Garrett Lundy
Senior HTF Member
- Joined
- Mar 5, 2002
- Messages
- 3,763
Recently I find the trailer to the new video-game inspired action/horror film Alone in the Dark. And its directed by Uwe Boll! The director who's previous movie House of the Dead should have nominated him for a lifetime judicial order barring him from coming withing 500 yards of a camera.
Now I know that I should be more reasonable and give the guy a second chance, and maybe this film will be of acceptible quality. But then I think back to the horrors of HOTD (The WORST film ever given a theatrical release IMHO), and simply cannot believe this movie is even going to be watchable.
WHY DID I MAKE THIS THREAD?
First, I wanted to be the first in line to warn you all "This is made by the maker of the worst film ever" and that you shouldn't waste your money on a ticket. But Also I wanted to bring you my idea for : Alone in the Dark, The drinking game!
*Camera closeup on actor so tight his/her breathing fogs-up the lens: Take a drink.
*Character in movie "disappears" from scene : take two drinks.
*Film getting intercut with relevant videogame footage: Take drink/per shot
*Film getting intercut with irrelevant videogame footage: Take 2 drinks/per shot
*Visible wires or springboard: Drink
*Characters suddenly walk through walls, suffers from "polygon breakup", or camera films something away from the action to better re-create the feel of the videogame rink till theres only one left standing!
BONUS DVD Drinking Game!
*Enable the directors commentary and drink for every occassion he says "That was good" despite the reality of the situation.
*Punch person next to you (on the arm), everytime director says "Um...Yeah" because even he can't explain what just happened.
Now I know that I should be more reasonable and give the guy a second chance, and maybe this film will be of acceptible quality. But then I think back to the horrors of HOTD (The WORST film ever given a theatrical release IMHO), and simply cannot believe this movie is even going to be watchable.
WHY DID I MAKE THIS THREAD?
First, I wanted to be the first in line to warn you all "This is made by the maker of the worst film ever" and that you shouldn't waste your money on a ticket. But Also I wanted to bring you my idea for : Alone in the Dark, The drinking game!
*Camera closeup on actor so tight his/her breathing fogs-up the lens: Take a drink.
*Character in movie "disappears" from scene : take two drinks.
*Film getting intercut with relevant videogame footage: Take drink/per shot
*Film getting intercut with irrelevant videogame footage: Take 2 drinks/per shot
*Visible wires or springboard: Drink
*Characters suddenly walk through walls, suffers from "polygon breakup", or camera films something away from the action to better re-create the feel of the videogame rink till theres only one left standing!
BONUS DVD Drinking Game!
*Enable the directors commentary and drink for every occassion he says "That was good" despite the reality of the situation.
*Punch person next to you (on the arm), everytime director says "Um...Yeah" because even he can't explain what just happened.