"Sophisticated": a story about widescreen (1 Viewer)

[Peter Kline]

Brian,

Indeed. In New York City there's a bar on every block.

 

[Ron-P]

The Lord's (DVD) Prayer
Our Father, who art in heaven, Hallowed be OAR.
Thy Widescreen come.
Thy Widescreen be done, On DVD as it is in heaven.
Give us this Widescreen on our daily DVD.
And forgive the Joe6pack Pan-n-Scanner's,
As we forgive those who Pan-n-Scan against us.
And lead us not into Pan-n-Scan,
But deliver us from Pan-n-Scan.
For thine is the kingdom of OAR,
and the power of the HTF,
and the glory of Black Bars,
for ever and ever.
Amen.
Peace Out~

 

[DaViD Boulet]

Dudes you have my *utterly* in TEARS! (laughing).

yes, I too have been blessed by this thread.

Some recent dead sea scroll interpretations have shed some light on some familiar versus. Here are the most recent translations:

The Lord is my Director,
I shall not want his films butchared for home-video.
He maketh me to lie down edge-enhancement,
He Leadeth me to buy a 16x9 display,
He restore-eth classic films for preservation,
Yeah though I walk through the valley of shadow of Walmart,
I shall fear no Pan-and-Scan pushing salesperson,
For Thou art with Me.
Thy commentary and special editions they comfort me.
Thou preparest 16x9 1080P HD masters in the presence of my enemies.
My DVD play-time runneth over on multiple disc to maintain picture quality.
Surely OAR and unfiltered DVD transfers shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever and Ever,
Amen.


And a woman was about to be stoned by Home Theater zealouts for advocating P/S videos. And Christ said "He who has never watched a non-OAR transfer...INLCUDING early DVD releases like Chariots of Fire and A Christmas Story, cast the first stone." No HTFer cast any stone for they new that despite their staunch OAR positions each of them had secretly watch A Christmas Story open-matte without telling anyone because they love the movie so much. And Jesus said to the woman "Go, and sin no more".

And God said to Noah, "I will destroy the world and all of mankind for their pan-and-scan wickedness. Build yourself an arc, make it 16 cubits by 9 cubits high, 1920 by 1080 cubits wide, and take 7 of every clean DVD free from excessive compression noise and EE ringing, and 2 of every unclean OAR DVD, and will send the floods to destroy the world, but you and your OAR-loving family I will keep safe."

 

[Nestor Vargas]

This thread made my day

 

[Tony-B]

That is one of the best stories I have ever heard. Tell your priest that he is the greatest.

 

[Brenton]

you guys are great...