"Clockwatching" - An SVS 20-39CS+ diary (LONG).

Discussion in 'Archived Threads 2001-2004' started by Jeremy Anderson, Mar 20, 2002.

  1. Jeremy Anderson

    Jeremy Anderson Screenwriter

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 1999
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    0
    Friday, February 22nd
    I have no credit card! Not that I'm overly upset by this, because frankly, credit is the devil that will send us all to hell on a flaming surfboard while Chris Farley jumps on our withered spine. But the one drawback to this is that I can't easily order stuff off of the internet. So, after clearing things with Erik at SVS, today I dropped the check in priority mail for the 20-39CS+/Samson 1000 with the understanding that nothing would ship until the check had cleared the bank. And then I prepared the funeral rites for my Polk PSW350...
    Monday, February 25th
    Got notice that the check arrived today. And now, the waiting begins for the check to clear. My foot has begun to tap uncontrollably, which bothers me a bit but is not unmanagable. The Polk sub rattled a bit today, knowing that its time will soon come to an end.
    Friday, March 1st
    The check hasn't cleared yet! Damn stupid banks and their need to make sure the funds are actually there! Don't these people know that the Polk is taunting me with its one-note boominess? Without thinking, today I pulled out a large section of hair in frustration. It didn't really hurt until the shampoo hit it. Note to self: Wear a hat to work.
    Thursday, March 7th
    Too frustrated... I haven't received word on the check. I don't want to bother the guys at SVS much, but I've decided to e-mail them again and ask if the check has cleared. How the hell can a check take two weeks to clear? I suspect the bank has somehow been bribed by my Polk sub.
    Thursday, March 7th (ADDENDUM)
    It cleared! Jim O at SVS e-mailed me today! Now, I can begin the arduous process of tacking down all the pictures and knick-knacks to avoid unnecessary rattling. It may take some late-night force recon style covert ops, but I think I can move that china cabinet to another room without anyone noticing.
    Monday, March 11th
    I asked Erik at SVS when my stuff was going to ship so I could take off work to receive it. He says they are running low on the CS+ drivers, but that they think my order will be processed and shipped before they run out. My Polk has begun making this stomping sound, as if the hounds of hell were marching through my living room (except that the hounds of hell have no appreciable bass energy below 38Hz, thanks to the Polk's dual ported enclosure). I have now pulled out all of my hair, but find that without hair, I am a damn sexy looking man. Once the scabs heal, I may keep it this way.
    Friday, March 15th
    I must heal fast, because the scabs on my head have cleared up. Without hair, I look a bit like John Candy in Stripes... so I decide to let it grow out again. There is still no word on whether my subwoofer has gone out the door. At work, I started to cry uncontrollably for no reason. One of our secretaries suggested that I e-mail SVS and ask if it has shipped yet. The Polk sub called the office this morning and left a message that it was going to kill me in my sleep. I must find someone I hate to sell it to as soon as possible.
    Friday, March 15th (ADDENDUM)
    NO! DAMN DAMN DAMN! Fate has turned on me like a Saigon whore who harvests your organs while you sleep off the hash! Erik at SVS e-mailed me back, and they ran out of CS+ drivers right before they got my order out. The next shipment of drivers won't be in for two weeks! TWO FRIKKIN' WEEKS! I can almost hear the Polk sub laughing, taunting me with its lack of subsonics. As a joke (or an act of desperation), I e-mail Erik and tell him it's okay if they send me a B-stock unit if they'll throw in a free ART-351 EQ, well aware that this is merely the rantings of a madman and will be quickly dismissed. I just can't handle this stress. While no one is looking, I'm going to sniff the rubber cement and see if it gives me a buzz.
    Fryda4e, martch 155 (asdendujm]
    Rubbbr semehnt iz maykeng me eyes see fuhnee culors. I luv yoo guys. I jusht w8ish the rabitts wuld stahp jumpeng on my desck.
    Friday, March 15th (SECOND ADDENDUM)
    Rubber cement, though a good buzz, makes it incredibly hard to type. Plus, my nostrils are now stuck together and my lips are getting chapped from breathing through my mouth. But it's okay! I got an e-mail back from Erik at SVS! He told me they couldn't just GIVE me a new ART-351, but that they had B-stocks in of the 20-39CS+, Samson 1000 and ART-351 and that they'd ship them today for the same price if I would take all B-stock gear. HELL YES I WILL! I fired off the e-mail immediately, and I pray that the B-stocks will be on their way soon. Before I left work, I called the Polk sub and told it that it was now my bitch. Note to self: If I ever have a child, at least OFFER it to the guys at SVS. Maybe they can put it next to an Ultra and see if it vomits with a 5Hz signal.
    Friday, March 15th (THIRD ADDENDUM)
    I arrived home to find a UPS tracking number for 3 packages, totalling in at a nice fat 110 pounds. YAY! I scrawled pagan symbols on the side of the Polk sub in my own blood to trap the evil bass-less demons inside until I could pass it on to some other poor soul. My hair is starting to come back, and the foot tapping has stopped. God, I feel good...
