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"Worst Movie Ever" Thread

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#1 of 49 Guest_Andrew_A_Paul_*

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Posted May 01 2004 - 05:47 AM

My roommate rented "house of the dead" tonight. This has to be the "worst movie ever.... ever" Actually we watched Gothica first, and after watching that i thought i was going to have nightmares, but then we watched "house of the dead" I just laughed all night. Posted Image I'm thinking about revoking his movie renting privilages.

Do we have any other top nominees for worst movie ever?

#2 of 49 OFFLINE   Jack Briggs

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Posted May 01 2004 - 05:58 AM

Let's do this thread here in Polls. And, buddy, this topic (along with variants) has been done to death.

#3 of 49 OFFLINE   Jay Taylor

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Posted May 01 2004 - 06:44 AM

"The Lost Continent" (1968)(Among the Worst of The Hammer Collection) Although if you're drunk enough I suppose this one could be amusing in that it's so bad it's funny. Legally Blonde 2: Red White & Blonde. There's not enough booze in the world to make this film entertaining. I can't believe I bought both of these on DVD.
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#4 of 49 OFFLINE   Casey Trowbridg

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Posted May 01 2004 - 07:38 AM

If Hulk Hogan is in a starring role...it sucks. Worst of the awful though Santa with Muscles.

#5 of 49 OFFLINE   george kaplan

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Posted May 01 2004 - 07:48 AM

I'll put in my usual obligatory vote for Cries & Whispers. Technically impressive, but the most obtuse, irritating and downright horrible excuse for a story ever put on film, IMO. Hell, it makes Tarkovsky's The Mirror look like a straightforward linear story. Posted Image
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#6 of 49 OFFLINE   Chris


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Posted May 01 2004 - 08:33 AM

Short Circuit 2 Postcards from the Edge HeMan the Movie and yes, on this next one, I'll get ripped, because I love the rest of his films, but here I agree with Kevin Smith: Magnolia While it has 'moments' it's so overwrought, long and obtuse that it continously screams: "look at me, I'm art!" rather then "I want to tell a good story!"
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#7 of 49 OFFLINE   Christ Reynolds

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Posted May 01 2004 - 08:51 AM

magnolia eh? i wont rip on you for that, just strongly disagree. i know what you mean about wanting to be artsy, but i think the movie pulls it off. but i think the critical sentence is
i enjoy some of his films, but i just dont think they are very good. and i cant stand the dialogue in them. almost nobody i know is as wordy and intellectual-sounding as some of his characters. normal people, who are the majority of the characters in his films, simply do not speak that way. as artsy as kevin smith thinks magnolia is, that is how much i think his films are overly wordy. but i am torn, because they make me laugh, and some are pretty good. i'd have to say the worst movies i have seen are the police academy movies. and i am torn there too, because they make me laugh (in a pity sort of way). they are one of my guilty pleasures. i KNOW they suck, but i watch them anyway Posted Image
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#8 of 49 OFFLINE   Chris


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Posted May 01 2004 - 10:41 AM

Neh, Kevin isn't the God of film.. his stuff is OK, it's not my favorite, but I've enjoyed it at times.. But his review of Magnolia sung to me when he said "overly pretentious without getting to a f***ing point" I thought: Yep. I love PT Anderson, and found "Boogie Nights" and "Punch Drunk Love" to be very good.. but Magnolia I sat through the whole thing hoping it would click together.. and it just didn't.
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#9 of 49 OFFLINE   Scott Weinberg

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Posted May 01 2004 - 11:21 AM

My "Worst Movies Ever"

Boat Trip
Boxing Helena
The Doom Generation
From Justin to Kelly
The Haunting
Batman & Robin
Patch Adams

...and about 439 others. Posted Image

#10 of 49 OFFLINE   Steve Christou

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Posted May 01 2004 - 12:01 PM

Another vote for Magnolia... ...and all the Friday the 13th's. ...a trio of Scary Movies... ...add a Blair Witch or two... ...Virus... anyone unlucky enough to see this? ...and I'll throw in a bunch of painfully unfunny Robin Williams man/child 'comedies'

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#11 of 49 OFFLINE   Scott Weinberg

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Posted May 01 2004 - 12:06 PM

I've seen Virus...theatrically too! Posted Image

And you're right, Steve. It's astonishingly bad.

#12 of 49 OFFLINE   Rob P S

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Posted May 01 2004 - 02:27 PM

In my opinion...

