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What movie do you most detest?


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#21 of 271 OFFLINE   MatthewA

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Posted December 01 2010 - 04:46 PM

I'm leaving out films many people love that I don't and sticking to films that were poorly regarded for good reason.


I'm no purist, but if 2003's alleged movie version of The Cat in the Hat were a person, I'd gladly go to jail for killing it. I knew it was probably going to be bad going in, but I wanted to see just how bad. I had no idea how bad bad movies could be until I saw them drag Dr. Seuss out of his grave, purée his bones, and flush the purée down a toilet into a sewer that ran through the Ninth Circle of Hell and call it an adaptation of his books. Since The Grinch made so much money (I didn't like that either), Universal decided to pull out all the stops and really eviscerate one of the doctor's masterpieces. The book takes 5 minutes for an 8-year-old child of normal intelligence to read. Even the charming 1971 animated TV version had to pad it out a bit. This 80-minute battering ram to the brain wasn't a movie. It was a hate crime against cinema, literature, childhood, and color theory (I can't tell you how relieved I was to see a primary color when it was all over).


Enough is enough, Disney. No more evasions or excuses. We DEMAND the release Song of the South on Blu-ray along with the uncut version of Bedknobs and Broomsticks on Blu-ray. I am going to boycott The Walt Disney Company until then.


#22 of 271 OFFLINE   Peter K

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Posted December 01 2010 - 04:55 PM

Be Cool


The only movie I've ever walked out of at the theatre if I recall.



#23 of 271 OFFLINE   Richard--W

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Posted December 01 2010 - 07:18 PM



Originally Posted by Elizabeth S 

The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover


Granted, I have never seen the last 20 minutes of this film.  It is just one of the most unpleasant films I've seen and I finally walked out and let my date finish watching the film.  Spent the time in the lobby talking with the theater worker about having to clean up vomit after the film.  I've seen about 3 Greenaway films now and concluded they are just not for me.  I like dark and to some depressing films (love the aforementioned "Happiness"), but I don't need to see dog shit, maggots and a fork in the cheek in the guise of an arthouse film.  I could never understand Roger Ebert's love of this film, but came to realize I leaned more toward Siskel's tastes.


I second the motion.  Greenaway has made other detestable films, but The Cook, The Thief, his Wife and Her Lover is the most detestable of those I've seen. My opinion of Helen Mirren and the other distinguished Brits in the cast sunk to a new low when I saw this.


Even more detestable is Pasolini's Salo. I don't believe in censorship, but some people are just sick, and it would be better for humanity if Salo had never been made. After the first act I saw it in bits and pieces waiting for the others in my party to get as disgusted as I did. My wife stuck with it a little longer, but she was the only one to come out. You could hear the audience cringing in unison from the lobby. Pasolini was murdered by one of his kinky friends after he made this film, which doesn't surprise me.



MattCR:

I have several films I'd put as "MOST" because they are so detested that I will never try to watch any of them again.  But I really want to say I detest most:  GORE PORN.   See films like Saw




I couldn't agree more. It makes no sense that torture porn like Saw, its sequels, and the inept Rod Zombie horror/ torture porns get an R while adult character studies like Last Tango In Paris and Henry and June get an X. The reasoning defies logic and common sense.


I detest masculine deconstructions for political and sexual agendas. These films are essentially exercises in reverse discrimination to please the studio boss:


The Missing

The Legend of Zorro

D'Lovely

Superman Returns

Iron Man 2


and numerous others, but the single worst offender is of course Casino Royale.



#24 of 271 OFFLINE   Paul D G

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Posted December 01 2010 - 08:03 PM

Interesting thread, and interesting comments.  There are plenty of movies I simply didn't like (Avatar, to join the chorus) but in the end it was just a movie and I never have to watch whatever it was again.


But.


There was one movie that I hated... HATED sitting through so much I was actually getting angry.  Volcano (1997).


I gave up trying to find any sort of enjoyment out of this film when Tommy Lee Jones loses his cell phone, finds one in a car, and immediately starts getting calls on it.


But it was at the end of the film, when everyone was covered with ash, and the little girl said "Look, Mommy.  Everyone's the same!" to bring to a close the racial tensions of the film that I turned to my (future) wife and said "If this wasn't over, we'd be walking out right now."


And I am thankful that this movie was so bad that it never ever shows up on TV.  You all's going to be haunted by Avatar, Casino Royale, Transformers, etc forever.  Volcano has been completely forgotten about (except in my nightmares).  :)



#25 of 271 OFFLINE   Sam Favate

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Posted December 02 2010 - 12:12 AM

I go back and forth between naming City of Angels and Mission Impossible 2 the "worst movie ever made." Both are so full of cliches that the films don't have any substance, and just use tired formulas that are supposed to elicit emotional responses from the audience. The only responses they succeeded in eliciting from me were revolt and contempt.


#26 of 271 OFFLINE   Al.Anderson

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Posted December 02 2010 - 12:32 AM

I love Independance Day, but I completely agree with Ron on the Pullman speach scene - what a hokey waste of celluloid!  My kids send my out of the room now when we watch it.  I used to go apoloetic when it came on, now I just just laugh and mock.