    Friday, March 15th (FOURTH ADDENDUM)
    Well dammit. The 3-meter BetterCables interconnect I ordered with my gear is out of stock. I suppose now I'll have to head to the dreaded Radio Shack to buy some banana plugs. I still have some 16-gauge Monster Cable tucked in the closet from my old system, so I suppose that will do until they get more cables in.
    Tuesday, March 19th
    9:00am
    Where in the hell are the UPS people? WHERE? The UPS site says my gear was put on a truck for delivery at 5:27am. Does it really take them 4 hours to get to my house? Damn them, and damn their slow trucks!
    10:30am
    I've had a shower, disconnected the Polk and set it aside, thrown the concrete blocks I had on top of and underneath the Polk out in the backyard... and still no UPS man. I've started pulling my hair out again. In a fit of sudden organization, I lined up all the necessary tools on the table: Avia disc, SPL meter, homemade cable, cheater plug (just in case), and the usual assortment of demo material (Saving Private Ryan DTS, The Haunting DTS, Titan A.E., Toy Story 2, Jurassic Park Trilogy DTS, Unbreakable, etc.). My mind is scanning the sound of every passing car in anticipation of the old familiar UPS truck sound... but the longer I wait, the more they all sound like UPS trucks. Damn them... and damn their brown-pelted hides.
    12:30pm
    I'm watching Xanadu. I'm not really sure of my sanity anymore, but damn that Olivia Newton John was hot back in the day. I consider sniffing more glue instead, but think better of it.
    2:30pm
    I kissed the UPS man full on the lips, and I think that scared him. But regardless, my baby is here! After scrambling about to hook everything up properly, I turned on the big switch on the front of the Samson... and proceeded to hear a nice loud hum. So I hooked up a cheater plug to it, and the hum was still just as loud. I lifted the ground on the ART-351, and still... loud hum. So I dialed down the level on the EQ to its midpoint, and the sound subsided... but didn't go away completely. For the hell of it, I lifted the EQ off of the top of the Samson amp... and suddenly, the hum was gone! After stealing the unused stick-on rubber feet that came with the Polk RT25i's I recently purchased, I isolated the EQ from the amp and all was well.
    3:30pm
    Jesus... Sweet Jesus... After calibration with Avia (speakers at 75dB, sub at 77dB uncorrected), I popped in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. OUCH! The THX intro hit me in the chest like a shotgun. It was a quality of bass that I'd never heard -- clean, mean and low. The local theater has nothing on this beast. I move on to the usual bass demos -- The Haunting DTS, Titan A.E., Toy Story 2, Jurassic Park DTS... and with each passing moment, I was more excited than Michael Jackson at a Kindercare. If I hadn't ripped out all my hair, I'm sure the air moving out of this thing would have blown it back.
    5:30pm
    My mother walks into the room and sees the beast. Surprisingly, she says "Hey, I like the way that looks. You should have gotten two, though, so both sides of the room would match." God, I love that woman. And she loves me... or at least, she did until I put on Saving Private Ryan DTS.
    7:30pm
    My guests have arrived to watch DONNIE DARKO. Some decent bass for a kinda' cheap movie, and everyone is impressed by the difference in sound. The movie was also bizarre and quite interesting, and I am happy... but I'm secretly waiting for everyone to leave so I can start going through demo discs again.
    9:30pm
    My guests decide to stick around to watch TRAINING DAY. Good lord! Nail down the furniture, because the SVS is in the house! My Polk sub is in the other room crying softly to itself, but I can't hear it over the sweet smooth bass emanating from the 20-39CS+. Someone asks if it was worth $1100... to which I reply "Yes... yes it was." A shotgun blast in the movie confirms this, and everyone stops looking at me like I'm insane. Secretly, I laugh to myself... because I -am- insane... or at least so the demon possessing my cat tells me.
    12:30pm
    Everyone is gone. I want to stay up and play with the new sub, but I have to go to work in the morning. Goal for tomorrow -- Start researching proper equalization.
    THE REVIEW:
    System: Onkyo 595, Polk RT25i mains, RT25i surrounds, CS245i center, Samson 1000, ART-351, SVS 20-39CS+ (speakers calibrated with Avia to 75dB, sub at 77dB uncorrected).
    It took me some time to get used to the absence of boominess that I was accustomed to with the Polk sub, but I could not be more pleased with this subwoofer. My usual test CD for bass is Erykah Badu's BADUIZM, which uses a lot of upright and synth bass, and the SVS handled every note smoothly. A quick run-through of The Haunting DTS, Toy Story 2, Saving Private Ryan DTS, Jurassic Park DTS and Star Wars: The Phantom Menace confirmed what everyone in this forum has been saying -- the SVS is the best thing to hit my home theater since I bought that midget slave who passes out candy and popcorn. I'm sure that I will be even more pleased with it after I tweak the EQ a bit... but for now, human decency is the only thing keeping me from dry-humping this subwoofer, because I love it! Thanks and much love to Tom, Ron, Erik K, Jim O and the members of this forum who tempted me endlessly. And you guys at SVS... I'll work on getting you that firstborn male child. [​IMG]
     
