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Lord of the Rings: The Stage Version - On its way!


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#1 of 29 Scott Weinberg

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Posted May 28 2003 - 07:55 AM

Got this news from the This is London website:

An adaptation of Tolkien's trilogy is due to open at the beginning of 2005 and will cost £1.5 million more than Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, until now the biggestbudget musical in the capital.

Eventually it is hoped the production will roll out across the world.

Backed by US svengali Saul Zaentz, who owns the film and stage rights to the fantasy, the musical will be directed by Matthew Warchus - the man in charge of the current hit Our House - and produced by Kevin Wallace.

What lyricist and writer Shaun McKenna will find to rhyme with Gollum, Frodo or even Brandybuck has yet to be seen - but Mr Wallace is promising one of the most spectacular productions ever.

"I want it to be a landmark," he told the Standard. "When you put a piece of literature with such a worldwide profile on the stage you need to make something utterly extraordinary."

Oh well. At least it's not Andrew Lloyd Webber. Posted Image

#2 of 29 Ricardo C

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Posted May 28 2003 - 08:02 AM

I'm very afraid.
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#3 of 29 Chris Atkins

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Posted May 28 2003 - 08:02 AM

What's wrong, Ricardo?

Can't wait to see the Orcs do a chorus line?

#4 of 29 Ricardo C

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Posted May 28 2003 - 08:11 AM

It's Saruman's cabaret number I'm worried about Posted Image
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#5 of 29 Chris Atkins

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Posted May 28 2003 - 08:13 AM

I am looking forward to Frodo "Jean Valjean" Baggins myself....Posted Image

#6 of 29 Sean Laughter

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Posted May 28 2003 - 09:02 AM

Well, there is a musical based on "The Hobbit" you know.

#7 of 29 John_Berger

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Posted May 28 2003 - 09:21 AM

One ...
... single ring of power.
Taints men every chance it gets.
{dee dee dee dee dee dee dee}

One ...
... kindly little hobbit.
Running from Sauron's pets.
{dee dee dee dee dee}

One wraith and suddenly all of his fears come true.

You know that ring will corrupt him like you .. know .. who ..

One ...

#8 of 29 Chris Farmer

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Posted May 28 2003 - 12:51 PM

So when do we get to see Legolas' nude rendition of Silmarillion: The Musical?

For those not in the know, read The Very Secret Diaries.

#9 of 29 Ricardo C

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Posted May 28 2003 - 12:58 PM

Does Gandalf's "pointy hat trick" go against HTF regulations? Posted Image
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#10 of 29 Lou Sytsma

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Posted May 28 2003 - 01:09 PM

Cripes! How long do they plan on making this?

They could barely cover the high points.
Every man is my superior, in that I may learn from him.

#11 of 29 Claire Panke

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Posted May 28 2003 - 08:28 PM

Applause for John.

LOTR, the musical? Run away, run away...

#12 of 29 Craig S

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Posted May 29 2003 - 01:21 AM

"Springtime for Sauron and Mo-ordor..."

I am having trouble imagining a scenario in which this won't suck... Posted Image

Now if they made a musical of the Harvard Lampoon's classic parody "Bored of the Rings"... THAT could work!

Three truths about movies, as noted by Roger Ebert:

 

* It's not what a movie is about, it's how it is about it.

* No good movie is too long, and no bad movie is short enough.

* No good movie is depressing, all bad movies are depressing.


#13 of 29 John_Berger

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Posted May 29 2003 - 02:41 AM

Quote:
Applause for John.
{ bowing low } Thank you, thank you.

And for our next number...

"There's no business like orc business.
Like no business I know.

Hunting 'round for man-flesh is appealing.
Slashing men and elves and dwarves is fun.
Running after hobbits is endearing
When they are fearing
The evil One."

Posted Image

#14 of 29 Claire Panke

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Posted May 29 2003 - 02:56 AM

John, Broadway is calling...

#15 of 29 DavidBL

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Posted May 29 2003 - 03:33 AM

This looks more like it should be a "Simpsons" parody than a real production, a la "Planet of the Apes-- The Musical."

I hate every ape I see, from chimpan-A to chimpan-Z...

#16 of 29 John_Berger

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Posted May 29 2003 - 03:49 AM

Quote:
John, Broadway is calling...
Are you sure that's not Weird Al Yankovic you're hearing? Posted Image

#17 of 29 Seth Paxton

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Posted May 29 2003 - 04:30 AM

John,

I figured this production would try to take advantage of more than one recent Oscar film.

Consider the part where Sam describes a critical scene from Return of the King...

Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes they both
Oh yes, they both
Oh yes, they both reached for
The ring, the ring, the ring, the ring,
Oh yes, they both reached for the ring
for the ring.

#18 of 29 Chuck Mayer

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Posted May 29 2003 - 04:46 AM

This is the singlest GREATEST idea I have ever heard!

I am already planning to fly to London for the premiere, first class, all the way Posted Image

It seems silly (because it is), but so was making the film. Just another medium for the tale.

And no, I probably won't catch it Posted Image

Take care,
Chuck
Hey buddy...did you just see a real bright light?

#19 of 29 Craig S

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Posted May 29 2003 - 05:19 AM

OK, I gotta get in on this...

This next number works best if you mispronounce the subject... Posted Image
Quote:
FRODO
(spoken)
Moria . . .
(sings)
The most horrible place I've ever been:
Moria, Moria, Moria, Moria . . .
All the nasty creatures of the world in a single place . .
Moria, Moria, Moria, Moria . . .

Moria!
We just spent some time in Moria,
That Pippin's such a dork
He summoned up some orcs -
Not shrewd.

Moria!
We got the hell out of Moria,
But we're not feeling great
Our nine is now eight -
We're screwed!

Moria!
That Balrog dragged down our wizard,
I guess we should have stayed in the blizzard.

Moria,
We'll never go back to Moria!

The dwarves can keep their city in
Moria.
Should bring the house down. Posted Image

Keep 'em coming, folks! We should have this whole thing written by the end of the day!

Edited to (hopefully) improve one stanza.

Three truths about movies, as noted by Roger Ebert:

 

* It's not what a movie is about, it's how it is about it.

* No good movie is too long, and no bad movie is short enough.

* No good movie is depressing, all bad movies are depressing.


#20 of 29 Jordan_E

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Posted May 29 2003 - 05:26 AM

The only time I ever heard RINGS put to music well was in a Led Zeppelin song, like RAMBLE ON or MISTY MOUNTAIN HOP, although that one has little to do with RINGS.
And you believe, at heart, everyone's a killer...




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