A: Hey, B. Thanks for coming. I know you don't want to be here and you don't want to hear what I have to say. B: Just make this quick. And stop trying to ingratiate yourself to me. I already want to beat the crap out of you for dragging me down here. A: All right. B: And what is this place -- looks like some sort of halfed-ass Bat Cave. A: This is my basement home theater set up. Dual screens. A 100" screen on the left, another on the right. Set up for just this event. B: You need to get laid. Seriously. A: Never mind that. What is your favorite Disney movie. B: Iron Will. A: Okay. Favorite animated Disney movie. B: The one with the Giant monkey. A: Okay, what is your favorite Disney CARTOON movie. B: Robin Hood. You know that. A: Exactly. Yes. Yes, I know that. Okay. We're making progress. B: Do you have anything to drink? You're starting to bore the @#$^ out of me. A: An entire litre of Knob Creek awaits you - now...pay attention to the image on the right... (a moment plays on the screen to the left...a shot of Mole from "The Wind in the Willows", a shot where he outruns a knife thrown towards his bottom) B: Yeah, that's from some old movie, right? So? A: Watch this. (a shot plays on the screen to the right...a shot of Little John during the "Oo-de-Lally" number, a shot where he outruns an arrow fired towards his bottom) B: Whoah. That looked like the same shot. A: It was. It was the same animation, only with a new character drawn on top of it. B:...Well...so? Who cares? Robin Hood is still great. Dude, I've seen that movie 20 times growing up. There is no way a lot of that movie was traced from another movie. A: How many instances of such footage would it take to convince you otherwise? B: I don't know. 20? (the screening continues...with a demonstration of how mutliple shots in Robin Hood were traced from "Mr. Toad", "The Aristocats" "Snow White" "Goliath II" "The Jungle Book" and more...) B: (shaken)...uhm...uhm...that don't mean nothin'. A: I'm sorry? B: It don't mean NOTHIN! A: Do you know what legendary Disney animator Milt Kahl screamed when he saw what was going on with Robin Hood, all the tracing and cut corners? B: No. A: I can't repeat it. But...it was not good...and not polite. He compared certain Disney employees to...well...prostitutes. B: So? Just because, like, a lot of the footage was traced from other cartoons, the movie is like, still fun. It has a great ending. A: Oh, does it? What is the ending? B: Robin Hood frees everybody and burns down the castle and defeats Prince John. A: He does? B: Yeah. A: Robin Hood defeats Prince John? B: Yeah. A: Actually, not yeah. In fact, Disney's Robin Hood is actually strangely unique in that the hero DOES NOT soundly defeat the villain and restore order. Robin Hood actually runs away. He shakes his fist and he runs away. B: But wait...the movie ends with.. A...ends with the castle on fire. Yes. B: and then we see, um, we see...I can't remeber how but, Prince John is defeated. And we see that moment somewhere. I don't remember it but it must be there. A: No. You don't see that. You know why? B: Okay, smart ass. Why? A: It was cut from the movie. B: Dude. A: Dude. The original ending of Robin Hood had the Sheriff all but destroying the castle trying to kill or capture Robin Hood, and Robin, of course, escapes. He leaps out of a burning tower into a moat and survives. And then he runs away. RUNS AWAY. Prince John realizes he has lost his hostages, his gold, and now - his castle! He freaks out. BUT...Later...in the darkness...a shadow emerges. Trigger and Nutsy demand the figure show himself...it is King Richard, and he is pissed off. B: Oooh, cool! He raises hell, I bet. A: None of the King Richard footage is in the movie. It was cut. Why was it cut? I don't know. But the entire "King Richard Returns" sequence was cut from Robin Hood DESPITE the fact that at least a good healthy part of it was INKED and PAINTED. Moments from this aired on the Disney channel in the 80's on the old Disney Family Album, my alphabetic friend. B: So? So what? So what's the big deal about this ending? A: How does Robin Hood end now? B: I don't know - let me think. Uh - Robin and the bunny - they're in the water. They, uh, they shake their fist and say a pox on you or some such and then they get away. A: And? B: And what? A: And what happens after? B: The Prince watches Robin get away and he gets mad and he chases the snake and the castle burns. So? And? A: Exatly. AND...? What happens NEXT? B: I don't know. The picture fades. Then we come back. Yeah, I know. That rooster steps out from behind a tree playing his guitar. A: EXACTLY. You remember what the rooster says? B: No. A: He says, "You know, I thought we'd never get rid of [Prince John and the Sherrif and Sir Hiss], but lucky for us, King Richard returned, and - well - he just straightened everything out. B: Um...really? A: Yeah. They cut the scene where Richard returned and restored order. So they just had the Rooster tell us what he did. B: I never realized that. A: Yeah, you know, this is probably the only version of Robin Hood on film where Robin Hood runs away at the end, and somebody steps out from behind a tree and tells us the bad guys got defeated by someone else. B: Wow. A: Now put that togetjer with the several instances of animation traced from other movies. B: Uh huh. A: And what are you left with? B: Robin Hood is a movie with shoddy production values, a movie that traces moments of animation from several other Disney animated films, and is the only version of Robin Hood on film where Robin Hood runs away instead of defeating the Prince and the Sherriff, and the true ending was cut, and a rooster steps out from behnd a tree and tells us how the bad guys were brought down, instead of the movie showing us. A: But the songs are good. B: The songs are great. A: And so -- what have you learned today? B: This is actually a bad movie, with a bad script, only with fun characters and great songs. A: And? B: Someday I hope to see the full version on DVD. A: And? B: It can't be that bad if I want to see more of it. A: (pause) B: Hello?