BIG problem!!!!

Cam S

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well guys/girls, not too sure how to start off, so I'll start from the beginning.

I had a female friend, we'll call her Mell. I was friends with Mell, and she had feelings for me, I however did not have those kind of feelings. We hung out a few times, and she actually thought we were seeing each other, but when I found that out I told her I couldn't do that, for various reasons. She just isn't my type.

So a few weeks later, her parents offer me a job with their company, landscaping, so I take it and all is well for the first few weeks. Then Mell starts working with me, as the foreman, and all hell breaks loose. She turns into a total hoe, bossing me around, or just not even talking to me at all. Communication in a job is important to me, so that got me a little mad. After a few weeks of her piss poor attitude and lack of communication skills, I contacted her via her cell phone and left a message saying that I was not going to work for their company anymore. It was short, but to the point and was done in a professional manner.

She absolutely freaked over this! That same night she sent me e-mails telling me NEVER to walk into a Blockbuster video again (she also manages a local blockbuster), and to find a new baseball team. She plays on the same team, but is in no way in charge of the team in any way.

I've gone into blockbuster since this, and was told by another manager that I wasn't allowed in because Mell went to the head manager and complained about me and had me banned. This lady knows me, and apologized for what Mell has done, she even knows what Mell is doing is BS. I left with no problems, and still rented a DVD. This was 2 weeks ago, and I just got back from a week and a half long business trip. Last night I had a baseball game, so I went to the game, but Mell wasn't there. The coach pulls me aside and starts to tell me that Mell has informed him that there is a restraining order against me stating I can't be within 100 yards of her, I told him that was total BS and that she just wants me off the team.

So that's the story in a nutshell. Mell seems to be VERY bitter that I wouldn't go out with her and stopped working for their company. I have been nothing but professional about the whole thing. The only time I have contacted her was to quit my job. Yet she seems to think I won't leave her alone and a restraining order of some kind is needed.

Guys, I need advice on what the hell to do here, I'm REALLY pissed off now, as I LOVE baseball and DO NOT want to get kicked off the team because of her BS. With blockbuster, is there a way I could contact head office and complain about her, as there are no grounds for her claims against me? I just don't know what to do. She's threatening to get the cops involved to, but what for? I don't talk to her, nor do I ever see her, UGHHH.

This is stressing me out to no end, help me out here!
 

MikeAlletto

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Unless she has the paper with the court order on it saying there is a restraining order (which I doubt because you probably would have gotten a copy of it), I'd say just ignore her. She's acting like a psycho. How old is she?

I wouldn't worry about it. If people approach you about it tell them the whole true story, it'll get around eventually. If you see her don't talk to her, don't have anything to do with her. If she tries to get the cops involved they'll come to talk to you about it. All you got to do is tell them the truth. They'll chalk it up as a psycho chick and let it go.
 

Richard Travale

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I would contact BB head office or maybe the regional manager. That's wacked.
Make sure you keep your rabbits locked up tight.
 

Keith Mickunas

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Can you go to the police? This is some form of harassment. Talk to her parents also since they were the ones that you worked for. It might be possible for you to get a restraining order against her and then she'd have to leave the baseball team. You need to find some people that know both sides of the story so they can vouch for you.
 

Malcolm R

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I think you're the one who needs to contact the police, or at least an attorney, to get her to stop harassing and slandering you to everyone in sight. Especially if she's spreading lies about restraining orders and such.

Stick to the truth. More than likely, she tells a different story to everyone she talks to, so if yours stays consistent people will see the light eventually.

And as far as the baseball team and Blockbuster, her opinions and statement should carry no weight. If they give you a hassle, tell them your attorney will be in touch.
 

JamesHl

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Sounds like some slandering is going on to me. I would let her know that if she doesn't stop you're going to take some kind of legal action. I wouldn't imagine that you could recoup a lot of money since it would only be over the blockbuster and your baseball team. Too bad she didn't do something untoward that led directly to your firing/quitting.
 

Cam S

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Thanks for the help so far guys.

Mell is 25, and I am 22. She has sent me a few e-mails going off at me and harassing me, and I replied to her twice, but made sure it was in a very professional business manner, as to not get myself in any trouble. Even when she was at baseball for the last few months, I never even talked to her, as I knew she was crazy, so I just kept to myself.

I had no idea I could get a restraining order on a girl, this is a very good idea. The only thing that I'm thinking about, is what would happen with the ball team. They may see that and just say screw it and kick me off the team too, and I don't want that. My parents know about everything and have read the e-mails. My dad is willing to get our attorney involved is worse comes to worse, but I would like to take action before she does. I need to stop this girl, and FAST!

Oh ya, one more thing. Her families company still owes me money from time I worked there. It's only 100 bucks, but it's still money. What could I do to get that from them if they don't pay me very soon. I should have gotten it last friday.
 

Jeff Ulmer

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You probably have good grounds for a sexual harrassment suit over the job issue, and could sue for damages for losing your job. As your supervisor, she is not allowed to harrass you because you wouldn't go out with her.

The other issues are also harrassment, and should be filed with the police.

While you may not want to go to all the trouble of actually brining a suit, it may be worthwhile to get a legal consultation, and when you know your legal footing, let her know that if she doesn't quit slandering you, she will be the one with the restraining order and a civil suit.

This chick sounds like a psycho, it's usually AFTER you've slept with them that they become freaks.
 

AllanN

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I would agree with Mike, unless this seriously starts to effect your life. Then some kind of legal action might be warranted. Epically depending on the nature of the e-mails and weather they are threating or not. Just speak the truth calm and professionally and people will see that she is at fault.

