Any profound regrets? (1 Viewer)

[Bill Cowmeadow]

quote:
I wonder how many plumbers and auto mechanics out there regret ....
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Grandaddy of all plumber fuck-ups

I know the guy who started a busness called 'Roto Rooter', he sold it to another local plumber who took it national less than six months later. The original guy made enough money to buy a car and pay off a couple of bills.

Yep, he was pretty regretful of that decision...
true story.

 

[Buzz Foster]

I regret not coming out at a younger age.

My contemporaries were having their first relationships at 16. Mine wasn't until 28. When it ended at 35, I was severely messed up, and it took a very long time to recover.

It is still hard for me to have reasonable expectations of relationships. I have had a tendancy to allow myself to be tread on for fear of the pain I experienced before.

I stayed closeted for far too long to keep others from being uncomfortable. In retrospect, it seems a stupid reason.

 

[JohnRice]

Steve, that seems to be such a common situation. What's interesting to me is I don't think it even has to do with orientation. So many of us start off, and often go on for years, in a sense forcing ourselves to be attracted to the people we think we are "supposed" to be attracted to, whatever that may be.

 

[Joel...Lane]

Misery does love company doesn't it?!

If I had a nickel for all of my past regrets I could probably build a very nice home theater with them, or at least buy a top of the line BluRay player!

Lost or never realized relationships seem to be the "most popular" regret, though I'm not keeping count. You can add me to that list as well. It really does no good to dwell on them either, although I do from time to time. I had the "what if" or "if only" conversation recently with someone and it'll drive you mad thinking about things that cannot be changed, ever.

As for profound regrets? I definitely have a top 5, or is it top 10? Haven't counted them recently. I also think seemingly minor decisions we make can have HUGE consequences. I'm a news photographer and some of the stuff I see on a daily basis just makes me think sometimes how random life is, especially things like car wrecks and shootings. If these people had driven down a different road or been driving at a different speed or had walked into their bedroom instead of sitting in the living room when a bullet came through the wall from a drive by and killed them they'd still be alive.

When I leave work there are numerous ways I can get home. But what if the road I pick has a drunk driver barreling towards me? Not that I obsess over every decision I make. I'm not straying too far off topic am I!?

 

[Cees Alons]

No, I believe you're not straying too far off, because your remarks touch on the very reasons to regret one's decisions.

If there's anything you could have done differently by weighing in other factors, or weighing them differently, you might regret the way you made your decision when it led to some kind of disaster.

But if you simply could never have foreseen what happened, what good is regret?

If my brains happen to be at the same spot, at a specific point in the space-time continuum, as a bullet from a gun or a concrete wall, then after that moment I wiil be either be severely damaged or dead.

But when I'm faced with a decision to go one way or another, what does it help me if that chance is equally present in all my options (as far as I can possibly know)?

And although in practice there won't be any "regret" about the own decisions when the result has been one's own death, others may indeed learn from it - if it could reasonably have been foreseen. But even doing nothing at all (e.g. lying on the floor wrapped in a blanket your whole life long) could bring problems, like a meteorite passing through your brain. Or part of the roof. Or starvation.

Also, you as a news photographer won't be called in, all those many instances when nothing bad happened at all after a decision someone had to take, so your perception of the chance of incidents (any kind of incident) to happen is possibly biased.

Cees

 

[Radioman970]

My regrets are pretty weak.

 

[Jason_V]

Dude, we could be best friends. It's really really hard to understand and accept Prince Charming isn't real and the grass isn't always greener on the other side. It's something I struggle with even now in regards to a lot of different people.

 

[Andrew 'Ange Hamm' Hamm]

Tons. One big one, which I'm dealing with now.

I'm working pretty hard now to lead a life where I'll regret as little as possible.

 

[Holadem]

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H

 

[Cees Alons]

Great, Holadem. Perfect fit here.


Cees

 

[andrew markworthy]

Cees - with the greatest of respect, if it's interesting, then there isn't the remotest chance that we psychologists would study it. Honestly, next you'll be wanting us to do something useful.

 

[Cees Alons]

Cees

 

[Holadem]

Um... Whatever happened to the OP? TMI?

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H

 

[Michael Reuben]

The OP backed out on the previous page. I'm sure I wasn't the only one who wasn't surprised.

M.

 

[JohnRice]

I'm here. Just hesitating to tell the full story.

There's been some great feedback.

BTW Holadem, what is TMI?

 

[mylan]

Too Much Information

 

[Holadem]

Oh I must've missed the "back off" post.

TMI = Too Much Information.

In any case, as long as you use the 3rd person, change the names and don't allude to the location of the body, you should be fine.

--
H

 

[JohnRice]

Unfortunately, in the context of the story, that's not exactly amusing.

 

[Michael Reuben]

You can't expect people to tiptoe lightly around a story you won't tell. If it's that sensitive, maybe starting the thread was a bad idea. Do you want it closed?

M.

 

[JohnRice]

Not at all. Just disregard the comment. I think there has been a lot of great discussion and see no reason for the thread to be closed.

My skin isn't that thin.

I hope people will continue to comment. It seems to me the basic concept is valid for discussion, regardless of how much or little is provided in specifics.