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Depressed web server. (1 Viewer)

AllanN

Supporting Actor
Joined
Mar 15, 2002
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http://www.clockbot.net/resume/viewresume.php
Although all I could think of while reading that was:
I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a...fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.
 

Bjorn Olav Nyberg

Supporting Actor
Joined
Oct 12, 1999
Messages
945
Kinda reminded me of the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy:
____________________
Modern elevators are strange and complex entities. The ancient electric winch and ''maximum-capacity-eight-persons'' jobs bear as much relation to a Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Happy Vertical People Transporter as a packet of mixed nuts does to the entire
west wing of the Sirian State Mental Hospital.


This is because they operate on the curios principle of ''defocused temporal perception''. In other words they have the capacity to see dimly into the immediate future, which enables the elevator to be on the right floor to pick you up even before you knew you wanted it, thus eliminating all the tedious chatting, relaxing, and making friends that people were previously forced to do whist waiting for elevators.



Not unnaturally, many elevators imbued with intelligence and precognition became terribly frustrated with the mindless business of going up and down, up and down, experimented briefly with the notion of going sideways, as a sort of existential protest, demanded participation in the decision-making process and finally took to squatting in basements sulking.


An impoverished hitch-hiker visiting any planets in the Sirius star system these days can pick up easy money working as a counsellor for neurotic elevators.
 

Mikael Soderholm

Screenwriter
Joined
Apr 5, 1999
Messages
1,121
Location
Stockholm, SWEDEN
Real Name
Mikael Söderholm
Don't you people recognize Marvin the paranoid android when you nmeet him 'in person' ;)?
If it wasn't him, it must at least be some relation, don't you think?
Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and you ask me: can I pick up that piece of paper?...:)
 

Bill Slack

Supporting Actor
Joined
Mar 16, 1999
Messages
837
Yes, the '... brain the size of the universe...' line is direct from the voice-box of Marvin.
 

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