The grandkids went home early yesterday morning so I had a very productive movie watching day:
A pre-built double-feature featuring
Planet Terror and
Death Proof along with fake movie trailers made by several directors.
I've seen
Planet Terror before. An experimental bio weapon is released turning thousands into zombie like creatures. A stripper, her shady mechanic ex-boyfriend, a strong-willed doctor, the local sheriff, and an assortment of various people must join forces to survive the night. Cherry, the stripper (Rose McGowan), loses a leg so they rig up a machine gun prosthesis. You *need* to see her battle flesh eating zombies with the appendage. It's a very fun film.
Death Proof was a first time viewing. The first third is a bit of a snooze as we meet Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell) who builds "death proof" cars to stalk people and murder them. We see a trio of girls in a bar and Stuntman Mike picks up a 4th, offering her a ride home. She doesn't go home... Mike survives the crash (the car is "death proof only if you're in the driver's seat" he tells the 4th) and stalks another trio. But this trio isn't the "helpless babe" type... The last act, where he goes after the 2nd trio, is a very well done chase/crash sequence and lots of fun. You just have to make it past the first half of the film.
EDIT: I forgot to add that these are full blown crap theater versions complete with scratches, dirt, flecks, jumping edits, burned out sections (with appropriate "Sorry" cards from "management"). I've read that people left the theater after seeing
Planet Terror and the "intermission" began because they thought that was it when it's a full imitation of a double-feature Saturday at your local run down theater. It's a real fun way to watch the pair.
Another first time viewing. I purchased this one a couple of years back and just haven't made time for it until now. My 9yo granddaughter looks upon it with lust as it's a horror Christmas movie rated PG-13 and thinks she can watch it (I'd say "yes" after my viewing). Beware saying you don't believe in Christmas any more because the Krampus and his posse will arrive to set things right... kind of... but not in a good way...
They almost lost me in the opening scenes when the wife's sister and her family show up. They're clones of Cousin Eddy and his brood w/dog from
National Lampoon's Christmas. It improves and the visuals are quite good. The story's OK, nothing great, but a good, safe, horror film for older kids. And I felt ripped off by the ending until the camera pulls back from the "everything's OK" ending.
Alien is one of my all time favorite SF/Horror films. I own copies of every film in the franchise, even the crossovers with the Predator series. I was a bit disappointed with
Alien: Resurrection but still liked it more than any of the other films in the franchise (yes, I don't particularly like
Aliens as it's a rather generic action/horror film and not that good, psychological, haunted house stuff like
Alien). So...
Covenant is just a bit better than
Resurrection but just a smidgen better. They continue the story from
Resurrection with the crew of the colonization ship Covenant diverting to the planet after repairing a failing solar array and receiving a signal which causes them to discover the planet can support life as we know it. It's several years closer than their target so they decide to take a look. And... yes, it sets up yet another sequel.
I have a copy of this on the BR (and DVD) of
The Wax Museum I discussed earlier. I enjoy the film so purchased the new, restored, BR. Allow me to wax poetic... WOW! This restored version looks absolutely spectacular! Just to be sure, I pulled out my disc of
The Wax Museum and gave
Mystery... a quick spin. Night and day difference! If you're a fan and have been on the fence - get off!
For all practical purposes the story is identical to
The Wax Museum. There are minor differences as this one is pre-code. The alcoholic in the later film is a junkie in this one and there's a female reporter driving many of the happenings. It's just as good as the 1953 remake. I've read they used real people as the wax sculptures because the early arc lights were so hot they melted the wax sculptures they intended to use.
I'd heard of this one but never saw it. During those years I just didn't watch new horror movies as most sounded quite lame (for the most part they still do). And... it's just not that good. Native Americans in NY "warg" into wolves to kill people involved in activities which hurt the ecology. The "first person" visuals of the wolves running through/around town may have been good at the time (OK... I don't really think so) but they're nothing more than standard key techniques used in many TV productions. And they're on display for at least 1/4 of the movie - quite boring - and don't add much, if anything, to the mystique or horror.
OK... let's switch to some old favorites to finish the day...
In ancient Egypt, Kharis attempted to restore life to the dead Princess Ananka. He was discovered, had his tongue cut out, and was condemned to be buried alive. Sacred tana leaves are buried with him. A priest is assigned to watch him and during the cycle of the full moon give Kharis fluid from the brew of three tana leaves to keep him alive. Should anyone enter the tomb of the Princess he's to be given a fluid of nine leaves will provide movement and allow the priest to send him to take vengeance on the trespassers. Of course a pair of archiologists defile the tomb and suffer the vengeance of Kharis.
This is one of the better sequels to
The Mummy. In spite of that I just don't get why, like with traditional zombies, people don't just run from Kharis and throw some combustable on him and set it alight. OK... that's the main argument with most (all?) of the mummy films. They're still quite fun with all the mumbo-jumbo about Ra and the old Egyptian Gods just adding to the overall fun time.
Thirty years after the conclusion of
The Mummy's Hand, in the fictional town of Mapleton, Massachusetts, Steve Banning recounts the story of Kharis to his family and evening guests in his home. This device uses flashbacks to tell the entirety of
The Mummy's Hand (using footage from that film), eating up a good 20+ minutes of the run time. We then see another explanation from a priest of how Tana leaves work after which Kharis is relocated to MA by his new "caretaker," Mehemet Bey (Turhan Bey), to finish the failed job of 30 years earlier. More mummy mayhem ensues with a not so good ending for Kharis. Another exciting entry in the mummy mythos.
In the 3rd, and last, sequel to
The Mummy's Hand, the Southern Engineering Company is attempting to drain the local swamp but the efforts are being hampered by the superstitions of the workers, who believe the area to be haunted by the mummy and his bride. Once again we get a lesson on how to properly administer tana leaf brew. Wait! Just how did Kharis get burried in a LA swamp!?! Didn't he get burned up real good in the last film!?! AND... how did the mummy of Ananka get there too!?! Who cares? It's more fun with mummy and the locals aren't happy as Ananka gets revived and wanders about looking for Kharis, who is also looking for her. Gotta love tana leaves!
This mummy trilogy is what Hammer adapted for their take on the mummy (
The Mummy -1959) and why, when I first saw that one, I thought I'd seen it all before but things were different but the same. It took several viewings of all 4 of those films before I figured out what was going on (this was pre-internet days when looking it up wasn't so easy).
Yes, it was a productive day and more like what I normally get in on a Saturday or Sunday.
