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Question for those w/kids...


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#1 of 8 OFFLINE   Patrick G

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Posted May 22 2006 - 07:36 AM

Question for those with 2 or more kids…

We have a newer 3-bedroom house. We also have a 4-month old boy, and are expecting a little girl in August (the boy was adopted). In the house, my wife and I are occupying 1 bedroom, the boy is in his own room (the nursery), and we have a furnished guest bedroom. We can’t decide what to do with the girl when she arrives in August. Do we put them both in the same room? Do we just add a crib to the guest bedroom? Do we sell the furniture in the guest bedroom (which we plan on replacing anyway) and turn it into a 2nd nursery?

If I had room to store the queen mattress & box springs from the guest bedroom, I would probably turn it into a 2nd nursery since we plan on giving away/selling the furniture in that room anyway, and replacing it with new. However, we don’t have the room to store the mattress and box springs.

We think it would be a bad idea to put them in the same room because we’re afraid that if one wakes up in the middle of the night, he/she (more likely she) will keep the other awake.

Any advice?
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#2 of 8 OFFLINE   Orlando

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Posted May 22 2006 - 09:02 AM

I have two but the ages are seven years apart. I say put them in the same room until the oldest one gets out of the crib. Then put them in seperate rooms. One of the worse things you can do for a baby is get them used to absolute quiet then they wake up for evey little nosie. However if you let them sleep during the day and leave the TV and start vacuuming and stuff like that they learn to ignore it. And sleep really well.

#3 of 8 OFFLINE   Eric_L

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Posted May 22 2006 - 01:00 PM

I say ditch the huest room fast. When our second son was born he slept in a crib in the master bedroom until he was about two then he started sharing a room with his 1 yr older brother. They are 8 and 9 now and still would never consider their own rooms.
Our daughter slept in the crib until hurricane Charley. Then we had no choice but to let her sleep in our room until she was almost four. (two bedroom rental) Once she finally got her own room it took a LONG time to wean her into sleeping alone.
So, unless you plan to have them share a room with each other or you until they are almost teenagers - I would say the sooner you get her in her own room the better.
Don't wast the money on new furniture for the guestroom - spend it on a hide-away for the living room. Guests will only need the bedroom once in a while - your daughter will need a bedroom every night.

#4 of 8 OFFLINE   Todd Hochard

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Posted May 22 2006 - 01:28 PM

Another vote for the girl getting her own room. When my 2nd, a boy, was born in Dec '03, we were living in a 3 bedroom house in FL, and we never really considered having him share a room with his big sister (she was 2.5 at the time). Sure, we could have kept the guest bed (which we had bought just 3 years earlier), but we felt strongly that they each needed their own space. I would think the sleep issue would be a big one with such small kids- although, both of our kids were very good sleepers, for the most part.

Todd
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#5 of 8 OFFLINE   Paul D G

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Posted May 22 2006 - 07:38 PM

Not giving direct advice, just giving experience.

We had a two bedroom house where the 2nd bedroom was an office. We had the crib in the master bedroom. We built an addition to house the office and when that was done we moved our son into his own room - he was about 1 year old. We didn't have any major problems having him in our room. Sometimes we had to pretend we were asleep if he woke up otherwise he'd want attention but it wasn't a big deal nor a nightly thing.

When we had our second we did the same thing - kept him in our room. We moved into a bigger house a few months later and there was no issues having him suddenly sleeping alone (ie: he didnt cry because he couldnt see/sense us in the room).

I can't really see a problem having an 8 month sharing with a newborn but you might want to keep the newborn in your room for a few weeks to see how her sleeping habits are* then you can decide if they can share or should be seperated.

However, since you already have a spare room just use it as a nursery. It doesn't have to be a nursery proper right now (unless the bed takes up too much space).

-paul
* there is another thread where people gave advice to a pending new dad. I give the same advice - disregard what the nurses say about feeding every two hours. Don't wake a sleeping baby to feed. If she's hungry she'll let you know. Waking her every two hours will only train her to be fed every two hours. Both our kids slept thru the night (or at least MOST of the night) within a week or two of bringing them home. If your new daughter can sleep most of the night then it's probably ok to move her in with your son.

#6 of 8 OFFLINE   Lucia Duran

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Posted May 23 2006 - 01:43 PM

babies don't need absolute quiet to sleep. In the womb, it is so noisy and they are use to it from day one! I say let them share a room until they are older.
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#7 of 8 OFFLINE   DanielKellmii

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Posted May 23 2006 - 02:53 PM

Do what you think is best. If that doesn't work out, try the other way. Fortunetly, you can always change your mind.

#8 of 8 OFFLINE   andrew markworthy

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Posted May 23 2006 - 10:55 PM

FWIW, we were in the same situation. The 2nd child (a girl - the first was a boy) slept in a crib in our room at first and then she moved into her own room.

As for guests, we've used a couple of options:

(1) when the kids were relatively small and we had a 3 bed house, we put both kids in the same bedroom (we're lucky that they generally don't squabble), giving one of the rooms to the guests. In the larger of the two kids' rooms, we put a single bed that can convert to a double bed (these are easy to buy in the UK, so I guess you can get them in the USA as well) for when guests stay. For most of the time, it was a single bed.

(2) The kids are now older and we've moved house, but the same situation still applies (we got a four bed house but our daughter commandeered bedrooms 3 and 4 - in fairness, they are both tiny and a double bed would be a real squeeze in either of them). We have an extra bed in the study (in our case a futon which when not in use is rolled up in a wardrobe, and which we find comfortable, but a sofa bed would function just as well). If the guests are relatively young, they get the futon. If they're older, then they get our bedroom and we use the futon.

I think it all depends how many visitors you have to put up each year that determines how much trouble you need to go to.

There is another solution which is novel and not as bizarre as it first sounds. Some friends of my parents have done this and by all accounts it works well. In any one year they reckoned to have guests sleep over maybe four nights. They had found a dream cottage, which they really wanted to buy, but it only had one bedroom. How to solve the guest sleeping problem? Simple - they bought the dream cottage, and now put guests up in a nearby hotel. The annual hotel bill is circa £200 (I'd imagine it's way cheaper in the USA), and works out a lot less expensive than having to buy a bigger house just for the sake of a bedroom used four nights a year.