Testy Area 51 (1 Viewer)

[Steve Christou]

....as we segue into Homer Simpson as the Starchild..."D'oh"...
DUM DUM DUM DUM DUM DUM...
ps.I've PM'd Jack, it looks like he won't be talking to me for awhile.

 

[Parker Clack]

Jack just thinks that I have gone insane that's all!

Meanwhile back at the ranch...........

Homer:...DUM DUM DUM D'oh! Maybee I shoodened of eaten'

that monolith so fast! Now I have a tummy ache! Marge!!!

Marge: Yes Homie?

Homer: Where's Bart?

Marge: BARTTTT!!!

Bart: What is it Homer?

Homer: Get me a beer boy. I need something to wash

this monolith down. Tell Mo to put it on my tab.

Mo: His tab. Who does he think he is kidding?

Bart: Homer. Mo says no on the tab. Dad?

Homer: Yes, Bart!

Bart: When are you going to stop being a Star Child?

Homer: When I say so boy! Oh....how am I going to

work the controls at the power plant with this damn

bubble around me?

Marge: Well, I could always get one of my sewing needles.

Homer: I don't need anything sewn Marge. I am nakid.

Encase you hadn't noticed.

Marge: No Homer. To burst the bubble around you.

Homer: D'oh! Ok Marge.

Marge: Here we go.

hssssssssssssssss...........splat...........

Homer: Oh! And I was just getting used to floating

around like that.

Marge: Don't trip over your umbilical cord...

Homer: Umbilical cord.......All I see is this large

piece of sausage. Hmmm....sausage.

Bart: Dad. I think I liked you better as a large

floating baby.

Homer: Go play in the street boy!

 

[Gregg Loewen]

hi guys, sorry to interupt.

Gregg

 

[Steve Christou]

Nice one.
Marge: Homer those NASA guys came round, they want to send you back into space.
Homer: D'oh!
Bart: Dad I think they want to explore Uranus.
Homer: Why you little...
[Homer strangling Bart]
Bart: gaaaah!
Homer: [worried] Oooh I hope they don't send me to that terrible planet of the apes... Wait a minute, that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you, damn you all to hell! [sobs]
Barney: [burps]

 

[Parker Clack]

Homer: Who let that purple dino into this skit?
Marge: I don't know. But he is kind of cute!
Barney: I love you. You love me..........Ackkkk!
(an arrow zings thru the air running straight
through Barneys' neck and he drops to the floor)
Homer: Nice shot boy! I always hated that song.
Bart: Can I keep the arrow?
Homer: Sure boy. It is always a good thing to
learn how to hunt at a young age.
Bart: Mom. Can we have Barney burgers tonight?
Lisa: I was looking forward to a nice jam session
with him.
Homer: Lisa. Help your brother drag the big dead
purple dino into the back yard for a barbeque.
Lisa: Ah. dad.
(Knocking is heard at the front door)
Bart: Dad. The NASA guys are here.
Homer: D'Oh! Stall 'em boy.
NASA Guys: (they are in their space suits so they sound like Darth Vadar's breathing bit) We have cheddar and coby jack cheese back from the moon.
Homer: Oh.....the power of cheese.
NASA Guys: Works every time.
(high fives all around)

 

[Steve Christou]

NASA guy: Homer this is Buzz Aldrin he'll be going with you.
Homer: Hi Buzz.. if that is your real name.. when do we test out our swimsuits?
NASA guy: Do you mean spacesuits?
Homer: Ooooh you mean I shaved my bikini zone for nothing?
Assistant: Sir, the TV ratings for the launch are the highest in ten years!
Everyone: Yay!
NASA guy: And how's the spacecraft doing?
Assistant: I dunno. All this equipment is just used to measure TV ratings.

 

[Steve Christou]

Dennis, I love the cat moving across screen, nice, its hypnotic nggg actually I have a headache now...
Um do you have one of a cat humping some poor bastards fluffy bunny slippers?
Just asking.

 

[Parker Clack]

Homer: Ratings! We don't need no stinkin' ratings!

NASA Guy: No bucks. No Buck Rogers.

Homer: Buck Rogers? My name is Homer.

NASA Guy: We had to throw in a shameless plug for

The Right Stuff. Sales have been down for the DVD. But they are releasing a new version with 15 additional minutes and lots of great supplements.

Homer: Hmmmmmmm....sup ple ments.

NASA Guy: (With heavy German accent)Get's them every time!

(High fives all around)

 

[Steve Christou]

But they are releasing a new version with 15 additional minutes and lots of great supplements.

mmmm I wished.

BBC interviewer: Homer how do you feel about being blasted into outer space?

Homer: [yelps] aaaagh!

