Mark Dill
Stunt Coordinator
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2005
- Messages
- 148
Just wondering if anyone could shed some light on this situation with a coworker. She is Pakistani and a Muslim, but not sure if that matters.
Anyway, we normally get along pretty well, but she has strange opinions about certain things. One of these things is astrology. Another is my son, Ryan. (not his real name) One time I was showing her his baby pictures and she was oo-ing and ah-ing over them in a normal fashion and then I said, "None of these pictures are very recent, let me find a more recent one for you." I found the most recent one I had, which was him at 14 months. When she saw it she immediately said, "Oh what happened, he looks weaker!" I thought... ok... this is just one of those things where she does not realize exactly what she is saying - maybe she means "thinner" or something. I said, "Haha, no, he is just turning into a toddler, losing his baby fat, that's what happens as they get older." So I didn't think too much of it then.
I should pause here to mention that my son is the most normal of all normal kids. He has blond hair and hazel eyes - he is in the 90th percentile for height and 60th percentile for weight - so I guess you could say he is tall for his age but other than that he is totally an average american little kid.
Just yesterday, I was showing her pictures of my friend's son who is the same age as mine (19 months now) and I mentioned "He's really tall, I think he is even a little taller than Ryan." She immediately said, "Well, I'm not surprised, Ryan is a weak kid." I said, "Huh? What do you mean?" She said, "He's weaker, you know, he's small, he's not a strong kid." I sat there dumbfounded for a second and then I said, "That's not very nice, you know. You're telling me my son is weak. And you have no idea what you're talking about - he is above average for both weight and height." She was shocked that I was offended. And I was shocked that she was surprised that her comment bothered me.
So what the heck??? Is it common in the Muslim world for someone to say, "Your kid is weak" to a friend? I don't care if my friend's kid had cerebral palsy and was under 2 pounds, I would NEVER say that to a friend. Seems unbelievably rude to me. But she seemed to think nothing of it. Any ideas here? Or any insight at all would be appreciated. I'm wondering if maybe she is just not used to seeing "tall" American kids? Maybe short little middle eastern kids keep their baby fat longer? And even if that was the case, why would you SAY that? I dunno, I am at a loss.
Anyway, we normally get along pretty well, but she has strange opinions about certain things. One of these things is astrology. Another is my son, Ryan. (not his real name) One time I was showing her his baby pictures and she was oo-ing and ah-ing over them in a normal fashion and then I said, "None of these pictures are very recent, let me find a more recent one for you." I found the most recent one I had, which was him at 14 months. When she saw it she immediately said, "Oh what happened, he looks weaker!" I thought... ok... this is just one of those things where she does not realize exactly what she is saying - maybe she means "thinner" or something. I said, "Haha, no, he is just turning into a toddler, losing his baby fat, that's what happens as they get older." So I didn't think too much of it then.
I should pause here to mention that my son is the most normal of all normal kids. He has blond hair and hazel eyes - he is in the 90th percentile for height and 60th percentile for weight - so I guess you could say he is tall for his age but other than that he is totally an average american little kid.
Just yesterday, I was showing her pictures of my friend's son who is the same age as mine (19 months now) and I mentioned "He's really tall, I think he is even a little taller than Ryan." She immediately said, "Well, I'm not surprised, Ryan is a weak kid." I said, "Huh? What do you mean?" She said, "He's weaker, you know, he's small, he's not a strong kid." I sat there dumbfounded for a second and then I said, "That's not very nice, you know. You're telling me my son is weak. And you have no idea what you're talking about - he is above average for both weight and height." She was shocked that I was offended. And I was shocked that she was surprised that her comment bothered me.
So what the heck??? Is it common in the Muslim world for someone to say, "Your kid is weak" to a friend? I don't care if my friend's kid had cerebral palsy and was under 2 pounds, I would NEVER say that to a friend. Seems unbelievably rude to me. But she seemed to think nothing of it. Any ideas here? Or any insight at all would be appreciated. I'm wondering if maybe she is just not used to seeing "tall" American kids? Maybe short little middle eastern kids keep their baby fat longer? And even if that was the case, why would you SAY that? I dunno, I am at a loss.