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Conan -quick review

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#1 of 7 OFFLINE   Patrick Sun

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Posted August 23 2011 - 01:33 PM

This film started up quite promising with scenes of Conan as a boy showing his future prowess with being at home with barbarian violence, but the main storyline lumbers heavily and without much verve or attitude, and the final act just doesn't cut it for a Conan movie. I give it 2 stars, or a grade of C.
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#2 of 7 OFFLINE   Sam Favate

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Posted August 24 2011 - 12:36 AM

This was one of those movies where I figured that waiting for reviews was key. Glad I did. I will be waiting to see this on DVD or pay cable, if at all.

#3 of 7 OFFLINE   joshEH



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Posted August 24 2011 - 06:01 AM

Does it belong on the shelf beside the Arnold classic? Hell no. Does it belong on the shelf next to the Albert Pyun classic The Sword and the Sorceror? Hell yes. Two biggies: The only thing worse than Rachel's nude body-double, was Rachel's stunt-double during the carriage scene. Also, how does a boat sneak up behind another in open water? In the daytime? I think being a "Conan" movie really brought a lot of expectations it didn't deliver on. If it was just a generic S&S flick starring Momoa, people would have been more forgiving. I will say, though, that Momoa, like Routh in Superman Returns, deserves another shot at a better-written, better-directed Conan movie. I'm not damning with faint praise when I say Momoa is the best thing in the film, followed by Ron Perlman and the young Conan. The opening narration (Morgan Freeman? Seriously, Morgan? Why?) does everything in its power to bore you right out of your seat. Such a front-loading of who-gives-a-shit that seems to go on forever. I did perk up, however, when the fall of whatever ancient empire was signified by a dimly-lit model being chroma-keyed over a Bic lighter on high, or at least that's what it looked like. "Oh ho," I thought, "so that's what we're dealing with, here." Again...Momoa, he deserved better than this, and I hope he gets another crack at the character, though given the weekend box-office and that lawsuit, I doubt he'll get it. Lang's a trouper; Nichols looked incredibly bored; and McGowan looked like she was LARPing on 'shrooms. After seeing the movie, I'm just going to go and watch Centurion again, and pretend that's the Conan movie we got last week.

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#4 of 7 OFFLINE   Patrick Sun

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Posted August 24 2011 - 06:58 AM

Don't get me wrong, there is some hilarious violence in this movie, Bob Sapp was bringing some fun back in the game. But the script is just poor.
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#5 of 7 OFFLINE   Brett_M



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Posted August 26 2011 - 12:37 PM

I saw this today and while I had some serious issues with the film (especially its non-existent spacial awareness and lack of scope), I found it to be a nice movie version of a Savage Sword of Conan comic book. It is not a good origin movie to be sure and the script is ametuerish at best. Momoa is impressive as a younger Conan and his fighting skill is fun to watch but he lacks the physical presence as the huge barbarian of the pulp novels and comics. I place the blame for this firmly in the director and cinematographer' s hands. Most of the action in the finale was poorly filmed. The overhead shot shows a vast cavern with a river of lava below it and every time they fall, they land on a ledge. My other gripe is adding characters to the film that don't need to be there: Conan's friend and the theif. Conan was a thief -- he does not need help getting into a fortress. Lame. The filmmakers also aped LOTR and Pirates of the Caribbean. The opening scenes were good. The rest was a shame and a missed opportunity. It will need another reboot. Freeman's narration reminded me of James Earl Jones STUNT NARRATION in Judge Dredd and Charleton Heston's in Armageddon. **.5/*****
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#6 of 7 OFFLINE   Rhett_Y



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Posted August 26 2011 - 01:05 PM

I worried about this when I saw the trailers. I will wait for rental. Thank you for the reviews.
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#7 of 7 OFFLINE   RobertR


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Posted August 29 2011 - 11:20 AM

What a waste. I've been reading the original Robert E. Howard stories, and I think there's a lot of good material there for movies. As is always the case, you have to have a good script though, and you have to accurately capture both the barbaric action feel and the fantasy feel to get it right. The trailer didn't seem to get the fantasy feel right. Also, Conan is difficult to cast. He's very big and VERY muscular, but also lightning quick and light on his feet. He's intelligent and charismatic. Mamoa doesn't really fill the bill.