What one piece of literature, poetry, or piece of music seemed to identify with you? (1 Viewer)

[Eve T]

First off this is long. Sorry about that. :b

I was sitting here tonight and had the oppurtunity to hear some of Henry Rollins "spoken word" stuff.
There was one bit he did called "I know you"
It was to me as if a light came on, as if he really did know me. I was wondering who else has read or heard something that deeply touched them and made them feel not so alone in the world because someone else seemed to have read your mind and had been in the same place you are or were? What one piece of literature, or a poem or whatever made you finally feel understood? You don't have to quote the whole thing as I'm about to do, but you may if you wish.
Heres mine and it may let some of my fellow HTF members in on what kind of person I really am or atleast how I've felt. Anyone else out there ever feel like this: ??

I know you.
You were too short you had bad skin.
You couldn’t talk to them very well.
Words didn’t seem to work.
They lied when they came out your mouth.
You tried SO hard to understand them.
You wanted to be a part of what was happening.
You saw them having fun, and it seemed like such a mystery almost magic.
Made you think that there was something wrong with you. You’d look in the mirror.
You thought that you were ugly, and that everyone was looking at you.
So you learned to be invisible to look down, to avoid conversation.
The hours, days, weekends, ahhh the weekend nights alone.
Where were you?
In the basement?
In the attic?
In your room? Working some job just to have something to do, Just to have a place to put your self. Just to have a chance to get away from them, a chance to get away from the
Ones that made you feel so strange and ill at ease inside yourself?
Did you ever get invited to one of their party’s?
You sat and wondered if you would go or not.
For hours you imagined the scenarios that might transpire.
If they would laugh at you, if you would know what to do, if you would have the right things on,
If they would notice that you came from a different planet?
Did you get all brave in your thoughts like you thought you were going to be able to go in there and deal with it and have a great time? Did you think that you might be the life of the party? That all these people were going to talk to you and you would find out that you were wrong that you had a lot of friends and you weren’t so strange after all?
Did you end up going? Did they mess with you? Did they single you out? Did you find out that you were invited because they thought you were so weird?
Yeah, I think I know you. You spent a lot of time full of hate, a hate that was pure as sunshine a hate that saw for miles, a hate the kept you up a night a hate that filled your every waking moment, a hate that carried you for a long time.
Yes, I think I know you. You couldn’t figure out what they saw in the way they lived, home was not home, your room was home a corner was home the place they weren’t that was home. I know you. You’re sensitive and you hide it because you fear getting stepped on one more time. It seems that when you show a part of yourself that is the least bit vulnerable someone takes advantage of you. One of them steps on you.
They mistake kindness for weakness. But you know the difference.
You’ve been the brunt of their weakness for years and strength is something that you know a bit about because you had to be strong to keep yourself alive.
You know yourself very well now and you don’t trust people. You know them too well.
You try to find that special person, someone you can be with someone you can touch someone you can talk to someone you won’t feel so strange around and you found that they don’t really exist. You feel closer to people on movie screens. Yeah I think I know you. You spend a lot of time daydreaming and people have made comment to that effect telling you that your self involved and self centered. But they don’t know do they?
About the long night shifts alone, about the years of keeping yourself company. All the nights you wrapped your arms around yourself so you could imagine someone holding you. The hours on indecision, self doubt,the intense depression. A blinding hate
The rage that made you stagger the devastation of rejection. Well maybe they do know. But if they do they sure do a good job of hiding it. It astounds you on how they can be so smooth. How they seem to pass through life as if life itself was some kind of divine gift.
And it infuriates you to watch yourself with your apparent skill in finding everyway possible to screw it up. For you life is a long trip. Terrifying and wonderful, birds sing to you at night and the rain and the sun and the changing seasons are true friends. Solitude is a hard one ally faithful and patient. Yeah I think I know you.

Seems that Henry Rollins knows me quite well. Who knows you?

 

[Jefferson]

That is great, Eve....looks like he knows me too.
I guess i have several of these types of things...um.....Catcher in the Rye by JD Salinger............and...the lyricist named Lorenz Hart who wrote with Richard Rodgers. The Hart lyric that most people know is "My Funny Valentine"...Most of his stuff, the sad and the funny..... just speaks to me when i read it/hear it. When i'm feeling really lonely, or even lazy...... I think about his song, "Spring is Here".......especially the line "no ambition, no desire leads me......." LOL

 

[AllanN]

Usually when im feeling shitty these songs come to mind.

