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The Steve Guttenberg Appreciation Thread


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#1 of 44 OFFLINE   Brian Kissinger

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Posted April 03 2002 - 06:28 PM

This will be a multi-purpose thread. In this thread we will:



Firstly First and foremost, this thread will be the place to discuss all things Steve. Current blockbusters, oscar nominations, pending roles, rumored projects, which hotty he's dating this week, nostalgic reflections, whose ass he could kick, etc..



Secondly I will run a Best Steve Guttenberg Movie Tournament. Here we, collectively, will determine the HTF's favorite Gutty movie. Great fun and serious thought and challenge lies within.



Thirdly I will run a poll discussing which roles you'd like to see Steve tackle, and which roles would be much better had Steve played them. I know pretty much all roles could be improved if Steve played them, but let's limit this to just 2 or 3 per person.



This just may go down as the HTF's greatest all time thread, so let's remember to be friendly.



OK, I will start things off.



1. I heard a rumor that George Lucas is in negotiations with Mr. Guttenberg to play Yoda in the third prequel. I think this would be an awesome way to wrap up the prequels. Let's hope George comes up with the dough to sign Steve.



Also, a buddy of mine from California called me tonight, and he says the buzz out there is that Steve has signed on to play Hal the computer in Michael Bay's remake of 2001. Let's pray together.



And my final input is that the tabloids have linked Steve with both Cindy Williams, and Penny Marshal. Way to go Steve!





2. The movies in the tourney already are as follows:



Three Men and a Baby

Diner

Rollercoaster

Short Circuit

Police Acedemy

The Bedroom Window

High Spirits

Cocoon

3 Men and a Little Lady

Cocoon: The Return

Bad Medicine

The Man Who Wasn't There

The Big Green

Police Acedemy 4: Citizens on Patrol

Police Acedemy 2: Their First Assignment

Police Acedemy 3: Back in Training

Can't Stop the Music

The Boys from Brazil



Feel free to throw out nominations for more, if you like.



We'll start off with:

Three Men and a Baby

vs

Diner





3. I think Steve should have played Marlon Brando's character in The Godfather. Granted, he was a little young then, but maybe he could just act out the scenes, and they could put him over Marlon in the film. That would be great.



As far as upcoming projects, I'd like to see Steve get the lead Terminator role in the forthcoming Terminator movie. Who else could you see being the ultimate ass-kicking robot bastard? No one, that's who.



Oh well, enough from me. Let's hear what you have to say.
"DO NOT float above me while I'm dying in the abyss!"

#2 of 44 OFFLINE   Ryan L B

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Posted April 03 2002 - 06:31 PM

how about Police Acedemy 2 through 4 and the big green as more guttenberg flicks

#3 of 44 OFFLINE   Mike Hutman

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Posted April 03 2002 - 08:11 PM

Here are some movies that Steve Guttenberg would have made much better. First he should have played Benjamin Martin in The Patriot. I mean what is more american than Steve Guttenberg. Second he should have played Dominic Toretto in The fast and the furios.When i think action. I think of one person, Steve Guttenberg. Today i just got my hands on the SUPER special edition, thats right i said super, of The usual suspects.And in the very, very deleted scenes They finaly told you what we all been trying to figer out, that Steve Guttenberg is Keyser Soze.

#4 of 44 OFFLINE   SteveGon

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Posted April 03 2002 - 08:30 PM

Hey, Mikey! Welcome to the forum!



My vote goes to Diner.



I'll nominate Cocoon: The Return.



I've heard that the Stevester is in negotiations to play the lead in Saving Private Ryan Again. In this sequel, Private Ryan gets trapped behind enemy lines during the Korean War. Steve plays Jack Miller, brother of the Tom Hanks character from the first movie. I've seen part of the screenplay and here's a bit: "My brother died saving you and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you stay behind!". Sounds like a surefire Oscar win for ol' Gutty!



I also think it'd be kinda cool to see Steve play Bruce Banner in the upcoming Hulk movie. Joe Piscopo could play the mighty green one. What more could ya ask for? Posted Image

#5 of 44 OFFLINE   Brian Kissinger

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Posted April 03 2002 - 08:50 PM


Quote:






Today i just got my hands on the SUPER special edition, thats right i said super, of The usual suspects.And in the very, very deleted scenes They finaly told you what we all been trying to figer out, that Steve Guttenberg is Keyser Soze.








I knew it all along.Posted Image Posted Image
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#6 of 44 OFFLINE   SteveGon

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Posted April 03 2002 - 09:26 PM

In case you guys are wondering, yes, we have very good weed here in Troy. Posted Image

#7 of 44 OFFLINE   Matthew Chmiel

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Posted April 03 2002 - 09:44 PM

I'll nominate Three Men and a Little Lady and I'll vote for Three Men and a Baby. Posted Image



I'm still waiting for an episode of Inside The Actors Studio with Steve Guttenberg. Who cares about Tom Hanks or Kevin Spacey... I want Guttenberg.



I'm also mad that Bruce Willis won the part of Bruce McClane in Die Hard when Guttenberg should've gotten the part. Guttenburg kicking ass, taking names, and shouting out one liners is my kind of action movie. Posted Image


#8 of 44 OFFLINE   Scott Weinberg

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Posted April 03 2002 - 09:47 PM

I'll vote Diner.



Ahh, Steve Guttenberg. The legend.