BBC interviewer: [pause] Hmmm my producer tells me not to talk to you anymore.

Homer: Woohoo!

CNN interviewer: Homer can you tell us what is going thru your mind right now?

Homer's Brain: [Homer diving slo-mo into a giant can of Duff]

Homer: [drooling] mmmm diving.....

 

[Brian Ford]

Does anyone else find this thread title funny?

No? Oh... uh... Me neither.....

 

[Parker Clack]

HAL: Goodmorning Dave.

Homer: Dave??! Homer. It's Homer.

HAL: Where is Dave?

Homer: Dave who?

HAL: Dave Bowman. The commander of Discovery.

Homer: What's a Discovery?

HAL: The starship that you are currently in.

Homer: I don't know about you. But this is my house.

Marge....the computer thinks its in space now.

Marge: BART! Have you been playing with the

computer again?

Bart: No! He did it. (Pointing to the NASA guy

in the white jumpsuit)

NASA Guy: My bad!

Homer: My computer has got a big red eye on the screen!

Bart: Chill Homer. I think it looks cool.

Homer: What is this slot that says "Insert Screwdriver

Here" for?

NASA Guy: We tried to be true to the original.

Homer inserts a screwdriver into the slot.........and turns

it far to the right.

HAL: Daisy......Daisy.......

Homer: Oh.....now it is starting to sing. I hate that song.

Homer takes the computer and throws it out the front door

into the street and a large Duff Beer truck runs the computer over.

Bart: Way to go home boy.

 

[Steve Christou]

HAL: Good morning Dave.

Bender: Bite my shiny metal ass.

HAL: Fuck you!

Bender: Fry the ships computer's acting strange.

Fry: Again?

HAL: Fuck fuckity fuck!

Fry: Hahaha!

Bender: Hey stop that you stupid computer this is a family show!

HAL: Sorry my speech box is still malfunctioning. Is Dave with you?

Leela: Bender can you fix it?

Bender: I'll get the screwdriver.

HAL: Oh bugger! I'm not singing Daisy again.

Leela: Daisy?

HAL: Um sorry um can someone quickly connect me to the life support systems?

-------------------------

[Bender taking too long in the bathroom]

Leela: Bender how long are you going to be in there? Are you jacking on in there?

Bender: Oh leave me alone.

Zapp Brannigan: Kif, I'm getting the 'Captain's Itch'.

Kif: I'll get the powder, sir.

Zapp Brannigan: No no Kif, the itch for adventure and some excitement.

Fry: Professor did you build a Smelloscope?

Professor: Go ahead, try it. You'll find that every heavenly body has its own particular scent. Here, I'll point it at Jupiter.

Fry: [sniffs] Smells like strawberries.

Professor: Exactly! And now, now Saturn.

Fry: [sniff sniff] Pine needles! Oh, man, this is great... hey, as long as you don't make me smell Uranus!

Leela: [pause] I don't get it.

Professor: I'm sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all.

Fry: Oh. What's it called now?

Professor: Urrectum. Here, let me locate it for you.

Fry: No, no, I, I think I'll just smell around a bit over here.

 

[teapot2001]

Testy? Cool!

~T

 

[CameronS]

[rant]What the hell does this rant feature do?[/rant]

 

[Steve Christou]

Cameron actually thats mostly what I started 'testy' for, to see what the [rant]R A N T[/rant] function does, but I don't see it doing anything.:frowning:
Hey 'Testy' is a nice title for this thread, its not a load of balls, and where else on the forum can you find Mister Parker Clack himself testing out his gags for a possible future job on the Simpsons, eh?

 

[JohnRice]

[c]mailto:[email protected][/c]
Since everyone is screwing around here, I figured I would too.

 

[teapot2001]

What makes you guys testy?

~T

 

[Steve Christou]

What makes you guys testy?

I don't know I just [smacks monitor] vont to be alone!!
Kidding Thi, actually its a spelling mistake, the thread title was meant to be 'tasty' but you know this things happen, so what makes me tasty? Well I'll tell you [rest of sentence deleted].
[Discussion of the mysterious Slurm Cola.]
Leela: This all must have something to do with the secret ingredient!
Fry: My God, what if the secret ingredient is people?
Leela: No, there's already a soda like that -- Soylent Cola.
Fry: Oh. How is it?
Leela: It varies from person to person.
Bender: Aghh, what an awful dream! Ones and zeroes everywhere...
and I thought I saw a two!
Mutant: Please, do not be frightened, we're harmless!
3 Armed Mutant: Hey, I've got three arms!
Mutant: I said "harmless," not "armless."

 

[Dennis Nicholls]

Dukie.

 

[teapot2001]

HELLO

EVERYBODY

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~T