  2. JohnnyHK

    JohnnyHK Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2002
    Messages:
    105
    Likes Received:
    0
    [​IMG] Freakin' hilarious, Jeremy. Glad your tale of woe had a happy ending and thanks for starting off my day with a good laugh! [​IMG]
     
  3. Norman Short

    Norman Short Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2001
    Messages:
    61
    Likes Received:
    0
    Great stuff! I'm going through my own withdrawal symptoms waiting on my 20-39CS+ order. I already have the Sampson, and am using it to drive my mains just so I get a taste of what I've ordered. The wait is killing me! I have a stack of movies I wont watch because I know I'll just watch them again when the SVS arrives. I keep watching comedies and television without significant bass in the meantime. My pipe organ music taunts me at night, keeping me awake. My Klipsch KSW-15 is I believe in a conspiracy with your Polk to keep people away from the competition. Sad thing though is that my Klipsch will find a home with my brother or mother since she has no sub at all and he still has a Bose system.

    I wonder if I should be asking to take a B-stock instead of a new one. I actually paid less for mine than the B-stock price thanks to the group buy at Home Theater Spot. Probably be worth it to get it two weeks sooner.
     
  4. Tony Meconiates

    Tony Meconiates Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2002
    Messages:
    188
    Likes Received:
    0
    dude get a credit card! or a debit card at least!!!!!
     
  5. Loring

    Loring Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2000
    Messages:
    71
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks I needed the good laugh this morning.
    Credit Cards are of the devil but don't tell him I told you so...damn contracts. [​IMG]
    I have seen what credit cards can do, my mom went BK 10 years ago because of credit cards. And a best friend of mine is in major debt because of them also.
    I myself has learned from the past and only have a debit card that is also my atm card. And I only buy what I can afford if I used cash. I just hate carring cash.
    Well I will be ordering a 16-46CS with Samson S700 by Friday so I will also be joining the ranks of SVS junkies.
    Enjoy the bass.
     
  6. Earl J

    Earl J Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2001
    Messages:
    101
    Likes Received:
    0
    LOL!!! This was just what I needed this morning. Thanks Jeremy. Great post.
     