I think it's a crying shame that Arnold Schwarzenegger beat him out for the title role in Commando, but Steve got his revenge when he bowed out of Junior.



I'd like to nominate two of Steve's lead performances, both of which were criminally overlooked by the Academy:



Bad Medicine and The Man who Wasn't There.



(Again, Steve would exact his revenge by winning an Oscar for his performance in Don't Tell Her It's Me.)



--All kidding aside, I know Guttenberg's generally seen as an innocuous and shallow relic of the 1980's, but I for one would love to see some kind of wacky comeback. Maybe Quentin could cast him as an Eskimo hit-man ninja in Kill Bill! Posted Image --

#9 of 44 OFFLINE   SteveGon

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Posted April 03 2002 - 09:52 PM

I think the Stevemeister should play Robocop if Verhoeven ever does his sequel. Robo-Steve! Also, does anyone else like the sound of Darth Guttenberg? Posted Image Screw Darth Maul, The Gut-man would make a great evil Jedi!

#10 of 44 OFFLINE   Nicholas L

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Posted April 03 2002 - 10:02 PM

How about as a brutal Nazi prison commander, who has a change of heart after falling in love with a young Jewish maid in the upcomming classic Schindler's List Redux: the Musical
"Maybe I'm spending too much of my time starting up clubs and putting on plays. I should probably be trying harder to score with chicks." ---Rushmore

#11 of 44 OFFLINE   Ike

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Posted April 03 2002 - 10:10 PM

Posted Image

#12 of 44 OFFLINE   SteveGon

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Posted April 04 2002 - 03:49 AM

Sexy!

#13 of 44 OFFLINE   Brian Kissinger

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Posted April 04 2002 - 08:03 AM

We now have an even 16 "classics" in the tourney. I say we leave her there. It's going to be hard enough to decide among these masterpieces, let alone add more. As we stand right now, Diner is leading 2-1 over 3 Men and a Baby.



Just want to address the little "situation" that happened last night. Apparently, Steve was out at a restaurant getting some food, (reports were that he was with Rue McClanahan, but that hasn't been confirmed) and some crazed, jealous fan of Scott Baio's tried to attack Steve. Well, Steve did what any of us would do. He defended himself. I hear, Steve quickly dodged the butterknife thrust of this pyscho, and turned and kicked his head clean off. There was a big to do about it. The police say he used excessive force, but I say "hey, it's Steve Guttenberg. He can't control that power. He was just defending himself." Well, they let Steve go, and asked him kindly to refrain from kicking other people's heads off.



P.S. Has anyone checked out the video making the rounds on the net of Steve and Pamela Anderson? I would post some pics, but I think the Administrators would frown upon it. Let's just say that Steve IS THE MAN!
"DO NOT float above me while I'm dying in the abyss!"

#14 of 44 OFFLINE   Bill McA

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Posted April 04 2002 - 08:04 AM

How could you possibly omit 2 of Steve's greatest films (and performances)...



The Boys From Brazil in which Steve single-handedly prevents the return of Adolph Hitler!!!!



and



Can't Stop The Music in which Steve roller-skates in downtown New York while wearing his short-shorts and with a look of utter bliss on his face!!!!
       

#15 of 44 OFFLINE   Brian Kissinger

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Posted April 04 2002 - 08:13 AM

OK Bill, you talked me into it. (it was the short-shorts) We'll just have a couple triple headers.
"DO NOT float above me while I'm dying in the abyss!"

#16 of 44 OFFLINE   Brian Kissinger

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Posted April 05 2002 - 11:46 AM

I can clearly see by your lack of interest, that no one here appreciates Mr. Guttenberg. I can't for the life of me understand it, but I can accept it. I vowed to my pal that I would not let this thread die, but that would just be selfish now wouldn't it. No, I'll do the noble thing, and let this thread sink into oblivion.Posted Image



Just you remember that when Steve's time comes, I'll be forced to let him know about your lack of support.





This shall be my last Steve Guttenberg rant.
"DO NOT float above me while I'm dying in the abyss!"

#17 of 44 OFFLINE   Mike Hutman

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Posted April 05 2002 - 06:27 PM

What a sad day for allPosted Image

#18 of 44 OFFLINE   Rain

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Posted April 05 2002 - 06:45 PM

I doubt I'll be able to vote in the "tourney" part, but I just had to pop in.



Brian, you are a riot, man! Posted Image



I think Steve should play both Batman AND Robin in the same movie. How cool would that be? Posted Image

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#19 of 44 OFFLINE   Evan Case

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Posted April 05 2002 - 07:04 PM

1. Steve Guttenberg is the Ernest P. Worrell of dramatic actors.



I'm not sure what that means, though.



2. Unless the matchup is Three Men & a Baby vs. The Big Green, I'll have to abstain for each round. Of those two, Three Men & a Baby takes the "crown" as my favorite Guttenberg film.



3. He should star as the dad in Beethoven's 5th. Judge Reinhold has bastardized the Charles Grodin role long enough! Posted Image



Evan Posted Image
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#20 of 44 OFFLINE   SteveGon

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Posted April 05 2002 - 07:11 PM

Man, you guys are gonna be sorry for your lack of support when ol' Gutty wins the Nobel Prize in physics. What, you didn't know he was a particle physicist? Shame on you! Steve defines the term "renaissance man" - he can do it all! Great actor! Great scientist! Great athlete! Great lover! What a guy!!! I can't wait to read his upcoming autobiography!




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