i beat my machine
it's a part of me
it's inside of me
i'm stuck in this dream
it's changing me
i am becoming

the me that you know he had some second thoughts
he's covered with scabs he is broken and sore
the me that you know he doesn't come around much
that part of me isn't here anymore

all pain disappears
it's the nature of
of my circuitry
drowns out all i hear
there's no escape from this
my new consciousness

the me that you know he used to have feelings
but the blood has stopped pumping and he is left to decay
the me that you know is now made up of wires
and even when i'm right with you i'm so far away

i can try to get away but i've strapped myself in
i can try to scratch away the sound in my ears
i can see it killing away all of my bad parts
i don't want to listen but it's all too clear

hiding backwards inside of me
i feel so unafraid
annie, hold a little tighter
i might just slip away

it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head
it won't give up it wants me dead
and goddamn this noise inside my head

just a reflection
just a glimpse
just a little reminder
of all the what abouts
and all the might have
could have beens
another day
some other way
but not another reason to continue
and now you're one of us
the wretched

the hopes and prays
the better days
the far aways
forget it

it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
it didn't turn out the way you wanted it, did it?
it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
it didn't turn out the way you wanted it, did it?

now you know
this is what it feels like
now you know
this is what it feels like

the clouds will part and the sky cracks open
and god himself will reach his fucking arm
through
just to push you down
just to hold you down
stuck in this hole with the shit and the piss
and it's hard to believe it could come down to this
back at the beginning
sinking
spinning

and in the end
we still pretend
the time we spend
not knowning when
you're finally free
and you could be (but it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to)
(it didn't turn out quite the way that you wanted it)

now you know
this is what it feels like
now you know
this is what it feels like

now you know
this is what it feels like
now you know
this is what it feels like (you can try to stop it but it keeps on coming)
(you can try to stop it but it)

Allot of times when im pissed about something, especially someone the following quote comes to mind:

"...fear leads to anger... anger leads to hate.. hate leads to suffering."

 

[Eve T]

Jefferson:
I must admit that I've never read catcher in the Rye. Perharps I just might do that now. BTW I like "my funny valentine".
Alan, Many of Trent Reznors lyrics have spoken to me too.
Infact that little ditty that I placed above from Henry Rollins spoken words was accompanied by NIN's "A warm place" softy playing in the background....

 

[John Spencer]

I've always found solace in the last quatrain of "Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening" by Robert Frost. There's just something beautiful about the way his thought is expressed that makes the fourth quatrain ring so universal, even above and beyond the previous 3 quatrains. Here's the entire poem for those 4 people who haven't read it:


Whose woods these are, I think I know.
His house is in the village, though.
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near.
Between the woods and snowy lake,
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark, and deep.
But I have promises to keep.
And miles to go before I sleep.
And miles to go before I sleep.


Man, the depth inside such a simple poem never ceases to amaze me, and bring me a little warmth.

 

[Eve T]

Thats a beautiful poem.

 

[Eve T]

Well, I guess this thread is gonna be an el-floppo.

Thanks for the ones who did reply. It's always interesting to read or see what has really spoken to someone. It kinda tells us what type of person they are and we in turn learn that we are all very human.

Peace,
Eve

 

[John Thomas]

Don't give up on us yet, Eve. There's plenty of us out here - you've just got to keep trying to reach us.
One song that's always stuck with me through ups and downs in my life is Aaron Copland's Fanfare For The Common Man. Words aren't necessary to convey emotion - this piece is an excellent example of this.

 

[AllanN]

Here is my list of movies and scenes that I have a personal connection with.

A.I.: Artificial Intelligence -Especially the scene where David's mother leaves him in the forest. This scene really shows pure loss and rejection. The feelings that are portrayed are exactly how I feel when rejected. But after a long journey of self discovery David finally finds happiness.

American Beauty - The scene where Lester and his wife are in bed together and tells her how he feels and then says (and im paraphrasing here) "it makes you wonder what else you can do that you forgot about". This is Lsters turning point in life. I think we all have those times where we realize what we really want out of life. He was brave enough and just ran with it.

Annie Hall - I love the opening scene where he tells the joke about not wanting to be a member of a club that would have him as a member. The rest of this movie is just a timeless insight into relationships. I especially love his depiction of LA "I forgot my mantra".

Can't Hardly Wait - A very unappreciated "teen" movie. One that I think actually had the most to say. This came out the summer after I graduated from high school and I really related with all of the characters.

Fight Club - This movie works for me on so many levels that im not going to get that deep into it. At least on this post. It changelles who we are and what we really want to be. It lets out our primal emotions. But keeps us grounded: "we are not special". My fav scene is where Tyler burned Jacks hand. "This is your burning hand, this is your pain, its right here"

Gattaca - A basic and simple story about one mans struggle with society.

The Graduate - Im sure every college graduate feels the same way Ben does. Suddenly he is thrust into a whole new world that is much more complex than his simple college days. It is to much for him and he find's peace in Mr. Robinson but soon she becomes the root of a whole new set of issues for Ben. "I have one word for you, Plastics"

Grosse Pointe Blank - Another basic and simple but comical story about one mans struggle with society and fitting into a norm. (Notice a trend here?) "How is your live going? ... Its in progress."

High Fidelity - A 90's Annie Hall. "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 16 and I have come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains."