  7. SHAWN SZILEZY

    SHAWN SZILEZY Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 1999
    Messages:
    136
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jeremy,
    That is the greatest post I have read in a long time! The soda is still streaming from my burning nostrils and my eyes are watering uncontrollably. Awesome post! [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  8. Brian Harnish

    Brian Harnish Screenwriter

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2000
    Messages:
    1,216
    Likes Received:
    0
    ROTFLMAO!!! [​IMG]
    Great post!! Now you have me drooling over the possibility of buying an SVS. This upgradeitis is going to cost me big time! But still...I love it. [​IMG]
     
  9. Trent Tunstell

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2000
    Messages:
    38
    Likes Received:
    0
     
  10. SVS-Ron

    SVS-Ron Screenwriter

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2001
    Messages:
    1,074
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jeremy,

    Thanks for that, uh, review. I'm still searching for a superlative quote I can use for our Reviews page but I'm afraid being "SVS, so good you want to hump it" isn't gonna cut it ;^)

    Lay off the glue for a few days and maybe we can work something out ;^0

    All the best and thanks for the laugh.

    PS Be kind to your mom, she'll be the one telling your kids about you some day.

    Ron
     
  11. James Edward

    James Edward Supporting Actor

    Joined:
    May 1, 2000
    Messages:
    855
    Likes Received:
    0
    Anyone with a spouse that thinks they spend too much time obsessing on their HT should print this out and keep it around. It will come in handy. [​IMG]
     
  12. Vin

    Vin Supporting Actor

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2000
    Messages:
    546
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jeremy, you are indeed a pisser!!!!! [​IMG]
    Enjoy,
    Vin
     
  13. David_Stein

    David_Stein Second Unit

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2002
    Messages:
    422
    Likes Received:
    0
    first of all, you just made me want an SVS even more.
    second of all, why dont you get a check card? i know im scared to death of getting a credit card (i just dont trust myself [​IMG] ) but check cards are hte greatest thing since sliced bread...
     
  14. Mike Veroukis

    Mike Veroukis Second Unit

    Joined:
    May 8, 2001
    Messages:
    455
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Canada
    Real Name:
    Michael
     
  15. Earl J

    Earl J Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2001
    Messages:
    101
    Likes Received:
    0
     
  16. Steve Stogel

    Steve Stogel Supporting Actor

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2000
    Messages:
    600
    Likes Received:
    0
    That was as hilarious as it was long. I've got to agree with Mike. I think this
     
  17. Jim_C

    Jim_C Cinematographer

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2001
    Messages:
    2,058
    Likes Received:
    13
    That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. My co-workers are a bit puzzled about why I'm laughing out loud. The Polk stuff kills me [​IMG]
    This one beats the 'my svs made my cat puke' thread.
    I'm going to make my wife read this. Maybe she'll start to understand.
     
  18. Chuck C

    Chuck C Cinematographer

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2001
    Messages:
    2,224
    Likes Received:
    1
    LOL! [​IMG]
    Now I REALLY wanna blow some cash on a few SVS subs.
    Here's a great line:
    "I scrawled pagan symbols on the side of the Polk sub in my own blood to trap the evil bass-less demons inside until I could pass it on to some other poor soul"
    too funny!
     
  19. Jim Prillaman

    Jim Prillaman Stunt Coordinator

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2002
    Messages:
    102
    Likes Received:
    0
    Awesome report, Jeremy. Makes me look forward even more to the day when I can add an SVS to my setup (hoping for some time this summer). Absolutely hysterical.
     
  20. Jeremy Anderson

    Jeremy Anderson Screenwriter

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 1999
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    0
    I've had three credit cards... all three of which were maxed out by someone else, and I got stuck with the bills. I'm getting a check card next week... but that didn't solve my immediate need for an SVS quickly enough. Despite the wait for the check to clear, I was thoroughly blown away by SVS' service. All three B-stock items were in perfect condition. Also, I must say this: The pictures on the SVS website don't truly convey just how frikkin' huge these subs are. I'm not complaining, because there's nothing like having guests walk in and see this imposing beast of a subwoofer sitting in your corner... but it was definitely bigger than I'd expected it to be. Another important note: Don't try to bear-hug the SVS to pick it up! I learned quickly that the fabric covering it just slides right up like a sock! OOPS!
    And Ron, you expected a serious review from the guy who writes www.liquidmeat.com? I'm working up a more technical review for the reviews section of a friend's message board, so I'll post that here as well and maybe there will be something that you can use.
     

Share This Page