I had a similar thing happen to me, not anywhere as serious. In high school, I went to a technical school half of the day. A girl in my programming class, whom I was friends with but not interested in asked me to go to her prom. She was never the boy crazy type and I figured she wanted to go with a good friend. A few weeks later I start dating a girl from my school and took her to my prom. When the girl from my programming class found out she flipped out about how she though we where going out. She calmed down thankfully a few days later and I still went to her prom. We never did become real close friends again, probably because I hit on her fried at her graduation party and then started dating her friend. (My girlfriend and I had broken up before the party) So I hope your problem goes as smooth as mine did.

P.S.

Make sure you keep your rabbits locked up tight.
I don't get it.
 

StephenA

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It's a reference to Fatal Attraction I believe AllanN.

That girl definitely is crazy and I would talk to the police if I were you.
 

Hunter P

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It's a reference to the movie Fatal Attraction.

I feel for ya man. And I thought I had seen some crazy beyotches.


Document everything. Keep the emails. Keep any voice mails if you get them. You might want to start using a journal to document everything too. Take pictures if she starts to vandalize your stuff. Nothing helps your case more than good, thorough documentation.

I don't think you have a case for sexual harassment in the workplace since you don't work there anymore and it would be hard to prove. But you might be able to get a restraining order on her. I would definitely take the company to small claims court over the $100.
 

Moe Maishlish

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Keep the e-mails, and any other evidence you might have that proves that you've been harassed. Run, don't walk, to your attorney and get them involved NOW! The longer you wait, the more questions you'll get about why you waited... you'll also offer the opportunity for increased harassment as time goes on.

Getting a laywer involved means that you are sick the situation, and mean business. Frankly, I wouldn't worry so much about Blockbuster or Baseball... those are two issues that are relatively minor and shouldn't affect your life as much. A stalker with an agenda is a little bit more of concern than your batting average.

I don't get it.
 

Cam S

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You probably have good grounds for a sexual harrassment suit over the job issue, and could sue for damages for losing your job.
I quit the job willingly, and contacted her to tell her so. this is how it all started.

Here is the first e-mail that she sent me. it was the night I left the message on her phone. and a few hours after I did so, I went to blockbuster with my friend to rent a movie and she happened to be working.

if thats all you did was call my cell and leave a message to tell my parents that you quit, you need to grow up a little.

Why do you insist on phoning me aways?? , And come into my work when i'm there, why?? DON"T PLEASE. It bugs me why you do that. Are you going to quit my ball team too??? i can't wait until the ball season is over then i don't have to see you.
You are not my friend, i don't want to be around you.

YOU NEED TO STAY AWAY FROM ME. You saw my car there, don't come in. YOu knew i was there you asshole. About ball, find your own fucken team to play on. I'm sure you can do that.

thanks
mell


As you can she, she figured I went to blockbuster to harass her, but that wasn't the case of course.

I just got off the phone with an RCMP and he suggested to come down and check the computers for a restraining order against me, and if I want, I can get a restraining order against her, but it will cost some money, but only like 60 bucks or less.
 

Cam S

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Frankly, I woulnd't worry so much about Blockbuster or Baseball...
I LOVE both baseball and movies, so why should I let her win? I can go to another movie store, not a problem, but I don't want her to feel that she has won. With baseball, I've grown with this team and love the team. I WILL NOT let this get in the way of baseball, I love it to much.

I will be contacting the owners of the company (her parents) today to ask about my money, and if they don't give it to me, I'll be filing it with small claims today.
 

AllanN

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Thanks you guys. I have never seen it.

I would think of going to the cops and getting the restraining order first. Allot of times the person reporting the incident first is given the benefit of the doubt. I believe you are in the right but courts can be finicky.
 

Moe Maishlish

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I will be contacting the owners of the company (her parents) today to ask about my money, and if they don't give it to me, I'll be filing it with small claims today.
She may not have explained the entire situation to her parents, so they may be in the dark about the whole thing... or maybe not. Either way, they owe you money, but you've also got to ask yourself how much of your own time you're willing to invest to collect $100.

Moe.
 

Patrick_S

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One quick question, which one of you was on the team first? If she was move on, if you were then explain it to the ones who run the team and ask them to remove her from the team.

Of course if I was running the team I would selfishly keep the better player, but that's just me.
 

Cam S

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Patrick. She was on the team first. I am one of the best players on the team, if not the best. I'm also the youngest too. I guess I could find another team in the league to play on which shouldn't be hard, but it's a hassle, just like this whole situation is!
 

MikeAlletto

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I still say just ignore her. Go about your daily life. Don't reply to any of her emails, but do save them. Have ZERO contact with her. The more you ignore her the calmer she will get. As far as the money owed you, send a certified letter to her parents (owners of the company?) stating how much they owe you for work and put a time limit on it. After the time limit has passed then take whatever next step you feel like taking, EXCEPT going to see them personally.

By zero contact that means no contact at all. No matter what happens or what is said do not under any circumstances talk to or acknowledge her in anyway.

Don't waste money on a restraining order. She isn't coming to your home or stalking you. This is just some bitter pissed off psycho woman. Talk to your dad's lawyer if you want but I don't think its that bad yet.
 

Christ Reynolds

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i'd say get the restraining order, its only $60, and you dont ever HAVE to use it, but its better to actually have it than not. plus, it sounds like she is nuts. you never know when she could turn around and say "forget what i said, you are my friend, i want to be around you. always." or something like that.

CJ
 

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