I really *HATE* grasshoppers!!!

Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by Inspector Hammer!, Oct 3, 2002.

  1. Inspector Hammer!

    Inspector Hammer! Executive Producer

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    Did you ever see a human go from a relaxed lying position to a fear induced, panic stricken standing position in a fraction of a second?

    Welp, you would have if you had been in my house about half an hour ago. I only wish that Guinness had been their to see it.

    I have a small tree that grows outside my window that I have to occasionally rip down and it reaches all the way up to my AC, and what happens is grasshoppers hang out on that tree and sometimes one gets inside the vents of my AC, works it's way through all the machinery inside and POP, into my room it springs.

    The one I killed tonight was at least 3" long and could jump like Michael Jordan on a trampalene! I played hell trying to get it to stay in one spot long enough to kill it!

    It was actually something to see, I was swatting at it like King Kong on top of the Empire state building! Finally I hit it and sent the little bastard screaming mayday to the floor before I smashed it with my shoe and gave it a proper burial down the toilet.

    That tree is history tommorrow.

    Ugly winged vermon! Uggh!
     
  2. TonyD

    TonyD Who do we think I am?
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    john why are you afraid of grasshoppers?

    or do you mean they just skeeve you out.
    cause i don't see being afraid of them. they dont do anything, they don't bite. they just hop around.

    my house haas crickets and grasshoppers in it all the time. we just pick them up and throw them outside.

    they eat other bugs that are damaging to things in the garden, and elsewere in the yard.

    you could just put a cup over it, slide a piece of paper under it then take it out.
     
  3. Inspector Hammer!

    Inspector Hammer! Executive Producer

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    It's a phobia of mine, I can't control it, it's just this irrational reaction I have to insects of any sort.

    They're just so freakin ugly!
     
  4. Steve Christou

    Steve Christou Long Member

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    John if its any help I saw a program on tv a few months ago and it was about insects being good enough to eat...
    Well anyway there was this Frenchman on the show and he was holding a big live grasshopper between two fingers and [John stops reading about here] he plopped it in his mouth and ... well you won't believe how quickly I grabbed the remote and switched over.[​IMG]
     
  5. Inspector Hammer!

    Inspector Hammer! Executive Producer

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    [John didn't stop reading their] That's just too sick!

    Now i'm off to get something to eat.
     
  6. Dennis Nicholls

    Dennis Nicholls Lead Actor

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    I guess you really wouldn't appreciate the cricket scene near the end of Kubrick's Paths of Glory.....[​IMG]
     
  7. JohnAD

    JohnAD Cinematographer

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    So Beginning Of The End is right out?
    John.
     
  8. Chris Moe

    Chris Moe Screenwriter

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    Poor grasshopper [​IMG]
     
  9. Sean Conklin

    Sean Conklin Screenwriter

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    I believe chocolate covered Grasshoppers are a delicacy in some countries. [​IMG]
    Hi John, how's it been going? [​IMG]
     
  10. Inspector Hammer!

    Inspector Hammer! Executive Producer

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    Hey Sean, can't complain...much. [​IMG] I tried to e-mail you a couple of months back about the Real Genius dvd but I got no reply. That's cool though, you were probably busy. I guess I don't have to ask if you got the dvd. [​IMG]
    quote...
    "Poor grasshopper."
    [in best George Costanza voice] We had a deal with the grasshoppers! The deal was they stay outside! Once they come in all bets are off baby! John is gettin upset! [​IMG]
     
  11. Sean Conklin

    Sean Conklin Screenwriter

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    I'm sorry John, with school and everything I have been real busy moving and crap, I finally am settled (I hope) for a while.
    I will PM you with my new e mail. [​IMG]
     
  12. Malcolm R

    Malcolm R Executive Producer

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  13. Sean Conklin

    Sean Conklin Screenwriter

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    I updated my profile, so now everyone should be able to e mail me. (Not that everybody would want to [​IMG] )
    You betcha I got the "Real Genius" DVD, it's glorious!!
    I'm just chillin' waiting for BTTF trilogy and Convoy.
    Also I am trying to get "Duel", but am not having any luck.
     
  14. Sean Conklin

    Sean Conklin Screenwriter

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    Oh yeah, and the Titanic SE! When's that sucker comin'?
     
  15. Inspector Hammer!

    Inspector Hammer! Executive Producer

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    WARNING!: TEMPORARY THREAD DETOUR AHEAD. SEVERE TIRE DAMAGE! [​IMG]
    About the Titanic: First Class Edition DVD, I would like to tell you first quarter of 2003, but I think we would have heard about it by now if that were the case. Hopefully we'll get it in the second quarter though.
    Now, about those bloody grasshoppers...[​IMG]
     
  16. Sean Conklin

    Sean Conklin Screenwriter

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    Use a ping pong paddle and see if you can whack them in mid air. I mean if you have to deal with them, why not help your phobie and reflexes by having a little fun with them.
    Also I think they make good bait, got any good fishing nearby?
    Ever played boxing with a "Pincher Bug"? You hold them by the Pincher and flick them in the face, they will go unconscience and then regain consciensness, I use to be mean to insects when I was younger, and maybe a little bit now [​IMG]
    I have played ping pong with a few bugs lately. And actually a pincher bug not too long ago....... errrrm sorry.
    Thanks for the "Titanic" Tip John. [​IMG]
     

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