A little ditty.... :)

Joseph Howard

Stunt Coordinator
Joined
Sep 10, 1997
Messages
227
Willie found some dynamite,
Didn't understand it quite.
Curiosity seldom pays,
It rained Willie seven days.
Dr. Joe
 

Kenneth

Supporting Actor
Joined
Jul 31, 1997
Messages
757
How about this oldie:
Little Willie with a taste for gore;
Nailed his brother to the door;
Said his Mother, with a humorous taint;
Be Careful Dear, don't scratch the paint.
Or in a less bloodthirsty mode:
There once was a lady from Niger,
who smiled as she rode on a Tiger.
They returned from the ride,
with the lady inside,
and the smile on the face of the Tiger.
The other day on my back stair,
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today,
I wish, I wish, he'd go away.

Kenneth
[Edited last by Kenneth on November 15, 2001 at 01:21 PM]
 

Joel Mack

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Jun 29, 1999
Messages
2,317
There once was a man from Nantucket...
..oh wait... nevermind.

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"The internet is a place where people from all over come together to
bitch about movies and share pornography."
 

Joseph Howard

Stunt Coordinator
Joined
Sep 10, 1997
Messages
227
I'll finish that one....
There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept his cash in a bucket.
His daughter named, "Nan,"
Ran off with a man.
And as for the bucket?
"Nan-tucket!!"
Dr. Joe
 

Mike Broadman

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Aug 24, 2001
Messages
4,951
This may seem stupid, but is there actually a limerick that starts off with "There once was a man from Nantucket," is there no such limerick and it's just a running joke?
 

Joel Mack

Senior HTF Member
Joined
Jun 29, 1999
Messages
2,317
Mike,
Oh yeah...
Spoiler space for the easily offended!
Spoiler:There once was a man from Nantucket
who had a dick so long he could suck it
he said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin
"If my nose were a cunt, I would fuck it!"

Don't say you weren't warned....
------------------
"The internet is a place where people from all over come together to
bitch about movies and share pornography."
 

John Spencer

Supporting Actor
Joined
Mar 2, 2000
Messages
857
Actually, Joseph's version has been around for at least 100 years or more by published records. It's actually the first stanza of a limerick quatrain published, I believe, in one of the New England states.
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...I could go on, but I need to take a shit.
-Jason Whyte on "Corky Romano"
 

Joseph Howard

Stunt Coordinator
Joined
Sep 10, 1997
Messages
227
Complete the following....
"Starkle starkle little pink...
Who the Hell are you do I think..."
--Dr. Joe
 

Dan Hine

Screenwriter
Joined
Oct 3, 2000
Messages
1,312
Here's one:
There once was a very fine lass
who had such a very nice ass.
But it was not round and pink
as you'd probably think,
But had big floppy ears and ate grass.
Dan Hine
 

Steven K

Supporting Actor
Joined
Jan 10, 2000
Messages
830
Little Timmy took a drink
But he'll drink no more
Cause what he thought was H-2-0
Was H-2-S-O-4
or, this one that one of my friends wrote for a death-metal head co-worker of mine named John Duffy:
There once was a dude named Duff
Who listened to music so tough
He'd get his chick high
For he was quite sly
And spend all night pounding her muff
or the ever popular bathroom limericks:
Here I sit
Broken-hearted
Tried to shit
But only farted
Here I sit
Buns 'a Flexin
About to give birth
To a mighty Texan
Here I sit
No bones about it
I grunt, I sqeal
And then I sprout it
[Edited last by Steven K on November 15, 2001 at 09:09 PM]
 

Kevin T

Screenwriter
Joined
Jul 12, 2001
Messages
1,402
there once was a man named dave
who found a dead whore in a cave
she was missing a tit
and smelled like shit
but think of the money he'd save!
kevin t
 

RogerB

Second Unit
Joined
Oct 8, 2001
Messages
401
How's this, Dr. Joe:
Starkle starkle little Pink
Who the hell are you do I think
Up on stage, eyebrow shy
Like a Nazi kicking high
Starkle starkle little Pink
Who the hell are you do I think
------------------
Visit The NeoBijou
 

KyleK

Second Unit
Joined
Jan 11, 2001
Messages
438
Here's another from the scrawled-on-bathroom-stall variety:
Here I sit in deadly vapor
'cause I'm all out of toilet paper
How much longer will I linger
Before I have to use my finger
 

GARY C

Second Unit
Joined
Jul 27, 1999
Messages
251
Here's one
Shot an arrow in the air
Where it lands I do not care
Hark I hear a lady grunt
I think I hit her in the... elbow
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If you can't learn to do something right, learn to enjoy doing it poorly!
 

Jeffrey Noel

Screenwriter
Joined
Sep 11, 2001
Messages
1,533
This has got to be my favorite!!
Enjoy!

SOTALLY TOBER
Starkle starkle little twink
who the hell you are I think
I'm not under what you call
the alcofluence of incohol
I'm just a little slort of sheep
I'm not drunk like tinkle peep
I don't know who is me yet
but the drunker I stand here
the longer I get
Just give me one more drink
to fill me cup
'cuz I got all day sober
to Sunday up.
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God bless!
jeffrey noel
My DVD Collection
 

John Kilduff

Screenwriter
Joined
Oct 27, 2001
Messages
1,680
Here's one:
There's a flatulent actor named Barton
With a lifestyle dramatically spartan
But then one day
Someone wrote a play
With a role in which Barton could fart in
(Thank you, George Carlin)
Sincerely,
John "Seven words" Kilduff
------------------
"Who makes it happen?"
"I make it happen"-
Sigourney Weaver and Melanie Griffith in "Working Girl"
 

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