Worst film is tough.  Thowing out out all the truly bad films ... I guess I'd have to say Citizen Kane.  And that's because I keep watching it trying to figure out why people like the thing, and I can't find any pleasure in it at all.  (Okay, I confess I like the sympathy pull of "Rosebud".)  I understand how it introduced a lot of modern film techniques, so as a teching tool it's great; but I never feel like I'm drawn into the film.  So I hate it for sucking me into wasting my time every 3 or 4 years.



#27 of 271 OFFLINE   Walter Kittel

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Posted December 02 2010 - 03:14 AM

Re: Volcano


Yes, it is awful.  Whenever you see an animal escape harm in a film in what is essentially a throw away scene, while any number of people are dying then you know that you are viewing the work of a hack director.  Volcano and Michael Bay's Pearl Harbor both resort to this manipulative flim-flam.  (Oh, a dog was rescued so we -the audience- can feel good for a moment despite all of the chaos; never mind that scores of individuals have lost their lives in the most horrible ways.)


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#28 of 271 OFFLINE   Steve Christou

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Posted December 02 2010 - 03:46 AM

I lik thiss thred. Armoggeddin and the Independents Days is I hate the more. Broos Willys shoud stik to the Leethol Wepons films, he is goot wif the guns not fly in rokket wif Geoff Golbloom.




Oh I can't think of a film I really hate that much, I'm just not a hater... I like (and own) most of the films mentioned in this thread. Let me think..hmmm . Antichrist was a film I saw once and never again, recently I saw Stone which was pretty awful... um Zardoz was a bit of a stinker... I can't think of any more right now...


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#29 of 271 OFFLINE   Richard--W

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:02 AM

What's not to love about Zardoz?  A sci-fi adventure-dystopian-satire shot by Geoffrey Unsworth and starring Charlotte Rampling and Sean Connery and the wizard of Oz? I even found the paperback, written by the director John Boorman, a fun read. It could only have been made in the seventies.



#30 of 271 OFFLINE   WillG

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:06 AM


 But it was at the end of the film, when everyone was covered with ash, and the little girl said "Look, Mommy.  Everyone's the same!" to bring to a close the racial tensions of the film

Oh man was that bad. Every time I'm reminded of that scene, I picture some screewriter patting himself on the back beliving what a "clever" allegory he just wrote. But the other problem is just that there was no need to introduce the racial tension in the first place. Just some hack attempt at social commentary.

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#31 of 271 OFFLINE   Russell G

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:12 AM

I love hate threads!  some of my favorite films are hated!  Everything by Kubrick?? Bwaa ha haa!!!  I'm surprised John Waters films like "Pink Flamingos" haven't been mentioned yet. :P


That said, my most detested film is "Cars" by Pixar.  I love Pixar and everything they've done. Other then "Cars".  "Cars" was a huge blunder and fly's it's inept pandering in the face of all that is great with the studio.  Instead of timeless story telling with themes identifiable to anyone, you get a bunch of asshole cars acting like assholes for the lowest common denominator of Nascar fans.  The premise doesn't even make sense, and the minutes feel like years before the eye-rape is over.  I will never watch this film again.  

Of course, Pixar decided to make a sequel that I will not be seeing.  Listen John Lasseter, just because you enjoy watching goons turn left for 6 hour increments doesn't mean you should sully your studios image with these abysmal, offensive snooze fests!  And someone kill Larry The Cable Guy already so we don't have to suffer anymore cinema atrocities!

Ok, I got that off my chest... PHEW!  :P



#32 of 271 OFFLINE   Steve Christou

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:16 AM



Originally Posted by Richard--W 

What's not to love about Zardoz?  A sci-fi adventure-dystopian-satire shot by Geoffrey Unsworth and starring Charlotte Rampling and Sean Connery and the wizard of Oz? I even found the paperback, written by the director John Boorman, a fun read. It could only have been made in the seventies.


Richard, you're not related to Jack Briggs by any chance? ;) I'm sure taken in the right spirit (or with spirits) Zardoz might be a good laugh. I bought the DVD after some of my fellow inmates assured it me it was worth giving it a second chance. I first saw Zardoz on VHS back in the 80's and thought Plan 9 from Outer Space finally had some serious competition. The funny thing is I've posted more images from Zardoz on the forum than any other member so maybe subconsciously... nah. Posted Image


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#33 of 271 OFFLINE   TheBat

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:26 AM

I am much of a movie fan as the next person. I have seen some really great films and some really crappy shitty movies.. the one that really pisses me off the most is van helsing from 2004. that truely was a peice of shit. things like tf 2 and id4 looks like oscar winners in comparasion. it was just terrible. as you can see I am still not over it yet. that is how bad it is.


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#34 of 271 OFFLINE   Russell G

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:36 AM

Originally Posted by TheBat 

 the one that really pisses me off the most is van helsing from 2004. that truely was a peice of shit. things like tf 2 and id4 looks like oscar winners in comparasion. it was just terrible. as you can see I am still not over it yet. that is how bad it is.


