Another post about meeting women... (1 Viewer)

[Scott Strang]

Patrick Sun sez

What about having business cards printed up with all of your wonderful traits, and hobbies/interest, with phone number and email address on them.

I went to school with a guy that did that very thing and he got many dates with good-looking women. I think it's a cool idea.

 

[Scott Strang]

But I've got a cool scar that women love!

I've got a scar on my leg from my chainsaw. Do you think women might like that?

 

[Kurt B]

Scott said:

Now that is one of the best, most positive statements I've ever seen. The way you crafted that statement was brilliant.

Thanks Tis something I try to live by in all things. I learned this long long ago when I worked in Networking sales.
Kurt

 

[andrew_werdna]

chicks are natural-born goofballs, so you have to keep it fun and light, and be effortless about it. if you don't know what to talk about, see what "friends" talks about, and start from there. don't go deeply into your hobbies, even if she claims interest in it. you gotta be the person you want to attract...so if you're not into fat chicks, you can't be fat yourself. you might want to consider joining a gym if she turns you down, 'cause one can never be too fit/sexy.

 

[Rob_J]

Has anyone ever had success with meeting and developing a romantic relationship with women at a gym? From what I've seen, women at the gym are usually on a "mission" and don't really like to be bothered when they work out. Plus add the fact that they're probably tired, slightly cranky and sweaty, I'm thinking they're not going to be in the mood for stuff like this.

 

[Chris Derby]

I'm going to laugh my ass off one of these days when somebody posts "I met this girl at blah, blah, blah... what do I do?" and the girl happens to hang out at the HTF and replies to the thread!
OK, now that I've said that:
1: If she is talking to you, and its not just normal smalltalk, shes interested. In the very least, shes not disinterested. Don't be nervous about asking her out. Besides, you have stuff in common.
2: I do the business card thing... It works. I don't use my business business card, either. Just a simple one that has my name, number, and email address on it.
3: The gym is usually one of the places that I behave myself. Very rarely will I make the 1st move at the gym. However, if there is eye contact and she looks like she wants you to talk to her, you've got nothing to lose, right?
Dangit, there was something else, too... Oh well, I'll think of it later. Good luck!!

 

[Derek Miner]

I'm going to laugh my ass off one of these days when somebody posts "I met this girl at blah, blah, blah... what do I do?" and the girl happens to hang out at the HTF and replies to the thread!

Yeah, I thought about that when writing my first post, hence the vague wording. Of course, if she were here and she read my second post, the situation I described would completely give me away.
That being the case, I guess I will share this... I decided I had to find out more about this woman because in addition to having action figures of Jay & Silent Bob, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Ash, she has actually seen (and, based on her comment, liked) Free Enterprise.
In fact, I find this whole thing ironic because in that movie, one of the characters meets a stunningly beautiful woman in Golden Apple Comics and she actually converses knowledgably about comics and laserdiscs. Many a laugh has been shared among my friends about how incredibly unrealisitc this scenario was... until I actually heard this cashier at Suncoast talking about her action figures.
Of course, this all was a riff off the stuff I was purchasing, so she could just be incredibly good at turning my tastes around just to suggestive sell pre-orders on upcoming DVDs, something she did both times I was rung up by her.
Now, only if she would look me deep in the eyes and say, in a breathy tone, "Derek... you know you want Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season One on DVD... Buy it from me and you won't be sorry." How could I resist that?

 

[Brad_W]

Hit her in the head with a bag of HOT nickels, then ask her if she wouldn't mind if you drove her to the emergency room. That way you can talk to her on the way there. Once you get to the emergency room, ask her for her phone number so that you can call her to "see if she's all right." If this doesn't work... just ask her for her phone number.

I've always met girls through friends or work. I met my wife through her brother. I hung out with him for 2 years and he never mentioned that he had a sister. I stopped hanging out with him for about 6 months and one day I just showed up at his house. It just so happened that she showed up at his house too... for the first time. Our meeting was fate because she was going to show up the weekend before, but there was a blizzard so she didn't.

 

[Rob Gillespie]

Has anyone ever had success with meeting and developing a romantic relationship with women at a gym?

When I said 'gym' earlier I'm using it as a generic term. The place I go to has a gym, pool, sauna, steam room, spa etc etc, but everyone says they're going to the 'gym'.

Talking in the gym is difficult. The most I've ever attempted is smile and a brief 'Hi', unless someone has specifically asked something. Most people just want to get on with what they're doing.

