Here are my quotes!
Bart (singing to the tune of the overture from "Carmen): Toreador, oh don't spit on the floor, use a cuspidor, that's what it's for.
Krusty (upset): Is it a crime to bet on sporting events?
Judge: Yes it is!
Animatronic Children (singing): Duff beer for me, Duff beer for you, I'll have a Duff, you have one too. (repeat until threatened)
Groundskeeper Willy (singing "Downtown" [badly]): When you're alone and life is making you lonely, ye can always go, ACCH! Doontoon!
Jasper (bearded old man, singing): Theme...from "A Summer Place"...from "A Summer Place," the theme...from "A Summer Place"...it's the theme-e-e-e-e-e-e-e!
Gravedigger: Isn't anyone in this dadgum cemetery dead?
Hans Moleman (in coffin): I wasn't going to make a fuss, but now that you mentioned it...
Apu: A Mounds bar is not a sprinkle. A Twizzler is not a sprinkle. A jolly rancher is not a sprinkle. Maybe in Shangri-La they are but not here, sir.
Bart: Hello, I'm Dr. Hibbert. I'm afraid we'll have to amputate...your butt.
Homer (singing to the tune of "Sailing, Sailing"): Stealing, stealing, stealing a car for Moe, da-da-da-DA-dada-dada, insurance fraud today, hey!
Ralph: I can't believe we ate a whole wedding cake.
Bart: And an entire plate of funeral fudge.
Homer: You said to me you should quit my job and become an inventor or you'd torch the house.
Homer: Ah, the sea forgives all. Not like those mean old mountains. I hate them so much!
Joan Rivers: Help me! My daughter's not talented!
Dr. Hibbert: Why do we live in a town where the smart people have no power and stupid people run everything? Maybe I should just move back to Alabama.
Woody Allen (doing a Japanese commercial): Hi. So many rice crackers claim to be low-cal, but only Fujikawa brand rice crackers make your interiors go bananas. What did I do to deserve...oh, right.
Homer: At least the Jimmy Stewart version [of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington] had the giant rabbit who ran the Savings and Loan.
A sign at the movie studio gates:
POLYSTAR PICTURES
No artistic integrity allowed beyond this point.
Dick Clark (at start of year 2000 panic): Oh no! It's happening! (Melts)
Movie credit:
Voice of Magic Taco: JAMES EARL JONES
Ron Howard's son: Daddy, stop talking to that bomb!
Apu: Our children will have a traditional zoo-ish upbringing!
Employer: I'm sorry, Gary, we don't need you anymore.
Gary Coleman: Whatchoo talkin' about, lady?
His employer: Ha ha, that's so adorable. You're rehired.
GC: Sucker! I knew exactly what she was talking about!
(Cletus and Brandine, a redneck couple, are kissing in a truck)
Brandine: Aw Cletus! Why'd yew have to park by mah parents?
Cletus: Now, now, Brandine, they'z mah parents too!
(a redneck on a roof plays the "da-da-DA-dada-Duh" musical cue from Laugh-In on the banjo)
A banner reading:
DUFF™ DAYS
A lost weekend for the entire family!
Comic Book Guy: Shoo, nerds, shoo!
Ozzy Osbourne: Right. And the award for best hardcore thrash metal goes to...Simpsons Christmas Boogie? (bites off Grammy's head and spits it out)
Thank you, come again!
Bart (singing to the tune of the overture from "Carmen): Toreador, oh don't spit on the floor, use a cuspidor, that's what it's for.
Krusty (upset): Is it a crime to bet on sporting events?
Judge: Yes it is!
Animatronic Children (singing): Duff beer for me, Duff beer for you, I'll have a Duff, you have one too. (repeat until threatened)
Groundskeeper Willy (singing "Downtown" [badly]): When you're alone and life is making you lonely, ye can always go, ACCH! Doontoon!
Jasper (bearded old man, singing): Theme...from "A Summer Place"...from "A Summer Place," the theme...from "A Summer Place"...it's the theme-e-e-e-e-e-e-e!
Gravedigger: Isn't anyone in this dadgum cemetery dead?
Hans Moleman (in coffin): I wasn't going to make a fuss, but now that you mentioned it...
Apu: A Mounds bar is not a sprinkle. A Twizzler is not a sprinkle. A jolly rancher is not a sprinkle. Maybe in Shangri-La they are but not here, sir.
Bart: Hello, I'm Dr. Hibbert. I'm afraid we'll have to amputate...your butt.
Homer (singing to the tune of "Sailing, Sailing"): Stealing, stealing, stealing a car for Moe, da-da-da-DA-dada-dada, insurance fraud today, hey!
Ralph: I can't believe we ate a whole wedding cake.
Bart: And an entire plate of funeral fudge.
Homer: You said to me you should quit my job and become an inventor or you'd torch the house.
Homer: Ah, the sea forgives all. Not like those mean old mountains. I hate them so much!
Joan Rivers: Help me! My daughter's not talented!
Dr. Hibbert: Why do we live in a town where the smart people have no power and stupid people run everything? Maybe I should just move back to Alabama.
Woody Allen (doing a Japanese commercial): Hi. So many rice crackers claim to be low-cal, but only Fujikawa brand rice crackers make your interiors go bananas. What did I do to deserve...oh, right.
Homer: At least the Jimmy Stewart version [of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington] had the giant rabbit who ran the Savings and Loan.
A sign at the movie studio gates:
POLYSTAR PICTURES
No artistic integrity allowed beyond this point.
Dick Clark (at start of year 2000 panic): Oh no! It's happening! (Melts)
Movie credit:
Voice of Magic Taco: JAMES EARL JONES
Ron Howard's son: Daddy, stop talking to that bomb!
Apu: Our children will have a traditional zoo-ish upbringing!
Employer: I'm sorry, Gary, we don't need you anymore.
Gary Coleman: Whatchoo talkin' about, lady?
His employer: Ha ha, that's so adorable. You're rehired.
GC: Sucker! I knew exactly what she was talking about!
(Cletus and Brandine, a redneck couple, are kissing in a truck)
Brandine: Aw Cletus! Why'd yew have to park by mah parents?
Cletus: Now, now, Brandine, they'z mah parents too!
(a redneck on a roof plays the "da-da-DA-dada-Duh" musical cue from Laugh-In on the banjo)
A banner reading:
DUFF™ DAYS
A lost weekend for the entire family!
Comic Book Guy: Shoo, nerds, shoo!
Ozzy Osbourne: Right. And the award for best hardcore thrash metal goes to...Simpsons Christmas Boogie? (bites off Grammy's head and spits it out)
Thank you, come again!