Mumford - I love how Mumford just changes from someone who was really screwed up to a "normal" lifestyle. "In this world you are who you say you are."

Vanilla Sky - Shows us how fragile we all are. It also is a wonderful glimpse into our modern American culture. It takes is through the most traumatic moments of David's live but shows give us hope for a better day. "Every minute is another chance to turn it all around"

Im sorry If the quotes are not exact.

 

[Jefferson]

I think this is a great thread idea, EveT...

 

[Mary M S]

The scene in Grand Canyon, in bed, where Mary McDonnell as Claire, is trying to explain to Kevin Kline as Mack, her sense of things meant to be, and the mysterious connections/happenstance’s in life.
The entire scene around the lines of ‘Oh Mack, wouldn’t it have been terrible if I had run right past that baby, and we would have heard on the 10:00 news, A dead baby found on our street, how awful.
But I didn’t. And whose to say that doesn’t mean anything, and how do you know that that man you just met, (Danny Glover) won’t be your friend until the day you die. Sometimes things do happen for a reason, and they are miracles, but we just don’t recognize them.”

 

[Zen Butler]

Eve, also think this is a good thread, just requires a bit of thought.
Any Kipling or Twain books, they remind me of my youth. The real alone times, when I was 5 or 6 doing make-believe missions, building forts, hideouts and other journeys. I love the fact they are able to do this.
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland because I still struggle with growing up
those are two off the top of my head, there are many more

 

[Luis Esp]

Peter Pan. I don't know if it's a good thing or bad thing. I see everyone around me getting older, doing the whole "grown up" thing ( getting married, having kids etc) and I still feel like I'm turn 20 (although there are days I feel like I'm still going through puberty). Funny thing is I just turn 33 and although most people call it a blessing, I look about 25.
Another literary figure I've indentified in the past with is "The Phantom of the Opera". Look beyond the murders and his madness, the heart of his issues was that he just wanted to belong.
As for songs, for the longest time it Paul Simon's "Waiting In Vain". "When something goes wrong, I'm the first to admit it, first to admit it last one to know", but with a little work on my self image, I seem to have the song "The Spy Who Loved Me" whenever I'm feeling negative. "Nobody does it quite the way you do, baby, you're the best".
Okay, mine time's up on the couch, who do I make out the cheque to?

 

[Carlo_M]

Windmills - by Toad the Wet Sprocket, from the album Dulcinea

I spend too much time raiding windmills
We'd go side by side, laugh until it's right

There's something that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
Take the darkest cloud and break it open
Water to repair what we have broken

There's something that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
And baby any way the wind blows
It's all worth waiting for

Pull on the borders to lighten the load
Tell all the passengers we're going home

I spend too much time seeking shelter
World without end couldn't hold her

There's something that you won't show
Waiting where the light goes
And baby any way the wind blows
It's all worth waiting for...

Any way the wind blows

 

[joe rizzuto]

am i right ?

new york city
we lived above an empty store
on the avenue
four of us
in a two bedroom apartment

winters
cold and damp
hot water heating
the pipes
that
always seemed
to hiss at us

daddy
slept on the couch
between jobs
days for the city
full time
nites for extra money
part time
(he was a good man)
i remember
my father
(step-father really)
a smiling man
who always seemed angry
he was hard working
capable of a good time
although not
with me
or
my mother
or
my sister
(half-sister really)

he had large hands
a tall wide frame
and muscles
beautiful salt and pepper hair
and a voice
loud enough
to frighten the soul
from a little boy


there were
rules
and somehow
i managed
to break all of them
(often)



feeling like an afterthought
(usually)
i couldn’t do much
right

couldn’t hold the flashlite
so the beam
was in
the right place

couldn’t pass the right tool
when demanded
even though
the shapes
names
and reasons for being
were never
described to me

i always guessed
i wasn’t
smart enough
to have been born
with the same information
as every one else
at 46
i’m still treated
the same as
when i was 12

but for me
its different now
i’m no longer
intimidated
no longer
afraid
to ask
the questions
that need
to be asked

my only
fear
is
following
in his footsteps
©1997
joe rizzuto

 

[Mary M S]

Joe,
That's poignant and beautiful.

 

[Jonathan Smith]

My 8th grade English teacher made us memorize this poem, and I still remember it eight years later. It has come to mean more to me lately than it did at the time...

Rudyard Kipling
If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!


I think a lot of people could do themselves some good trying to follow some of the ideals he speaks of.

 

[joe rizzuto]

mary ms,
thanks for your kind words
joe

 

[StanleyK]

To me... the most beautiful poem ever written.

Do not go gentle into that good night

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

-Dylan Thomas

 

[Andrew_Sch]

It's the Beatles "Nowhere Man" for me, because I spend most of my time sitting in my nowhere land (computer chair or room), I don't listen to people half the time when they're talking to me, and I don't have much of a social life, so I don't know what I'm missin'.