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Household Chores

Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by Terry Hansen, Mar 12, 2002.

  1. Terry Hansen

    Terry Hansen Stunt Coordinator

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    I do a lot of the outside stuff like shoveling snow, caring for the lawn and picking up the dog poop. Inside I do all the vacuuming, usually do the dishes everynight and some dusting. My SO does the cooking, laundry and cleans the bathrooms (except the tub/shower which bothers her back).

    While I don't enjoy the chores I like a clean house. We've had a couple of arguements about who does more, but I feel we're pretty evenly tasked. I kind of envy the guys that sit on thier butts and the wife does all the cleaning.

    Sometimes I think I'm a little too anal about who does what. How do you guys divide the chores? Is there a better way?
     
  2. Jeff_A

    Jeff_A Screenwriter

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    It sounds as if you have a very balanced arrangement. Here is ours, I do all of the following:
    Outside Activity: snow removal, lawn care, tree pruning, etc...
    Indoor Activity: vaccuming (at least twice a week), bathrooms (the same), and dusting.
    She does everything else: laundry, shopping, majority of the cooking, etc... [​IMG]
     
  3. Brian W. Ralston

    Brian W. Ralston Supporting Actor

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    Terry,
    While I obviously do not know anything about you and your SO, having talked with others who have a similar question (or who have similar "arguments") about chores..........the problem might not really be who is doing more or if the work load is "even." The problem might be either your SO (or you for that matter), not feeling appreciated by the other for the work/chores that you do accomplish around the house.
    Just a suggestion. Try praising the little details and noticing when the other person completes one of those tasks in a positive manner. Express your gratitude that they did ***insert chore*** and how they did it.
    Perhaps even take your SO out to a nice dinner saying, "I noticed all the hard work you did on *********, and I just wanted to say I appreciate it."
    Chances are......the arguments about who is doing what, and who has the longer list of chores will go away. Too bad your SO, will not be reading this as well......but, I bet if you start out making the first move on the "praising", your SO will fall in line, do more chores to ultimately get more praise, and then return the favor of praise.
    [​IMG]
     
  4. Stacie

    Stacie Stunt Coordinator

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    Terry,
    I think the important thing if you're both reasonable people is to make sure that no one feels like they're expected to do too large a share of the housework, and to be open to re-negotiating who does what when life circumstances demand it. Otherwise, it sounds like you're doing pretty well to me.
    My husband and I don't stick to a strict division of chores, but here's a rough breakdown:
    Him: Lawn mowing, dogwalking (that was the deal when I agreed that we could get a dog), taking out garbage and recycling, keeping the kitchen clean (except when he cooks), making the morning coffee.
    Me: Laundry, cat litterbox cleaning, dusting, most of the cooking, generally keeping the clutter down, and bill paying.
    Shared responsibilities: vacuuming (whoever has time does it), snow shoveling (we share it because we live in Minnesota, on a corner lot in the city with a big driveway -- it would be way too much for one person), bathroom cleaning (he does his and I do mine), other summer/spring/fall yard chores such as hedge trimming and raking.
    We both feel like this is fair. We occasionally compromise in my favor since I'm holding down a full-time job while attending grad school. Usually I "repay" him by picking up some of his chores when I have a little extra time. Seems to work out pretty well, but then, we don't have any kids yet...
    (runs away screaming)
    [​IMG]
     
  5. David Von Pein

    David Von Pein Producer

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    Stacie ...... How can you possibly find even 2 minutes per day to be on this forum??
    Folks.....I vote Stacie in as HTF's new "Wonder Woman"!! [​IMG]
     
  6. Scott Merryfield

    Scott Merryfield Executive Producer

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    Whatever arrangement that keeps both spouses happy is correct in my book. Here's how we handle the major chores:
    Laundry: We each do our own. This is the result of each of us ruining clothing that belonged to the other (I shrunk a sweater, she turned a golf sweater pink). This way, if one of us is running low on clean clothes, we have no one else to blame. [​IMG] My wife usually washes the bedding and towels, though.
    Shopping: My wife handles this. We tried grocery shopping together when we first were married, and it did not go too well. She likes to take her time, look over all the options, check her coupons, etc. It turns into a long ordeal. I want to get in and out as quickly as possible.
    Indoor cleaning: We have a service come in every other week, and she does most of the in between cleaning.
    Yard work: I handle most of this. My wife does plant the annual flowers in the spring, but I handle the tree/bush trimming, weeding, fertilizing, etc. We have a service mow the lawn.
    Snow removal: I handle this. It's not much of a chore with a snow blower, though. It's more fun than work.
    Bill paying: My chore, too. I'm more anal with record keeping for income tax purposes, and have an automated system via Quicken for keeping track of everything and paying the bills electronically.
    Other projects (painting, staining the deck, window washing, carpet cleaning, etc.): These are big enough tasks that we will handle them together.
     
  7. Dave Morton

    Dave Morton Supporting Actor

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    Stacie, wait until you have kids. Things will change!

    Since my son was born, things have changed a bit. I still do the "heavy" stuff: shovel snow, take garbage out, mow lawn, till the garden. I also clean the shower and bathroom, pick up after the dog. As far as cooking, that depends. If my wife cooks then I clean the dishes. If I cook, then she cleans the dishes.

    Now that my wife is in the 3rd trimester with our second child, I do more work because she's not physically able. But she usually sweeps the hardwood floors, vacuums, empties the dishwasher, and does all gardening/planting. Doesn't seem like much but she stays home with my 15 month old son, and that job is bigger than all mine combined.

    Sometimes we just end up with chores. Sometimes I think I do a better job at something, so I do it. Other things she thinks she does a better job, so she does that.
     
  8. Glenn Overholt

    Glenn Overholt Producer

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    Your SO should be giving you praise as well, its only fair. If you want to have a better understanding of what you are not doing then get together and switch chores next week.

    Glenn
     
  9. DonRoeber

    DonRoeber Screenwriter

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    My girlfriend and I trry to spit the chores as evenly as possible, but we're really concerned more about each others total workload. I've been doing more of the chores around the house because she's been studying for a big final exam recently. Doesn't bother me any, and it makes her life easier. I do most of the cooking though, because I enjoy it and she hates cooking. She'll often do the dishes.
    She took me out to dinner last night though. Yay! [​IMG]
     

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