Those Movies, the Horrifically Bad Ones (1 Viewer)

[Emcee]

Okay, so at a Christmas party last night my girlfriend and I got to talking about wanting to dedicate an entire day to watching the movies considered to be some of the worst our cinema has to offer.

Some of the movies we discussed were:
Plan 9 from Outer Space
Las Vegas Hillbillys
The Fat Spy

There's more, I know, but these are the three that came into my head first late last night. If you've seen any of my other posts, you will know I'm in a Jayne Mansfield kick right now, so watching horrifically bad movies featuring her will be a definitive treat for this viewer. I've been unprivileged (or privileged, depending how you see it) to see Las Vegas Hillbillys and The Fat Spy before, but that was a number of years ago on badly received VHS copies. These movies are going for just a few bucks on Amazon and eBay right now, so I'm going to buy them an get to watching.

What's some other titles I can toss into my viewing?

 

[Keith Cobby]

The worst film i have ever seen is The Final Programme (1973).

And, of course, anything with Will Ferrell.

 

[Emcee]

The worst film i have ever seen is The Final Programme (1973).

And, of course, anything with Will Ferrell.

I don't believe I've ever even heard of The Final Programme.

On the other hand, however, I've seen many a Will Ferrell movie, and some of them I've actually liked. Don't be too hard on the fella.

 

[TJPC]

Yes, it’s not like he mentioned Adam Sandler!

 

[Nick*Z]

The Fan (1981) - painful experience to wade through, between Lauren Bacall's disastrous debut as a Broadway musical revue diva who croaks like a toad and can't sing a note, and the chop-shop editing, and the really hammy acting all around. Just awful.

Also - Staircase (1969) Rex Harrison and Richard Burton as a two old flaming queens who co-own a barber shop.

Myra Breckinridge (1970) - yeah. Like anybody would believe Raquel Welsh was a transgender woman! Painful appearance by Mae West.

Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970) as if Valley of the Dolls was not enough. Total bastardization of Jacqueline Suzanne's premise, taken to the camp extreme by Russ Meyers and pretty much an excuse for some softcore inserts.

Ultrachrist! (2003) - Jesus reinvents himself as a spandex wearing sin-fighter in Manhattan.

At Long Last Love (1975) - just get actors who can sing and dance if you're going to make a musical.

The Swarm (1978) after making two of the greatest disaster movies ever, Irwin Allen laid a couple of eggs in rapid succession. The Swarm was followed by When Time Ran Out (1980). Bees and volcanoes, and hammy acting, bad special effects, dead end plots. From disaster epics to just plain disastrous results. Now, that's progress! Not!

Can't Stop the Music (1980) - a movie about disco at a time when disco was out of vogue. Who came up with this one? Oh, right. Allan Carr. Enough said!

From Justin to Kelly (2003) - take 2 American Idol winners and toss them into a disposable little nothing that has them sing...allot! A movie made by and for dummies.

Gigli (2003) what's with 2003?!? Not a banner year for movies IMO. Affleck and Lopez did some of their worst acting ever in this forgettable fluff, designed to capitalize on their real life romance. What tripe!

A Little Bit of Heaven (2011) dull as paint and paint-by-the-numbers rom/com that is neither romantic nor funny. What's the point?

Dirty Love (2005) Jenny McCarthy runs up against an endless parade of dorks after her hunky boyfriend is caught in bed with another. Badly scripted and even more benignly played.

 

[Angelo Colombus]

Recently it has to be The Lone Ranger (2013) with Johnny Depp. That movie stank more than his horse's rear end.

 

[Emcee]

Just found this on Amazon. Gotta order it and see what's happening!

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000QCUA0C/ref=ox_sc_act_title_2?smid=A2Y55QRN05SOHU&psc=1

 

[Keith Cobby]

I don't believe I've ever even heard of The Final Programme.

On the other hand, however, I've seen many a Will Ferrell movie, and some of them I've actually liked. Don't be too hard on the fella.

The Final Programme was a DVD.

I had the misfortune to pay to see Bewitched.

 

[Emcee]

The Final Programme was a DVD.

I had the misfortune to pay to see Bewitched.

Oh, the Bewitched movie is dreadful. I was hoping all that I had heard about it would be proven wrong, but sadly it was proven to be very, very right.

Bad. And not so bad it's good kinda bad, either. Just bad.

 

[Keith Cobby]

Just found this on Amazon. Gotta order it and see what's happening!

