ThomasL - try earplugs. You don't actually need to LISTEN to the tones to read the SPL meter :D But I know what you mean. The S&V disc pretty much concurrs with your statement - basically, as long as the speakers are set evenly with respect to eachother, the sound will be ballanced...
Kenny, read Steve Ma's last post again. Your answer is there.
I calibrated my SR6200 at -10 volume. 0 is too loud, and even -10 is above what I normally listen to most movies/music at, but I wanted my ref level to be what I consider to be loud but tolerable.