The Blair Witch Project
The Thin Red Line
Money Train
A Time to Kill
Very Bad Things
The Toy
Look Who's Talking
Happy Birthday to Me
Halloween 2, 4, 5, and 6
American Pie
Uncle Buck
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Dirty Work
LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring
Mac and Me
An Eye for an Eye - the Sally Field/Kiefer Sutherland one
Fire Birds
Friday the 13th Part 3 and 6

#13 of 49 OFFLINE   ZacharyTait



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Posted May 01 2004 - 06:39 PM

Whoa! This is an interesting list. I would disagree with the following: The Blair Witch Project The Thin Red Line A Time to Kill American Pie Hellboy Ferris Bueller's Day Off LOTR: FOTR and TTT and ROTK The last two are in my top 25 of all time. By that I mean Ferris and all three Lord of the Rings. Hellboy was fun to watch. Money Train, Uncle Buck, and Porky's were disposable entertainment to me. I don't hate them, but I don't love them. Look's who Talking and Dirty Work are bad, but not horrible. Very Bad Things I would agree with you on. By the end, I just wanted to jump in the shower to get the filth off of me. I haven't seen Halloween 2, 4,5 and 6, Carpool, The Toy, and Happy Birthday to Me. Some of my nominees for worst movie would be: Battlefield Earth Showgirls Freddie got Fingered Life of David Gale Patch Adams Dragonfly The worst movie of all time for me is: Bonfire of the Vanities. I still can't believe that A-list talent such as Tom Hanks, Morgan Freeman, Bruce Willis, and Brian DePalma managed to make such a shitburger. Reading the book "The Devil's Candy" helped me understand why it was done so badly. Fortunately the guys I mentioned redeemed themselves in some way or another. Freeman with Shawshank, Willis with Pulp Fiction, Hanks with Philadelphia, and DePalma with Mission: Impossible.

#14 of 49 OFFLINE   Ryan Wishton

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Posted May 01 2004 - 10:08 PM

I find it kind of funny that people here thought one movie was the worst movie ever. So, they continued to watch all of their sequels. A worst movie ever to me is something so putrid and horrible that you would never want to see anything to do with it again. It's horribly boring, you keep pressing the fast forward button, etc. No value even in a bad way. If I thought I just saw the worst movie ever that was painful to sit through, I wouldnt have any interest in continuing. I mean I loathed the movie KillJoy. I certainly didnt run out to see KillJoy 2. This I can truly say is one of the worst movies ever. No fun, No laughs, No scares. Just nothing. The Mangler, The Matrix 2, The Star Wars prequels (the 1st prequel was enough for me), and many more, I dont care much for either. Even though I dont like those, I still probably couldnt say they are the worst movies ever. Movies like House of the Dead are extremely and painfully bad. But, I laughed too much at the nonsense so I just cant consider it the worst movie ever. Worst Movie ever to me is something that gives no fun or value whatsoever in a good or a bad way. Something that is just so horribly painful to sit through that it actually makes you want to cry for your mommy.

#15 of 49 OFFLINE   Dustin Harrison

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Posted May 01 2004 - 10:33 PM

house of 1000 corps. I can't believe I watched the whole thing. Oh, and I just tried to watch The Order, got about halfway through and turned it off.

#16 of 49 OFFLINE   Mark Barnhill

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Posted May 02 2004 - 02:19 AM

The Perfect Storm has to the be worst film I can remember seeing. I had to actually force myself to sit through the thing, all the time saying, "something has to happen soon, this HAS to get better..." IT DIDN'T I have purchased some bad films, but this one is destined to be the dust collector of my collection. It will never be watched again.
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#17 of 49 OFFLINE   andrew markworthy

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Posted May 02 2004 - 02:37 AM

I know - any movie without Bruce Willis just sucks. Posted Image

#18 of 49 OFFLINE   Ike



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Posted May 02 2004 - 04:52 AM

Part of the reason you may not like it is because you use obtuse as a pejorative.

#19 of 49 OFFLINE   Christ Reynolds

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Posted May 02 2004 - 08:49 AM

to be honest, i felt the same way after i saw it in the theater. i rented it when it came out on dvd, and really started to like it. i bought it and then liked it even more after repeated viewings. maybe it is a 'short cuts' ripoff, but i still like it. and not because it is supposed to be artsy, i didnt find it to be overly such. i'm not easily impressed in that department anyway. i thought punch drunk love was pretty good too, but i absolutely love boogie nights, i think it is the greatest movie since sliced...porno. i'm glad boogie nights was made before magnolia, i think it may have suffered from the over-stylization that some of you say magnolia suffers from. i like boogie nights the way it is. CJ
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#20 of 49 OFFLINE   Matt Pelham

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Posted May 02 2004 - 10:41 AM

Troll 2 - worst movie ever, but I love it and have watched it countless times.

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