Directors The Ripoff/Sequel "Uncool" Tournament

Bill Williams

Screenwriter
Joined
May 28, 2003
Messages
1,697
Sumo wrestlers in thongs.

Urkel in a thong.

Jabba the Hutt in a thong.

Teenagers running their mouths off during an entire 2-hour movie, making smart-ass MST3K comments during the entire film. (This actually happened when I went to see "X-Men 2" last year. Thank goodness for DVDs!)

Smoking in movie theaters.

Co-workers who conduct all of their personal business and conversations, none of it pertaining to you, in your cubicle.
 

SteveGon

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Dec 11, 2000
Messages
12,251
Real Name
Steve Gonzales
Okay, we're all set. I've left out a few of the more recent autos for either being redundant or not in the spirit of the tourney (death; sorry, Chucky).



Round 1 - Bracket 1

Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father

vs.

Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out she's old enough to be your mother


Round 1 - Bracket 2

Plantar's Warts

vs.

Migraines
 

Chucky P

Supporting Actor
Joined
Jul 15, 2001
Messages
766
Location
Mound, MN
Real Name
Charles Paulsen
Sorry Steve, I did not mean to be a killjoy.

Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father

Migraines
 

george kaplan

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Mar 14, 2001
Messages
13,063
Lew,

The uncool part isn't having the lustful thoughts, it's finding out the bad news associated with it.


I'm old enough that a girl could be young enough to be my daughter, but still old enough, but I'm also old enough that any woman as old as my mother is too old.

Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out she's old enough to be your mother

Migraines
- I get these and they're definitely uncool.
 

Philip_T

Supporting Actor
Joined
Jun 28, 2002
Messages
876
I think the 1st part depends on your age(as George diagrams above). Being 34, if a girl was young enough to be my daughter, that would put her right around 16 or younger. If she was old enough to be my mother, she would be around 52 or older. Since 16 isn't even legal, I'm gonna have to vote Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father as the uncooler of the 2.

I've actually had a migraine once and it felt way below average so my vote would sway that way.
 

Mike Hutman

Supporting Actor
Joined
Apr 1, 2002
Messages
895
Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father

Migraines
 

Lew Crippen

Senior HTF Member
Joined
May 19, 2002
Messages
12,060

I’m in that category now too George.

But I also considered when I was twenty-something and had lustful thoughts about some who were old enough—but not too old.
 

Nick Sievers

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Jul 1, 2000
Messages
3,481
Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father

- I'm 22 so this is just wrong. Plus I don't mind the hot older women.


Migraines
 

Rob P S

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Mar 22, 2002
Messages
2,004
Real Name
rob
Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father

Migraines
 

Andrew_Sch

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Dec 30, 2001
Messages
2,153
At 18, a 35-year-old could technically be my mother, and if I was a father, the kid couldn't be any older than about 4, so I guess I'll abstain.

Migraines-My mom has them real bad, so I know second-hand how uncool they are.
 

Mark Shannon

Screenwriter
Joined
May 27, 2002
Messages
1,991
Heh, Steve. You put two of my nominations up against each other.


Anyways, Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out she's old enough to be your mother

Migrains - Used to have them quite often, but now that I've discovered what was causing them, I rarely have them. Nonetheless, definitely uncool.
 

Brad Porter

Screenwriter
Joined
Jun 8, 1999
Messages
1,757
Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out you're old enough to be her father I don't have any medical testing results, but I'd guess that my sperm was viable for fertilization between the ages of 12 or 13. Therefore, my theoretical limit for "old enough to be her father" would be a nubile, frolicking 20 year old college coed. There's nothing at all uncool about having lustful thoughts about her. I just have to stay at least 50 yards away.

vs.

Having lustful thoughts about a hot chick and then finding out she's old enough to be your mother Hmmmmm. We're looking at the 45-55 range here, so I'm thinking of Frances McDormand, Kathleen Turner, Isabella Rossellini, Lena Olin, Geena Davis, etc. Any lustful thoughts that I experience with these women are generally from their older work when they were several years younger. Some of them are beginning to resemble drag queens these days (Ms. Turner, I'm gesturing in your direction.) This one is definately the more uncool of the two choices.

Round 1 - Bracket 2

Plantar's Warts I bought the variety snack pack tin thing and I swear there were three warts for every single macadamia nut.
I had one of these. It didn't hurt. It was just annoying.

vs.

Migraines Haven't had one, but there have been times when my fantasy football players have turned in poor performances because they were suffering from one of these. That's not cool. This one is probably the more uncool of the two choices.

Brad
 

SteveGon

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Dec 11, 2000
Messages
12,251
Real Name
Steve Gonzales
Having lustful thoughts...to be her father wins.
Migraines wins.


Round 1 - Bracket 3

Being forced to listen to the local Top 40 radio station at work for hours on end

vs.

Cops hiding behind the bushes/under an overpass for speeding violators


Round 1 - Bracket 4

Buying a soda and having it explode when you open it

vs.

the morning after you eat really spicy food
 

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