: Hello, sir.
Man: Howdy!
MGM R: Would you and your family consider yourself average consumers?
Man: We done good as anyone else. Ya hear?
MGM R: Well sir, what aspect ratios do you and your family perfer.
Man: Uh...duh....uh....
MGM R: Do you like widescreen or pan and scan better?
Man: We like the third one.
MGM R: There is no third one....
Man: Then what ever one gives me more...the second one....the man and stan.
MGM R: Uh...you mean pan and scan.
Man: Whatever you say, buddy.
MGM R: Moving on....do you like extras? How about audio commentaries
Man: I don't know what that is but it sounds funny. Nah....
MGM R: What about documentaries?
Man: What's that? Uh...no....
MGM R: What about cheap, useless, 8-page booklets.
Man: Booklets are great. We all like em lots.
MGM R: What about theatrical trailers?
Man: You give out trailers to bring to the movies? Yes, sir...we needs them.
MGM R: O.K....thank you for your help...this will help with our upcoming dvd releases.
Man: What in tarnation is a dvd? That somethin' you sell or is it a disease?
MGM R: Good-bye, sir.
Man: If y'all want to talk to someone else...there that fella sittin' down over there.
MGM R: I'm afraid he's busy with that Warner Brothers representative.
(over a short ways away)
Warner Brothers Representative: ....so you think we should put more 'best of' dvd's and NOT do any entire season releases like Fox?
Old Drunk Man: I don't care what you do, Suzy B...just give me one more drinks.
WB R: No more drinks until I get an answer from you...the average consumer....
ODM: Do the 'best of' for your 8-track tapes...now give me my hooch!
WB R: You mean dvd.
ODM: Huh?
WB R: What about aspect ratios?
ODM: Don't be usin' none of that gutter talk around me feller. You go speak dirty to a lady and leave me with my drink...
WB R: Do you perfer widescreen or pan and scan.
ODM: If I gotta' a lady, I wanna' her not be widescreen but scan and pan...
WB R: What about Willy Wonka?
ODM: I told you to keep that gutter talk to yourself.
WB R: What about Cat and Dogs?
ODM: What? It's rainin' again?
WB R: How do you feel about extras?
ODM: Don't care...long as she scan and pan.
WB R: How do you feel about a Batman re-release?
ODM: Ratmen should be left in the sewers!
WB R: Thank you for your help in pointing out average consumer interests....
ODM: Get outta' here, Billy Bob Warner...