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Home Theater rules


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8 replies to this topic

#1 of 9 OFFLINE   Oliver Kopp

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Posted August 12 2001 - 12:57 PM

I was going through some old files on my harddrive today and found a thread with Fight Club inspired Hometheaterrules from early last year. The following are the 20 best of them. Enjoy and feel free to add some more Posted Image

You do not ask to have the volume turned down

You DO NOT ask to have the volume turned down

If you try to take my chair, you HAVE to fight

You DO NOT say "I can't see the difference between DVD and VHS"

You DO NOT discuss the movie during the movie

If you ask about the black bars on the picture, you will be escorted out

Shirts & Shoes stay on. Unless you are female and you are attractive

It is not too hot or too cold, it's perfect

Don't ask if the lights can be turned on

You DO NOT touch the remote, you do not look at the remote, the volume down button does not exist on the remote

You will have all snacks and beverages in hand BEFORE the movie starts

Did you know urine is sterile and you can drink it?

You DO NOT ask why the chairs are all vibrating

You DO NOT talk about the layer change!

You DO NOT ask why you can't record movies on DVD's

You DO NOT ask why Star Wars is not on DVD

You DO NOT ask how much money i've invested in this thing

You DO NOT ask why I have so many DVDs

You DO NOT comment on the side change on LD movies

You DO NOT complain when I have to get up and switch discs for longer LD movies

#2 of 9 OFFLINE   Dominik Droscher

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Posted August 12 2001 - 01:33 PM

hehe, classic Posted Image

#3 of 9 OFFLINE   Matthew Chmiel

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Posted August 12 2001 - 01:50 PM

I remember that thread... oh, the memories. Posted Image

Now where's that picture of Ron and Mr. Knapp? Posted Image

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[Edited last by Matthew Chmiel on August 12, 2001 at 04:50 PM]

#4 of 9 OFFLINE   bryan knott

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Posted August 12 2001 - 02:28 PM

My wife read that with me & I said that it must have been written with her in mind. Posted Image

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#5 of 9 OFFLINE   Steve Christou

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Posted August 12 2001 - 04:22 PM

You DO NOT touch my DVDs ever. You DO NOT use my Showgirls DVD as a frisbee. You DO NOT use my Showgirls DVD as a coaster. You DO NOT use my Showgirls DVD as an ashtray. You DO NOT touch my DVDs ever, I mean it! You DO NOT question why I rewind certain scenes. You DO NOT question why I freeze-frame certain scenes. You DO NOT question why I zoom into certain scenes. You DO NOT question why I'm wearing a toga while watching certain films. You DO NOT question why I'm naked while watching certain films. You DO NOT question why I have my tongue in your ear while watching certain films. You DO NOT smash me over the head with your shoe because of my stupid HT rules. You DO NOT puff smoke over my unconscious body. You DO NOT rest your feet over my unconscious body while watching TV. You DO NOT let the cat sleep on my still dormant body while watching tv. You DO NOT go to bed and leave me lying there on the carpet.

Dave hören... auf, wille stoppen sie Dave... stoppen sie Dave... Mein gehirn geht... Ich bin gefühl es... Ich bin gefühl es... Ich bin ängstlich Dave... Guter Nachmittag. Ich bin ein HAL 9000 computer. Ich wurde funktionsfähig am HAL-Betrieb in Urbana, Illinois auf January 12 1992.


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#6 of 9 OFFLINE   Ryan Wright

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Posted August 13 2001 - 09:32 AM

[quote]

You DO NOT question why I have my tongue in your ear while watching certain films.

[quote]

Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image ...and another HTF post causes me to laugh out loud. This Monday is getting better already.


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#7 of 9 OFFLINE   MichaelPe

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Posted August 13 2001 - 12:31 PM

[quote]

Now where's that picture of Ron and Mr. Knapp?

[quote]

Oh yeah... Posted Image
Posted Image

#8 of 9 OFFLINE   Sebastian_M

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Posted August 13 2001 - 04:19 PM

Posted Image Posted Image

I remember when that picture was originally posted! That's still really great.

Steve, I think you forgot a few rules regarding your coveted "Showgirls" DVD. Posted Image

Seb

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#9 of 9 OFFLINE   Kevin Fox

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Posted September 04 2001 - 08:53 PM

I suppose it's too late to ask that the original thread be placed in the archive. I couldn't find it in a search. I know a lot of people who weren't members of the HTF then would love to see it now.

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