WORST FILMS OF 2005...anyone? Anyone? (1 Viewer)

[JeremyErwin]

Perhaps he means that the director failed. The "anti-auteur?"

(I find it interesting that the "director's cut"--that final expression of the "artistic genius" of the director before it is ruthlessly hacked to pieces by focus groups and shady producers and ratings committees has been hijacked by the studios themselves.

"The tautly plotted, artistic masterpiece you saw in the theaters was only a taste of the newly restored cut on the dvd you hold in your hands. Now with an astonishing 87 minutes of additional footage! Specially formatted to fit your screen."

 

[Brett_M]

Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist -- Utterly bush league filmmaking. It looked like a made-for-cable movie. Bad script, bad direction. I hate when "prequels" do not respect the films they're being made for.

Carlito's Way: Rise to Power -- Complete crap. Should not have been made, let alone released. Innane script and bears no reseblence whatsoever to the book (except for some lifted text) and does not end where a prequel to DePalma's flick should have. Case in point: Luis Guzman plays a different character -- he is in the movie but doesn't play Pachanga? I hate when "prequels" do not respect the films they're being made for.

Kingdom of Heaven -- I want to see the director's cut. Gutted by studio, a real shame.

Havoc -- Pointless and lame. Should be retitled as "Watch Three Scenes of Gratuitous Nudity of Anne Hathaway and Return Promptly."

9 Songs -- Rent a porno instead. It will have better acting and a better plot.

Assisted Living -- I shut it off after 20 agonizing minutes.

Hostage -- Self-indulgent.

Coach Carter -- Retread.

The Fantastic Four -- Most of you have already commented so...I can't help it: The worst mass market, lowest common denominator crap saw in a theater this year, besides...

Chicken Little -- Caught a much needed nap.

Ringers: Lord of the Fans -- Felt embarassed as I watched.

 

[Don_Limey]

Well my top 10 worst theatrical release movies of 2005 are

Boogeyman
Alone in The Dark
Cursed
Bewitched
Honeymooners
Valiant
Rebound
Monster-in-Law
The Wedding Date
and the worst movie of 2005 is

WHITE NOISE in all of its crap, the worst movie of this decade & only the 3rd movie that I have feel asleep while watching in the theater my whole life.

 

[Patrick Sun]

Since I have most of my films ranked already, I'll just scrape off the bottom for my "worst" list:

10. The Dukes of Hazzard
9. Stealth
8. Doom
7. Derailed
6. Elektra
5. Dark Water
4. Bewitched
3. Bad News Bears
2. Elizabethtown
1. The Ring 2

 

[DeeF]

I don't go to the movies anymore, since I've become a home-bound, home-theater kind of guy.

But the movie I saw today definitely qualifies as one of the worst:

The Chronicles of Narnia

 

[Galen_V]

I managed to steer clear from most of the movies listed already, but I fell asleep in a theater for the first time while watching Kingdom of Heaven. Hopefully there is a reason to explain why the movie went two hours before finding a plot, but by then I was so bored that I couldn't keep my eyes open during the climax. Also, I was really disappointed by Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy--I thought there was a lot of potential there that went to waste.

 

[PaulP]

Has this been posted yet?

http://www.imdb.com/features/rto/2006/poll/worstresults

 

[RyanAn]

Brokeback Mountain? King Kong? Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith?

Apparently I missed something here. Maybe Ebert was wrong?

Three A films on that list, it's ridiculus. I suppose King Kong was worse Ring 2. I should have known!

Ryan

 

[Inspector Hammer!]

Okay, now, i'm all for people having their own view points and opinions of course, but how in the name of all that is holy could King Kong make some of these lists?

When I wasn't about to cry, I was constantly having to pick my jaw up off the floor.

Ah well, SOMEONE has to hate it I suppose.

 

[BrianShort]

Well, Kong and Brokeback are also on the Best of the Year list at IMDB too!

I haven't seen a lot of the movies mentioned frequently by people here, since I purposely skipped some of them. I did like Crash though.

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was very dissapointing IMO. Didn't care for it in the theater, and liked it even less when a friend rented it on DVD later.

I thought Madagascar should have just been about the penguins. It was the only part I really found entertaining. The rest was failed gag after failed gag.

I really need to keep track of what I watch, as I tend to forget some of what I watch until I see it listed, then I remember seeing it and whether I liked it or not.