Jacob


I share the hate for Van Helsing.  I was never a Stephen Sommers fan, but that was the last straw for me and his films.


#35 of 271 OFFLINE   mattCR

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Posted December 02 2010 - 04:49 AM

I can't remember Volcano.. was it the one with Pierce Brosnan somewhere near Mt. St. Helens, or was it the one with the Volcano in LA and them building a trench to the Ocean with Tommy Lee Jones?


(BTW, this is my wry "I hate it when they do two movies on the exact same freaking concept in the same year because they have no other idea")


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#36 of 271 OFFLINE   Steve_Pannell

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Posted December 02 2010 - 05:02 AM



Originally Posted by mattCR 

I can't remember Volcano.. was it the one with Pierce Brosnan somewhere near Mt. St. Helens, or was it the one with the Volcano in LA and them building a trench to the Ocean with Tommy Lee Jones?


(BTW, this is my wry "I hate it when they do two movies on the exact same freaking concept in the same year because they have no other idea")



Volcano was the one with Tommy Lee Jones.


Dante's Peak had Pierce Brosnan.



#37 of 271 OFFLINE   Gary Seven

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Posted December 02 2010 - 05:55 AM

All right... I'll say it... The English Patient.  An incredibly boring movie with a-hole adulterous characters I could not have cared less about.  I rented the LD years ago and is one of the only (if not only movie) I turned off in the middle.  I just could not waste any more time with that flick.



#38 of 271 OFFLINE   Russell G

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Posted December 02 2010 - 06:04 AM

Originally Posted by Gary Seven 

All right... I'll say it... The English Patient.  An incredibly boring movie with a-hole adulterous characters I could not have cared less about.  I rented the LD years ago and is one of the only (if not only movie) I turned off in the middle.  I just could not waste any more time with that flick.


I didn't like this one either, for the same reason.  That said, the only film I turned off that I can remember was "Alone In the Dark".  It was funny bad at first, but then it just sucked the energy out of the room.  I don't all out hate it like "cars" though.



#39 of 271 OFFLINE   Brian Borst

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Posted December 02 2010 - 06:11 AM



Originally Posted by WillG 


Quote:
and you have to wonder why they would accept their parts in the first place. Paychecks, I guess. Anyway, the rant's over. I'm just glad I'll never see it again.

Well, I think plenty of actors would give their left nut to be in a James Cameron film. The guy has pretty much redefined cinema with almost every film he's made. That being said I agree with many of the criticisms of Avatar. It's visually stunning, no one is going to argue that, but IMO it's too preachy, cliched and unoriginal for it to be truly enjoyable.


I wouldn't say he redefined cinema, if he did that, then Michael Bay did too. As for working with him, isn't Cameron supposed to be this great dictator when he's directing his movies? That would put me off immediately. I would like to think that if they read the script, they wouldn't have accepted it, but most probably think it's a clever movie, full of deep messages. Or they were promised a percentage of the gross, I don't know.




Originally Posted by Russell G ../../..

I love hate threads!  some of my favorite films are hated!  Everything by Kubrick?? Bwaa ha haa!!!  I'm surprised John Waters films like "Pink Flamingos" haven't been mentioned yet. :P


That said, my most detested film is "Cars" by Pixar.  I love Pixar and everything they've done. Other then "Cars".  "Cars" was a huge blunder and fly's it's inept pandering in the face of all that is great with the studio.  Instead of timeless story telling with themes identifiable to anyone, you get a bunch of asshole cars acting like assholes for the lowest common denominator of Nascar fans.  The premise doesn't even make sense, and the minutes feel like years before the eye-rape is over.  I will never watch this film again.  

Of course, Pixar decided to make a sequel that I will not be seeing.  Listen John Lasseter, just because you enjoy watching goons turn left for 6 hour increments doesn't mean you should sully your studios image with these abysmal, offensive snooze fests!  And someone kill Larry The Cable Guy already so we don't have to suffer anymore cinema atrocities!

Ok, I got that off my chest... PHEW!  :P


Thank you for mentioning this. Every time I want to see it, I keep hoping that somehow the movie turns out to be great, and so far that hasn't happened. Why Pixar would make a sequel to this, but not The Incredibles is something I'll never understand. I only want to see it because Pixar's track record has been great, even (or especially) with their sequels. I've been saying that it can't be worse than the original, and hopefully it'll turn out good, or decent.


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#40 of 271 OFFLINE   WillG

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Posted December 02 2010 - 06:54 AM

 

Quote:
I wouldn't say he redefined cinema, if he did that, then Michael Bay did too. As for working with him, isn't Cameron supposed to be this great dictator when he's directing his movies? That would put me off immediately.
 


I think there’s a difference between Bay and Cameron. Sure Bay does things big and loud and creates a good spectacle. But Cameron had been pioneering throughout his career. Think of the Water Tendril in The Abyss. The morphing of the T-1000 and now the 3-D technology of Avatar.


And, sure, Cameron has a reputation for being a tough director to work for. I can’t imagine he’s that bad though. Several high profile actors have worked with him multiple times. I still certainly think that most actors would sell their first born to be in one of his movies.


STOP HIM! He's supposed to die!





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