Okay, it's probably too early to be thinking of the Oscars, but I've something to ask

Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by John Kilduff, Apr 17, 2002.

  1. John Kilduff

    John Kilduff Screenwriter

    Oct 27, 2001
    Likes Received:
    Okay, here's the hypothetical situation:

    The Academy Of Motion Picture Arts And Sciences is looking for somebody to produce the next Oscar ceremony...come up with a theme (if desired), pick presenters, choose host(s), decide on between-awards entertainment, and so forth. A decision is made...YOU have been chosen to produce the Oscars. All the decisions rest in your hands now...what will you do?

    Me, here's what I do:

    The writing team would be headed up by Tina Fey and Kevin Smith, and members of the team would include Sherri Stoner, Deanna Oliver, Paul Rugg (those first 3 having been chosen by me for their movie jokes that they contributed to the Warner Brothers TV animation of the 90s), John Cleese, Eric Idle, the team of Zucker/Abrahams/Zucker, Savage Steve Holland and a special mystery writer who will do his own material and help co-host the ceremony.

    The hosts: I would return to the multiple host format. For the first quarter of the awards, Cleese and Idle are the hosts. The second quarter is hosted by Fey and Dennis Miller. The third quarter is hosted by John and Joan Cusack. The fourth quarter...I bring in the big guns and out comes JOHNNY CARSON, to make a return appearance and bring some class to the final part.

    Presenters would be matched up in a unique way: Ask anybody who knows me, and they'll tell you I'm an 80s fanatic. My idea is to pair up stars of the modern-day with people who gained their greatest movie fame in the 80s. Example: Best Achievement in Make-Up is presented by Eddie Murphy, star across two decades, and Kelly LeBrock, star of the 80s. You can get the picture from there.

    In-between awards entertainment: I would hire a quartet of singers to perform a medley entitled "Oscar's Only Human, Chapter 2: We Have More Proof"...a medley of eligible movie songs from the past quarter-century that failed to get Oscar nominations. The performers: Pink, Pat Benatar, Luther Vandross and Jackson Browne.

    Also, I would have a fashion show highlighting over-the-top clothing from 40 years of movies, set to the song "So Hip It Hurts" by ABC.

    That, my friends, is only part of the Oscar ceremony you would see if I was the producer. Let me know of other things I could fill in, and remember the question...

    They've picked you to produce the Oscars...What will YOU do?


    John "Is obsessed year-round with the Oscars" Kilduff
  2. Richard WWW

    Richard WWW Stunt Coordinator

    Apr 7, 2002
    Likes Received:
    You are a nut. An entertaining nut, but a nut nonetheless.[​IMG]
  3. MichaelAW

    MichaelAW Second Unit

    Apr 14, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Two words:

    Uma. Oprah.
  4. Chris

    Chris Lead Actor

    Jul 4, 1997
    Likes Received:
    Actually, word in the trade magazines a few weeks ago was that they made an offer to Johny, and had also considered a few others outside the norm..
  5. Patrick McCart

    Patrick McCart Lead Actor

    May 16, 2001
    Likes Received:
    Georgia (the state)
    Real Name:
    Patrick McCart
    I'd get it to be a show themed on The Great Train Robbery since it'll be celebrating its 100th anniv. next year.
  6. Janna S

    Janna S Second Unit

    Feb 17, 2001
    Likes Received:
    My oscar wish list has just one thing on it: Eddie Izzard.

Share This Page