The same can be said for the pool (chatting while swimming is impossible anyway), but the sauna, steam room and spa are ideal places for chats. It can be difficult to break the ice sometimes. Some people just wont even make eye contact for fear of having to smile and say something but you'll often find people are willing to share idle talk while they relax. That's pretty much what happened with the gal I talk to. That idle chat has turned into 30,40 minute conversations.

 

[Chris Derby]

How about the adult video store? Has anyone ever had success with meeting and developing a romantic relationship with women at an adult video store?

 

[TheoGB]

OT, but whereabouts are you, Rob? Lass ain't a southern term.
Has anyone ever tried to organise a UK HTF meet?

 

[Philip_G]

How about the adult video store? Has anyone ever had success with meeting and developing a romantic relationship with women at an adult video store?

LOL
how rude and inapropriate.. right up my alley
anywho can't really answer the question.... meeting women isn't something I do well so you'd be mistaken to take advice from me :frowning:

 

[Sam C]

Has anyone ever had success with meeting and developing a romantic relationship with women at a gym?

I see this happening all the time ... I've made jokes about how I was going to go lie down on this lady who was on a hamstring curl machine and then be like ... "Ooops ... I didn't notice you were there." I'm sure I'd get smacked for that ...

 

[Elizabeth S]

I've always been attracted to unavailable women. I don't know what it is. I bet if you assembled 10 women in a room and all but one of them were available, I would be most attracted to the unavailble one. Without even knowing their status. Maybe I just pick up on that they are happier than the others?

That's funny (or not, actually) -- I've always been attracted to (so-called)"unavailable" men. I don't think it has to do with the fact they seem "happier" than the others. I think they seem more confident and secure. Some single men are just a little too desperate -- you can see it a mile away, and it's the ultimate turnoff.

And I don't think "unavailable" women are happier than single women. I know so many extremely unhappy, married women.

 

[Janna S]

I agree with Elizabeth about unhappy "attached" women. I can't put my finger on the studies right now, but there is evidence that men gain health, longevity, stability, etc. by being attached, but women don't.
Also, I have a cynical theory that those who are attracted principally to persons who are unavailable ("attached") are saying more about themselves than about the people they are attracted to. It's the "have your cake and eat it too" phenomenon, or perhaps you could call it windowshopping. No buyer's remorse, no bill to pay, no maintenance, but you can still say you are looking. And if you never find anything/anyone just right, it's not your fault! All the good ones were taken!

 

[Chris Derby]

I know so many extremely unhappy, married women.

(Sigh, I know I'm gonna catch flack for this.)

That usually why I don't let rings stop m from flirting w/ somebody. Somebody will "tell" you when they don't want to be flirted with: "my boyfriend" this, "my husband" that...

 

[Elizabeth S]

Also, I have a cynical theory that those who are attracted principally to persons who are unavailable ("attached") are saying more about themselves than about the people they are attracted to. It's the "have your cake and eat it too" phenomenon, or perhaps you could call it windowshopping. No buyer's remorse, no bill to pay, no maintenance, but you can still say you are looking. And if you never find anything/anyone just right, it's not your fault! All the good ones were taken!

But when it progresses beyond "windowshopping", it is torturous. If anyone is having the cake and eating it, too, it's the married person with a lover.

 

[Jon_B]

You're right Elizabeth, wrong choice of words. More confident is what I should have said.

That usually why I don't let rings stop m from flirting w/ somebody. Somebody will "tell" you when they don't want to be flirted with: "my boyfriend" this, "my husband" that...

I am the opposite when it comes to the above quote. When I find out that the woman in question is "attached", I let it go. I don't pursure it in anyway, shape or form. I've gotten into many discussions/arguments (with my friends) over whether or not this is the right way to approach relationships. They say that going out with someone is not like being married. That until she has a ring on her finger she is available. But I disagree.

Any comments on that?

Jon

 

[Chris Derby]

Well, in my eyes, it really depends on the person's situation. If she wants to be flirted with, why not flirt? She'll let you know when you've gone too far, if you've gone too far. I'm a social person. I'm friendly with all and flirtatious w/ most until I get pushback. Then I back it back down to friendly.

I guess what I'm saying is respect the person's boundries, whatever they may be. For example, I used to go out with this girl. We broke up, she got married and told me that she would never break her vows and always be faithful to her husband, never get divorced, etc. I can respect that. Well, now things have changed and, for her own reasons, she's lookin outside her marriage for "something" else. I can respect that, too. Its her decision to do whatever is going to make her happiest. If her husband isn't "doing it" for her anymore, thats (more than likely) his fault (because I know that she gave it her all).

 

[Adil M]

Chris,

After reading your post I thought:

Is he convincing me or himself?