 

[Mike Graham]

In no particular order:

Into The Blue
House of Wax
A History of Violence

Note on that last one: I'm a big Cronenberg fan, and was looking forward to the film. While I think the film started out great, the last half of the movie I found to be so silly that it turned out to be a huge disappointment for me considering the talent involved, so I've included it on this list!

 

[Holadem]

I haven't watched a great many movies this year but here goes.

Seven Swords (Qi jian) is the single worse movie I have seen this year. Almost as bad as Soul Plane, the worse movie I have ever seen. Completely incoherent, atrocious acting and worse of all (because that would have at least made the movie bearable) extremly boring fight sequences.

I am not a fan of this type of flick (I found Hero and CTHD merely OK) and certainly would never have checked it out myself. I went at the insistence of the lady (she loves the genre). The poor thing hated it even more than I did and now fears she's lost all credibility in the matter, espcially since she's been telling me Once Upon a Time in China, from the same director, is the best thing since sliced bread. You know, it just occured to me that I was dragged to see Soul Plane in 2004 by my then g/f as well. Hmmmm.....

Flightplan - not a horrible movie, just progressively sunk into the absurd as the movie went on. Overall, mostly forgettable, sometimes insulting.

Cinderella Man was mostly bland and often too sweet. Good photography, performances and that last fight saved it from being a waste of time and $$$ for me.

But that's all really.

--
H

 

[Kain_C]

I'd like to add Stealth and The Island to my list.

Stealth was pure unbridled stupidity without a single entertaining second throughout it's overlong running time. Even a love for jets couldn't help me come close to finding something enjoyable in this cliched mess.

The Island started off nicely, with a good atmosphere and a restrained visual style (quite the opposite of most Bay dreck). But once things started to "move", typical Bayisms reared their ugly head and this descended into a brainless mosiac of implausible stunts and ridiculous, laughable situations. This reaffirmed my belief that Bay is one of the worst filmmakers working today.

 

[MatthewA]

Another 2005 movie I strongly disliked was "Chicken Little." The characters were so freaking neurotic I thought Woody Allen did an early script draft, and the whole "I'm OK, you're OK" stuff should have gone out of style when Walt was still living. This movie was finger-lickin' bad!

 

[Brian.L]

Instead of just listing movies like Dirty Love, Alone in the Dark, and Dukes of Hazzard--movies that I figured would be bad ahead of time--I think it's better to talk about the most disappointing/overrated movies. This doesn't even nesscarily mean that they are bad, but that you were expecting more. With that in mind...

Most Disappointing/Overrated movies of 2005
Crash
The Chronic(what)les of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe
A History of Violence
Lord of War
Melinda and Melinda
Me and You and Everyone We Know

The list is from least to most, i.e. Me and You And Everyone We Know was the most disappointing this year for me. However, all my friends like or love it to some degree or another. My feelings can be summed up more or less by this review.

I would also agree with The Island. I didn't have high expectations going in, but the first 30 minutes made me think there might be a good movie coming before it turned into Bad Boys 3.

 

[Chris]

Has anyone mentioned "Son of the Mask" ?

 

[David Williams]

I didn't think there was a movie that could top Bewitched as the WORST movie of 2005, then I had the misfortune of seeing Prime, which has to be the most pointless self-indulgent piece of writer/director crap I've seen in the last 5 years, since I saw Hedwig and the Angry Inch. The actors (particularly Uma Thurman) were solid (except I don't think I bought Streep's Jewishness) but the script sold them down the river.

 

[PatW]

I haven't seen 10 but of the one's I did see the most disappointing or the one's I hated are:
Dark Water - hated the ending
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Bewitched - hated this one with a passion. I thought the Kidman character was written as an idiot. Too bad, the Sam character on the Tv show was so smart and worldly and interesting.
Brothers Grimm - love Terry Gilliam but this mess was hard to sit through.
Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy - while there was some amusing scenes, it still was a big letdown. I guess I just expected more.

 

[Elizabeth S]

My worst film of the year is The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Just very weird and not funny at all.

Other disappointments:

Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior
Hostage
Robots
Melinda and Melinda
Dear Frankie
Unleashed
Après vous...
Wedding Crashers
Red Eye
Stay
Prime

Quite overrated:

Me and You and Everyone We Know
De battre mon coeur s'est arrêté (The Beat That My Heart Skipped)

 

[Michael Reuben]

It puts a smile on my face that someone at HTF even mentioned this film, regardless of the context (I enjoyed it).

M.