Yes, this is an actual article from the Knox News Sentinel. I'm surrounded by idiots. --- http://www.knoxville.com/kns/local_n...844429,00.html --- Greasy substance on magazine causes scare in Maryville By Bryan Mitchell, News-Sentinel staff writer MARYVILLE - Three women spent the better half of Wednesday night locked in the back of an ambulance after they feared contamination from a greasy substance on magazines they leafed through in a beauty parlor. The fear led the city's emergency response team to shift into a heightened state of alert and caused a hospital to create a quarantine zone. However, the incident turned out to be nothing more than overanxious citizens reacting to perceived threats of biological terrorism. "None of us suspect that there is a hazardous material here," said Maryville Police Department Capt. Mike Johnston. "This is a clear example of what can happen when everyone is on edge." The episode began about 6:30 p.m. when Maryville police responded to a call from a beauty shop at 1102 W. Broadway. Three women inside the shop reported they came into contact with an unknown oily substance on magazines, according to Johnston. The magazines had a return address of Florida, and the women believed they had come in contact with anthrax, which has infected three people in Florida. The Maryville Fire Department arrived, along with Rural/Metro, and the women were taken to Blount Memorial Hospital for precautionary measures. The women, who did not complain of being ill, were not allowed inside the hospital for fear they could contaminate other patients. The ambulance parked behind the hospital and was positioned between other rescue vehicles. The women, two Rural/Metro employees and one Maryville police officer were decontaminated, according to Rob Webb, a spokesman for Rural/Metro. The women then were admitted to the hospital as a precaution. The county health department will examine the magazines today, but authorities have no reason to believe the magazines were contaminated. "I think the most dangerous thing to come out of a beauty shop is the gossip they spread," Johnston said.