dumb songs (1 Viewer)

[Micah Cohen]

So, I'm standing in The Dollar Store or someplace, and the sound system ("Dollar Store Radio!") is playing "I Wear My Sunglasses At Night." It's a song you never really, truly listen to. But when you do (and I did) you think, "What in the jumping jehoosafat is this stupid song saying?!"

"...Don't switch the blade on the guy in shades, oh no
Don't masquerade with the guy in shades, oh no..."

Huh? What kind of dumb, dumb song is this?

Then, I was someplace else where they pipe in annoying music and they were playing that Doobie Bros song, "China Grove." What in the heck is this idiotic song about?

"...They say that the father's insane
And dear Missus Perkin's a game
We're talkin' 'bout the China Grove
Oh, China Grove..."

Nothing! It's complete gobledegook! Why is this song played all the time on "classic rock" radio? Is this "classic"? What makes this song even slightly good?

Oh, god, then I was at a stop light and next to me in the left-hand turn lane was a mini-van. Pumping from the mini-van's "sound system" was that awful, completely idiotic Black Eyed Peas song, "My Humps." I want to gouge my eyes out and stick knitting needles in my ears for just knowing what this song is, the title of it. In the passenger seat of this mini-van was a plump little pre-teen WT singing along like she was on "American Idol"; her plump little pre-teen WT mother sitting in the driver's seat.

You seen the "lyrics" to this masterwork, "My Humps"?

"...I'm'a get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump..."

What kind of dumb, dumb song is this? Kids are hearing this!

How do these songwriters get away with this DRECK? Who "requests" these "songs"? Is it the power of marketing alone that forces this stuff on us? What are your nominees for most stupid song?

MAKE IT STOP!

MC

 

[MarkHastings]

I had a conversation with the female in my band. She was talking about the lyrics to a song that we do and none of us guys knew what it was about. We then talked about how guys don't listen to lyrics, only women listen (and pay attention) to lyrics...

So I can't help ya out

 

[Malcolm R]

If you really listen to the lyrics of most hit songs, they don't make much sense. Just a few rhyming words with a catchy chorus.

And it's certainly nothing new. There are a lot of hits with nonsense lyrics going back decades.

Mostly a handful of music directors at radio who play Music God and determine what gets played and what doesn't, depending on which labels provide the most payola. Thankfully, with the advent of digital downloads and internet/satellite radio, their influence is waning a bit.

 

[drobbins]

Talk about lyrics that don't make sence. Blinded By The Light was a hit with both Bruce Springsteen & Manfred Mann

 

[Luis Esp]

Dude, that's Corey Hart's "Sunglasses At Night" you're dissing.
Take a number and wait your turn

 

[Greg_S_H]

I like Sunglasses and China Grove. They are hits and are still played because they sound good. Well, I doubt if Sunglasses is played too often. I do pay attention to lyrics, by the way. It's actually been the opposite in my experience. No women I know care anything about the lyrics, but most of the guys I know do.

 

[Alex-C]

A lot of lyrics dont make much sense if taken literally, I am not sure they are all supposed to, or in other words, sometimes my expectation is they dont have to make sense.

I am not defending Corey Hart or anything like that. In fact, I cant stand 100% of the music on the radio. I never listen to FM radio. Its AM or my Dell DJ, but I can think of 1000 songs that are lame.

But since we're on this topic, allow me to give a shout out to a now defunct group that maintained a literal, urbane lyrical content with a kick ass sound: Kitchens of Distinction

Here is sample lyric about dreams:

This fluid motion
In and out of sleep
Gets the mind awondering.
Between roadsides and streets.

Between mountainsides
And boats and aeroplane rides.
Not knowing what's controlling
The scenes in front of my eyes.

Bemused bewildered a hundred times thankful
I'm in the lap of the sweetest hours.

I have slept ten thousand nights
And I'll wake from a thousand more.
Being in and out of different worlds
And hoping for millions more.

When I wake to find something's changed
I'm deceived for the world spins on the same.

I happen to think that song Hypnogogic is the best written song I have ever heard about dreams or dreaming...

 

[Micah Cohen]

Huh. You know, I give stuff like "Blinded By The Light" (Springsteen's original version) a pass. In the context of "early Springsteen" it works as an example of his sort of "street rap" (not "hip-hop," but "patter") type of jazzy poetry. Those couple of early albums are filled with this kind of stuff, and yet they mostly work because they (the words, the excellent band performances) combine to deliver an impression, a feeling, of "New York City/Jersey Shore summer days" for those of us who grew up there.

But "China Grove"? "My Humps"?

It's just bizarre.

I'm sure we could come up with more.

