I nearly lost it at work yesterday... (1 Viewer)

[Moe Maishlish]

So I come in to work yesterday and find a note on my desk. It reads as follows:

"Mo,

I've borrowed a power supply and your earphones from your desk!

Please let me know as soonas you them back."

Signed coworkers name at the bottom of the page. Let's just refer to him as "Dickhead".

I was LIVID to say the least. A power supply I can understand... those are company property. But to "borrow" my earphones (which I had forgotten to lock up the night before), which are basically a personal piece of property that sit on ones ear (and can be very dirty if not properly cleaned/taken care of) was just too much.

Yeah, he left a note, but this guy has shown himself to be somewhat inconsiderate in the past, especially at work. For example, over the holidays we had a potluck lunch at work in which someone brought in a sushi platter. While everyone was standing in line at the food-table, this guy was just picking pieces off the plate and eating them, one by one, in line. He polished off at least half the plate (no joke) in a few minutes, without the thought that other people might want to partake of the sushi. This was observed by several of my coworkers, and comments were made between us about his behaviour.

In any event, I showed the note to several people in my office who were equally disgusted. I couldn't find The Dickhead, as he wasn't sitting at his desk.

At around noonish, The Dickhead comes by and mentions that he still has my stuff and to let him know when I want it back. I tell him rather calmly but dryly,

Me: "I'll let you know when I need the power-supply back. You can keep the Earphones."
DH: "Really? Why."
Me: "They're earphones, and kind of a private piece of personal equipment that I like to think of as sanitary. I don't want them back."
DH: "Oh, well I'll buy you another pair."
Me: "Don't worry about it."
DH: "Really, I will."
Me: "Fine. Thanks."

Several people near me heard the conversation and were pretty much speechless. As of today, I haven't received another pair of earphones, nor has The Dickhead said a word to me since.

I wanted to avoid making a massive deal out of this, especially considering it was just a pair of earphones, and not worth making a big stink about, especially at work. I can't help but wonder though, how long it's going to take until this guy steps on the wrong foot.

Moe.

 

[BrianW]

This guy reminds me of my college roommate. He was the most thoughtless, selfish person I've ever allowed to be my friend. The really goofy thing of it is that even with his "forgiveness is easier to get than permission" approach to life, he actually deluded himself into thinking that he was a nice, stand-up, Golden-Rule kind of guy.

One good thing came out of my association with him, though. He set a new standard for me to use when establishing who my former friends should be.

 

[Max Leung]

Wow I can't believe you let him get away with it Moe. People continue to act this way because others let them get away with it!

But then again I'm an old geezer who no longer takes shit from anybody anymore. And I'm Canadian!

 

[Moe Maishlish]

And I'm Canadian!

Same here Max.

I can't say that I'm letting him get away with it. I think I made myself clear on the subject by telling him that, no, I don't way my earphones back now that they've touched your ears, thank you very much.

Short of accosting him in the office and giving him hell about taking other peoples' property without first obtaining permission, I don't think there's anything else I could do.

These things have happened to me in the past with friends and/or roommates who take it upon themselves to think that what's mine is there's (DVDs!!!). In those situations, I make it a point to let them know that, if they want something (or assume to borrow it from me), that permissing must be obtained, respect must be maintained, and the integrity of the object that they're "borrowing" must be sustained. Dont return my "Little Shop of Horrors" collectors DVD to me with the box all scratched up, and act surprised when I'm upset about it (yes, this has happened).

Moe.

 

[JoshF]

All I can think about in response to this is, "Thank God I don't work in an office environment anymore."

 

[ThomasC]

"Terry Tate" his ass!

If you don't know what I'm talking about: http://www.terrytate.reebok.com

 

[Jared_B]

Permissing must be obtained, respect must be maintained, and the integrity of the object that they're "borrowing" must be sustained.

Excellent quote!

I've always lived by this when allowing others the use of my stuff, but I've never put it into such poetic words. The quote needs to be made into a sticker that you can put on any item you're loaning out.

 

[Moe Maishlish]

Jared,

Thanks. :b

Maybe I'll add it to my sig.

Moe.

 

[Joe Szott]

Unfortunately Moe, you did let him get away with it. Although any normal person would be well chastized by your comment, someone who 'skates by' and is inconsiderate to begin with, just isn't going to get it. And look, now he has a new pair of earphones for free.

I'd give this guy a private note (not a public discussion in the cube farm) that you don't like him borrowing stuff when you are not there and to please stop. It's not mean, it's the truth!

 

[DavidAM]

I'm just curious if you buy a new phone everytime someone is visiting at your house and talks on your phone? I guess you have never used a payphone either. Not that you have to these days with everyone having a cell phone, but if you have, I think that is much more disgusting than one person wearing your earphones for an hour. It seems like its not really the sanitation of the earphones, but that it was the Dickhead that actually borrowed them. Would you have been just as mad if it was the 110lb. pretty young blond in the office that borrowed them? I mean, I do see where you're coming from, but think maybe you could have told him you think its disgusting and not to do it again and just wipe them down good.....just my view.

 

[Carl Johnson]

Would you have been just as mad if it was the 110lb. pretty young blond in the office that borrowed them?

Now you must know that's an absurd comparison. I wouldn't hesitate to stick my tongue down the throat of this blonde but that doesn't give one of my coworkers just cause to borrow my toothbrush.

 

[DavidAM]

I guess it depends ono the style of earphones we are talking about. If they just sit over your ear, then that is very much like a phone, so I don't see how you can say its completely different. Even if its the little ear buds, its not like you shove them down your ear canal....they sit right on the outside your ear. Now, using someone else's toothbrush would be completely different!!! Now that's what would make me blow up! ....but earphones? Nah, just tell him not to do it again and wipe them off. But, to each his own.

 

[ThomasC]

Never mind.

 

[Jared_B]

David, Moe's biggest complaint doesn't seem to be the sanitation issue, but simply the fast that they were borrowed without permission. Suggesting the sanitation was simply Moe's attempt to get the DH to think about asking permission next time he borrows something - that maybe "borrowing" isn't so harmless after all.

I like Joe's suggestion too. Perhaps something a little more straight forward would really sink in.

 

[Moe Maishlish]

David,

I'm somewhat anal when it comes to using phones... call it a quirk of mine but if/when I use a payphone I don't hold it directly to my ear/mouth. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those guys that walks around with little white gloves all the time to avoid contact with the outside world, but when I'm aware that something like a payphone (or earphones) might come in direct contact with several people's dirty ears (and come on, lets face it... how many people make a point of keeping regular ear-hygene?!?), I try to avoid any excessive contact.

Having said that, what Jared has pointed out is exactly my point. Had someone ASKED to use the earphones, I might have consented. At least in that case I can be selective with whom I lend out my property. But in this case, something of a personal nature was taken without my consent, under the assumption that I would be "OK" with it.

Well, I wasn't. And after having discussed this issue with several of my coworkers, neither would they be.

Funny enough, I've learned a little bit more about this guy in the past 24 hours, and let's just say that I'm not the first person to feel this way about him.

Moe.

 

[Chuck C]

same thing happened to me and my roommate...used my headphones the entire year (august to may) and wanted to give them back...i insulted him when i said, hell no...those are yours now; they've been on your ears!

the noive!

 

[Jon_Are]

I work in a hospital where it is common practice for doctors and nurses to borrow the occasional stethoscope. Most of us (though not all) extend the courtesy of cleaning the earpieces with alcohol swabs before handing them back to the lender.

Jon