Things you might hear on a power buy thread.

Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by Hugh M, Jan 10, 2002.

  1. Hugh M

    Hugh M Second Unit

    Dec 31, 2001
    Likes Received:
    or a Powerbuy thread gone bad.
    disclaimer: let me start out by saying that this has nothing to do with my real experiences in current or past powerbuys...I am just making this up........(right)
    I think powerbuys are great, and the internet has provided this to us, and good things happen more than bad.
    But you may know what its like to be involved in a powerbuy for a vaporware or something, and then not too long after the dust settles you see some more people going at something similar. its pretty funny and frustrating at the same time.I came up with a few of these things you would see posted.
    hopefully some of this will strike you as funny.
    Just imagine one of those rapidly growing powerbuy threads, which keeps getting launched to the top by enthusiastic one-liners ringing the cash register. Steady supply of suckers jumping in.
    • [​IMG] "Ooh Ooh count me in too!!!"
      [​IMG] "Well, I'm still waiting for the last powerbuy to arrive in the mail, so I might as well go in on another one while I am waiting!"
      [​IMG] "I have no idea what it is, but I hear it takes 5 months or more to arrive...I'm In!!!"
      [​IMG] "Hi My names Ben...Ben Ding Meover, I have money, and lots of time to wait!!! I'm In."
      [​IMG] "Well I just wanted to say that if you are taking the time to start another powerbuy, before this one is finished, I think that is very generous of you. Thanks!"
      [​IMG] "Oops, sorry for that. My social security number is 643-45-9076. I read the instructions too fast I guess."
      [​IMG] "Hey guys, I don't think you should be rushing him. He's like an artist, these things take time. There is an exact procedure that he needs to follow to make these things."
      [​IMG] "Hey if this thing never comes it will go perfect with my other powerbuy item!"
      [​IMG] "Hi, paypal said that it can't send money to an offshore account, so you'll have to send me your swiss bank
      passcode so I can pay you."
      [​IMG] "Hey guys, I hear the extradition treaties are very good with your country, so count me in on another powerbuy dude!"
      [​IMG] "Hi there, I hope you had a good holiday with the 8K$ we sent you, here is another 10K$ just in case."
      [​IMG] "Whats Up? In case you spent the money to go half way around the world and need more to come back and finish the project, here is some more."
      [​IMG] "Hi, I figured I'd stop by your place since we live near eachother. Are you going to do another powerbuy for the widget again? here is my wallet, I'll be back in twenty minutes, I have to run home real quick and check the mail, my wife always has it waiting for me next to the bed, and if I get there at the right time I can send a letter out with the mailman, cause he's probably using the restroom."
      [​IMG] "I don't know if I'm in on this powerbuy or not, I worked for Enron for twenty years and....well what the heck, count me in too!"
      [​IMG] "I tried selecting a different color on your site, but the only one it lets me pick is 'NONE'. What kind of color is that?"
      [​IMG] "I'm definitely in. I saw the 'ALL SALES ARE FINAL' and that won me over. I hate when Realty Sales and things go into closing lawyer negotiations."
      [​IMG] "Hey guys, I just bought a new car over the internet..The pics look real sweet..Its electric and the guy said you don't even have to plug it in at night, you just replace the batteries when they lose the charge....He's sending me a remote control for it too!!! Sweet deal, 10K$ for a new car and a remote that will work with it!!!! count me in on this next round of powerbuys!"
      [​IMG] "Hello, this looks like a great deal. I'm going to send you the shipping addresses for my next of kin as well. Just in case I die before this thing arrives."
      [​IMG] "Hey I'm a state trooper and I feel kind of excited, you see I was worried when one of the guys at the station gathered all of us troopers together and gave us prostate inspections on his own time, but he said my prostate felt fine! I'll sign up with paypal right away!" (true story btw)
      [​IMG] "Can I send cash? I just don't feel comfortable giving my Visa card number out over the net...I would have to ask for a refund if somebody started charging like crazy."
      [​IMG] "Hello there, I saw your thread, can you set direct payment up out of my paycheck....I like to get screwed automatically without knowing it."
      [​IMG] "Count me in, and if you need any help let me know, I just got out of prison."
      [​IMG] "I don't know if I can get in on this one or not, I'm thinking of getting my wife pregnant and I don't want the widget to be delivered at the same time as the kid.."