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000QCUA0C/ref=ox_sc_act_title_2?smid=A2Y55QRN05SOHU&psc=1

Jayne Mansfield's best film is Too Hot to Handle. Although made in colour, the DVD is in b&w. German DVD is in colour but dubbed in German. Should be on blu ray.

 

[Emcee]

Jayne Mansfield's best film is Too Hot to Handle. Although made in colour, the DVD is in b&w. German DVD is in colour but dubbed in German. Should be on blu ray.

I'd agree that Too Hot to Handle is among Jayne's best after Fox starting loaning her out in 1959. I know there's some short videos circling the internet of the original color prints, but it seems now that most copies of the film are the U.S. B&W versions, although with the English title still tacked on. (It was called Playgirl After Dark when released in America.)

Personally, I'd say her crowning achievements were the two movies she did for director Frank Tashlin: the rock-n-roll comedy The Girl Can't Help It and the film version of Will Success Spoil Rock Hunter? She's unbelievably beautiful in both, and Tashlin, who used is prior experience as an animator for Warner's, was the only director that pulled out of Jayne the satirical comedy potential that was always just beneath the surface. She worked best when presented as "normal" with an underlining effect of somewhat unnatural.

The Wayward Bus, the forever bashed film version of Steinbeck's book, actually gives Jayne her best serious work on camera. She turns in a subtle performance which eventually won her a Golden Globe Award for Most Promising Newcomer.

The reason I'm wanting to order the Hillbilly Comedy Collection is because it includes two of the movies I've routinely seen referenced as among the worst of films, namely Las Vegas Hillbillys and its sequel, Hillbillys in a Haunted House. As for the other two in the set, I've never heard anything about either of them, but I'm hoping they'll too be horrendous and give me something to toss my two cents worth on here on this thread.

Happy viewing!

 

[bujaki]

Howdy, Broadway! if you can find a copy. I viewed a 16mm copy decades ago. Inept film making from the early '30s. Nothing saves it.

 

[Walter Kittel]

Please spare yourself the anguish of watching 1983's The Prey. I used to see a lot of schlock when I was much younger and this might be the worst film I ever saw theatrically.

- Walter.

 

[Josh Steinberg]

I’d nominate Lindsay Lohan’s “I Know Who Killed Me” as being epically, historically bad. Best to see it knowing as little about it as possible - it seems to change genres every few minutes while fumbling towards a story. Stunningly awful in every way, it must be seen to be believed.

 

[OLDTIMER]

At Long Last Love (1975) - just get actors who can sing and dance if you're going to make a musical.

I know most reviewers rate this movie as really bad, but believe it or not it's one of my favorites. I see it as a group of actors having a hoot of a time. The fact that none can sing adds to the fun. Am I alone or does anybody else like it?
For really bad musicals try "Down to Earth" with Rita Hayworth, or "Jupiter's Darling" with Esther Williams.

 

[TJPC]

I know most reviewers rate this movie as really bad, but believe it or not it's one of my favorites. I see it as a group of actors having a hoot of a time. The fact that none can sing adds to the fun. Am I alone or does anybody else like it?
For really bad musicals try "Down to Earth" with Rita Hayworth, or "Jupiter's Darling" with Esther Williams.

I’ve always enjoyed it and could never understand the hatred. Burt Reynolds is charming and Madeline Kahn had a wonderful voice and sang on Broadway. It is really nice to finally see it complete on Blu ray. The version they would play on TV was a slightly different cut than the theatrical version I saw.

 

[Dave Moritz]

These are some of the movies that get my vote!

• The Emoji Movie
• Dungeons & Dragons
• Superman IV: The Quest For Peace
• Glitter
• Plan 9 From Outer Space
• The Love Guru
• Kazaam
• The Adventures Of Pluto Nash
• Spice World
• Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie
• White Chicks

 

[Jeffrey D]

The first film that popped into my head when I saw the thread title is Freddy Got Fingered. The worst film I ever saw.
A few others-
Soul Plane
Swept Away
Dodgeball
Skyscraper
Hurricane Heist

 

[Mysto]

We have to recognize there are two distinct categories of BAD movies. Those that are so bad they are a hoot to watch (especially with a group and drunk) and those that make you wish you could just get your time back.
Plan 9 from Outer Space survives and thrives because it is in the former category some of the others listed are just bad - you will be forever sorry you wasted your life on them.

 

[timk1041]

Plenty of older horror/sci fi titles: Frankenstein Meets The Space Monster(1965), The Brain That Wouldn't Die(1962), Voodoo Woman(1957), Astounding She Monster(1957), Giant From The Unknown(1958), Frankenstein's Daughter(1958), Missile To The Moon(1958) among others.