Disease Control Alert from Atlanta (1 Viewer)

[David McGough]

The Centers for Disease Control & Prevention in Atlanta has released a list of symptoms of bird flu. If you experience any of the following, please seek medical treatment immediately:



1. High fever

2. Congestion

3. Nausea

4. Fatigue

5. Aching in the joints

6. An irresistible urge to shit on someone's windshield

 

[Lynda-Marie]

 

[ChristopherDAC]

Seriously, isn't it wonderful how all these diseases have the same description? Bird flu, Hantavirus, Ebola, SARS, Anthrax: "vague flu-like symptoms" followed within 56 hours by DEATH. That's all they ever say. First you have vague flu-like symptoms, then you die. That's real helpful from a diagnostic standpoint!
"Oh gee honey, I think I'll stay home from work today, I've been having vague flu-like... Aack!"
"Hank! Hank, speak to me! Hello, Coroner's Office?"

 

[ZacharyTait]

I'm not suffering from 1-5, but I do suffer from 6 on a daily basis.