      [​IMG] "OK, I am about ready to send payment. One question though. How much is shipping going to cost from Neverneverland to my Home Town?"
      [​IMG] "Hi there, can you send me time-lapsed photography so it looks like you are doing something?"
      [​IMG] "I'm sending 10$ for you today. I heard about how your miniature replica of an assembly line got stepped on by your two year old.. Hopefully you can rebuild it and send us some more pics on your progress with the widget runs."
      [​IMG] "Tell you what guys, I'm going to buy this round of powerbuys for everyone...Its On Me... I just got this letter in the mail that says I am a Certifiable Quranteed BOULLIONAIRE!!! can you believe it?"
      [​IMG] "Oooh, I received this very nice sign-up package from you today. Looks great. How come you want us to use the included Eraser-Mate to sign our checks?"
      [​IMG] "I was kind of reluctant at first, but since you posted your real name, sounds safe to me. I'm sending payment."
      [​IMG] "Hi there the widget sounds like a sweet deal..By the way, I am an Investment Advisor, so if you need any help making interest off of our money, just let me know."
      [​IMG] "Hey I saw you on the news. Ouch! If we bail you out, you think you could finish the project?"
      [​IMG] "Count me in. And because you're cool, I'm going to write 'Gift' on my check so that you can workaround your tax audits."
      [​IMG] "I'm not buying in until I see pictures first. I need proof before I throw my money around."
      [​IMG] "Hey, I think you shouldn't let your teenagers use your email account. I keep trying to contact you to check on the progress, and all that comes back are things like 'Bug Off Loser', 'Screw You', and 'SUCKER!!!'. Let me know please."
      [​IMG] "Well, I'm not sure, but I think one of these times I'll be able to actually sue someone...count me in."
      [​IMG] "Hey Guys, its ok, I checked with the Better Business Bureau and they haven't heard anything about this company"
      [​IMG] "Hello, if I call you on the phone, can you put my widget on, so I can tell for sure if it is still alive?"
      [​IMG] "Great, I got the letter update you mailed me, and I have sent my additional payment to cover your un-anticipated costs. Where did you find all the different magazines to cut the letters and words out of. Very artisitic!!"
      [​IMG] "Got your update in the mail today. Why does every page have a stamp that says 'Read by Warden' on it?"
      [​IMG] "Do I make the check out to 'John Doe' or 'Acme Incorporated'? It was a little unclear from the instructions you posted."
      [​IMG] "Dude, you might want to find a lawyer. My little girl just found one of your designs in the Cereal Box. You should sue them for copyright infringements."
      [​IMG] "Guys, calm down. He's anonymous only because he doesn't want the IRS to contact him. I sent payment."
      [​IMG] "Hi, I am a former customer. This company is great. The products are revolutional and of very high value. I love it. It is great. I would rate them 5 stars."
      [​IMG] "Instead of an ICQ number, could you post your email as well? I'm holding back until I see that."
      [​IMG] "Hey, the bank called to let me know about you changing the amount on the check to include two more zeros. Next time just let me know I made a mistake and I'll send you another check. Sorry about that."
      [​IMG] "HEY EVERYONE I GOT MY WIDGET TODAY!!!! WOOO HOOO. I admit that it has taken a long time to arrive, but it looks sweet!!! The only bad thing is that all of the Screws on my satelite receiver are rusted on now, and I can't get in to install the widget."
    [​IMG] :b
  2. Hugh M

    Hugh M Second Unit

    Dec 31, 2001
    Likes Received:
    sorry, I should have warned that it was a long post.

    I added a bunch just now, not in order though.
  3. DaveF

    DaveF Moderator

    Mar 4, 2001
    Likes Received:
    One Loudoun, Ashburn, VA
    Real Name:
    David Fischer
    Out of curiosity, what's a "powerbuy"?
  4. Hugh M

    Hugh M Second Unit

    Dec 31, 2001
    Likes Received:
    I would say a powerbuy is when a group of people, mostly on the web, get together to purchase something.

    in the context of this thread it is something that isn't otherwise available for purchasing, something that perhaps is made to order.

    so "powerbuy thread" would mean where someone says "hey lets get a projector lens" "custom made" and then everyone chips in to the guy who is willing to make it.

    unfortunately I would guess that people have lost money in some of these powerbuys in the past.

    just thought there might be some of those people around who would understand. Because I had this mostly laying around, for friends who are familiar with powerbuys.

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