"Time Travelers PLEASE HELP!! " - funny spam (1 Viewer)

[Lary Larson]

Rescued this spam from my Hotmail junk folder...

If you are a time traveler or alien disguised as human and or
have the technology to travel physically through time I need your
help!
My life has been severely tampered with and cursed!!
I have suffered tremendously and am now dying!
I need to be able to:
Travel back in time.
Rewind my life including my age back to 4.
Be able to remember what I know now so that I can prevent my life
from being tampered with again after I go back.
I am in very great danger and need this immediately!
I am aware that there are many types of time travel, and that
humans do not do well through certain types.
I need as close to temporal reversion as possible, as safely as
possible. To be able to rewind the hands of time in such a way
that the universe of now will cease to exist.
I know that there are some very powerful people out there with
alien or government equipment capable of doing just that.
If you can help me I will pay for your teleport or trip down
here, Along with hotel stay, food and all expenses. I will pay
top dollar for the equipment. Proof must be provided.
Please be advised that any temporal device
that you may employ must account for X, Y, and Z coordinates as
well
as the temporal location.
I have a time machine now, but it has limited abilitys and is
useless without
a vortex. If you can provide information on how to create vortex
generator or
where I can get some of the blue glowing moon crystals this would
also
be helpful.
Also if you are one of the very, very, few beings with the
ability to edit the universe PLEASE REPLY!!!
Only if you have this technology and can help me please send me a
(SEPARATE) email to:
[email protected]
Please do not reply if your an evil alien!
Thanks

 

[Scott Hayes]

Thats too much! I hope its just a joke and some poor soul doesnt believe that stuff. But I wonder if I could get in on it. I wouldnt mind going back to the age of 4 with what I know now, I'd by a truckload of microsoft stock.

 

[Dave Poehlman]

Too bad... my time machine is in the shop at the moment. :frowning:

 

[Wayne Bundrick]

Your time machine may be in the shop Dave, but given the picture in your sig maybe you should tell [email protected] that you've got a vortex he can use.