MC

 

[Jeff Gatie]

Read an interview with Springsteen that was written after Greeting From Asbury Park came out. At the time, his writing style was being compared to Bob Dylan, some even hyped him as "the new Bob Dylan." This was mentioned to him in the interview, specifically Blinded by the Light; the interviewer fawning over his wordsmanship and raining platitudes down on Bruce. Bruce replied deadpan, "Man, I was just trying to think of some shit that rhymed."

 

[Hugh Jackes]

My vote for the dumbest, Romeo's Tune by Steve Forbert:

Meet me in the middle of the day
Let me hear you say everything's okay
Bring me southern kisses from your room
Meet me in the middle of the night
Let me hear you say everything's alright
Let me smell the moon in your perfume

Oh, Gods and years will rise and fall
And there's always something more
It's lost in talk, I waste my time
And it's all been said before
While further down behind the masquerade the tears are there
I don't ask for all that much I just want someone to care
That's right now

Meet me in the middle of the day
Let me hear you say everything's okay
Come on out beneath the shining sun

Meet me in the middle of the night
Let me hear you say everything's alright
Sneak on out beneath the stars and run

Oh yeah, oh yeah yeah, oh yeah

It's king and queen and we must go down now beyond the chandelier
Where I won't have to speak my mind and you won't have to hear
Shreds of news and afterthoughts and complicated scenes
We'll huddle down behind the light and fade like magazines

Meet me in the middle of the day
Let me hear you say everything's okay
Bring me southern kisses from your room

Hey hey, meet me in the middle of the night
Let me hear you say everything's alright
Let me smell the moon in your perfume

Oh now, meet me in the middle of the day
Let me hear you say everything's okay
Let me see you smiling back at me

Hey, meet me in the middle of the night
Let me hear you say everything's alright
Hold me tight and love and loving's free

Woah yeah

 

[Don Giro]

I've probably heard Boston's "More Than a Feeling" at least 1,000 times over the 30 years since its release, but it was only about two years ago that I "heard" the lyrics to the song. The only words I ever really "heard" before were the repetition of the title, and the lyric snippets "I closed my eyes..." and "I begin dreaming..." I never had any idea there was a girl named Marianne in the song.

Funny thing is I usually have a good ear for lyrics. You'd think this overplayed 70s rock radio classic would have sunk in years ago.

 

[Micah Cohen]

"Meet me in the middle of the day
Let me hear you say everything's okay..."

AH! I HATE THAT SONG! Every dentist's office that ever plays that song should be burned down!

Good call on that song. Totally dumb.

FOAMY!

MC

 

[Zen Butler]

Ssss
Aaaa-
Ffff-
Eeee-
Tttt-
Yyyy
Safety-Dance!

Ah we can dance if we want to, we can leave your friends behind
Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance
Well they're are no friends of mine
I say, we can go where we want to, A place where they will never find
And we can act like we come from out of this world
Leave the real one far behind,
and we can dance

We can dance if we want to, we can leave your friends behind
Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance
Well they're are no friends of mine
I say, we can go where we want to a place where they will never find
And we can act like we come from out of this world
Leave the real one far behind
and we can dance.


WTF is a safety dance?

 

[Colton]

"Pop Goes The World" isn't much better ...


- Colton

 

[WillG]

Wait a second. In Manfred Mann's "Blinded by the Light" the lyric is not "Revved up like a Deuce" it's "Wrapped up like a douche" everybody knows that

One lyric that has always bugged the hell out of me is from Soul Asylum's "Runaway Train".... "Bought a ticket on a runaway train, like a madman laughing at the rain" What the hell does that mean!? How do those two things compare in any way (I know that they guy is not literally buying a ticket for a runaway train and that it must mean something else, but still)

Surprised there has been no mention of "I am the Walrus" yet.

 

[Ruz-El]

It was only recently that I learned that the lyrics were not in fact "Wrapped Like a douche, floatin in the night".

It made me sad.

Zen, That Safty Dance is the new fangled version with the chant at the front and the end. I don't think the original has it.

 

[Jerry Almeida]

Link

 

[Chu Gai]

I'll put in a nomination for James Blunt's 'You're Beautiful'. A song about a guy who sees a hot babe and has no idea what to do. Pathetic putz.

 

[Dave_Brown]

It's gotta be drugs, buying a lil' somethin' / somethin' and the results will have him laughing like a mad man out in the rain.

Now a truly dumb song full of lyrics that ramble all over the place has gotta be the ol' staple American Pie. I know, pissing on a classic here, but really the lyrics are nothing more than ramblings that allow a person to think they are in touch by "knowing exactly what each verse means" just because three washed up rockers died in a plane crash.

 

[Chu Gai]

Awww hell, I think Buddy Holly had a lot more left in him.