Your favorite TV quotes of all time (1 Viewer)

[Richard V]

Some Happy Days quotes:

"Aayyyyyyyyyyyyy"

"I found my freedom..."

"Sit on it"

"I've still got it"

Others: (some are paraphrased)

"This is the city, Los Angeles, my partner's name is Gannon, I carry a badge, my name is Friday"

"Good morning Mr. Phelps, your mission, should you decide to accept it...."

"Book 'em Dann-O"

"You unlock this door, with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into......The Twilight Zone".

 

[Rick Thompson]

Hill Street Blues --

Furillo: "With all due respect, ma'am, a number of your students have already 'interfaced with the police experience'."

Law & Order (in Lennie Briscoe's first scene) --

Mike Logan: "You're late. Don't you have a pager?"
Lennie: "What I was doing, I don't wear a pager."

Remington Steele --

Remington: "You're the abbott of Costello?"

Saving the best for last, the Mary Tyler Moore Show --

Lou Grant: "I have learned how to delegate...blame."

 

[Roy Wall]

"One of these days Alice......Bang.....Zoom!!!!" - Ralph Kramden (Jackie Gleason) - "The Honeymooners"

The all-time classic.

 

[David Weicker]

SOAPMary: Jodie is going to be a father.Jessica: Dennis is pregnant?!?! REMINGTON STEELELaura : Murphy, he's got the gold!Murphy : GOLD

 

[Rob_Ray]

Mine's also from I LOVE LUCY, which to paraphrase the introduction to "The Song of Bernadette": For those who know, no explanation is necessary; for those who don't know, no explanation is possible.

Anyway -- whenever someone tells me a rumor or gossip or something not too serious, I say, "Wait till Mickey Richardson hears about this!"

And you could have knocked me over with a feather once when I asked an ILL fan what his favorite line from the series was, and he said the same exact line!

I love the Mickey Richardson line too, especially since a friend who is a major Lucy fan has Richardson as his last name.

Another favorite line which I have quoted from time to time when appropriate is another one which isn't so funny on its own but is timed perfectly by Vivian Vance in "The Fashion Show" as a comment on Lucy's over-the-top attempt at a dropping a hint: "Well THAT was a subtle performance!"

 

[oldtvshowbuff]

I've heard this quote from a Wagon Train episode titled "The Colter Craven Story"."At $30 a month, I ain't paid to think". A quote from Bill Hawks.From Wanted, Dead or Alive, Josh Randall would tell his prisoner that he had picked up on a bounty, "Let's go."

 

[Ron1973]

Granny insisted an Indian fight was going to happen and insisted she needed John Wayne. After the fake attack, John did make a cameo. Granny's respone?"Where was ya when I needed ya, John?"

 

[BobO'Link]

"He's dead, Jim."
"Work!?!!"
"Nip it in the bud!"
"Jane, you ignorant slut."
"Sock it to me"
"Look *that* up in your Funk & Wagnalls."
"Mom always liked you best."
"Say good night, Gracie."
"You rang?"
"Exit, stage right..."
"And now here's something we hope you'll really enjoy."
"Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat."
"Hokey smoke."

If you don't know the shows you're *not* a "true" TV fan!

 

[JohnMor]

"I HATE spunk!"

 

[MaxMorrow]

"Diane, I'm holding in my hand a small box of chocolate bunnies."

 

[Ron1973]

Lucy: Everybody knows that Jack Benny doesn't trust banks. He keeps all his money in his house. If we could get his business we could get everyone else's business!

Mr. Mooney: If we could get Jack Benny's business, we wouldn't need anyone else's business!

 

[MishaLauenstein]

Jessica Tate: Chester! You're not a negro!

Judge: I order you to be taken from this courtroom to a place of incarceration ... after which you will be hung by the neck until dead.
Frog Rothchild Jr.: And then what?

Dr. Craig: Cathy Martin, that wacko in pathology?
Victor Ehrlich: Frankly sir, I'm envious. I've been wanting to get to know her better for quite some time.
Dr. Craig: Victor, the woman is a turnip.
Victor Ehrlich: Mother always said to chew my vegetables.
Dr. Craig: You're a pig, Ehrlich.

Hillary Tattinger: It's another Mexican stand.

Harley Estin: I'll give you fifty cents for it.

Kirk Cranston: You may lick the cop.

Lucille Tarlek: Life is mysterious, isn't it Herb?

 

[Ejanss]

Again, among the many Flintstones lines that have sunk into my childhood subconscious and now appear in my daily life was the episode where Fred and Barney have to sneak out of the house for dance lessons:
---
Receptionist: "We are now taking students for our one year all-inclusive course."
Fred: "One year? We don't have that long!"
Receptionist: "Well, we do have a few spaces open on our six-month course. However, this does not include the Hopi Indian Rain Dance...And if you ever met a Hopi Indian, you'd just be out of luck."
Fred: "We'll take that chance, we've only got a week."
---
(Every time I've had phone or Comcast reps try to talk me out of why I "wouldn't want" the cheaper deal for why it's not as good a bargain, I keep straining not to make Hopi Indian jokes. )

 

[oldtvshowbuff]

"An actual account taken from the pages of my newspaper, The Tombstone Epitaph, this is the way it happened in the town too tough to die."

"From the colorful life of Bat Masterson, the man who became a legend in his own time."

Quotes from a pair of Ziv westerns.

 

[DaveF]

"That's the kind of woolly-headed liberal thinking that leads to getting eaten by werewolves." -- Principal Snyder, on Buffy the Vampire Slay

"I'm taking this loop off." -- Col. Jack O'Neill to Teal'c, about not playing along during one iteration of his own personal Groundhog Day

"It's a thought...with another thought's hat on." -- Britta explaining analogies on Community

"You make me angry" - Emil Skoda, on Law & Order, provoking a psychopath

"Good news everyone!" -- The Professor, on Futurama

"That is not how windmills work!" -- Morbo the Newsmonster, to Sheila, about how windmills can't help global warming.

 

[rjd0309]

The quote I'm going to provide is from a lesser known Western, but it also fits the bill, and it's the first thing that comes to mind whenever I think of the show "Guns of Will Sonnett". Walter Brennan saying "No brag... just fact."

I frequently use this quote in my daily life.

 

[Jack P]

For Flintstones episodes two quotes stand out.

"Everybody into the PYOOL!"

And Fred trying to read "One Way" sign.

"It says, 'oh-nee way.'"

 

[Doug Wallen]

"Logical!"
"Fascinating!"
"Energize!"
"Engage!"
"Make it so!"
"Good Evening!"
"Good night, Chet."
"...and that's the way it is!"

Doug

 

[Dave Lawrence]

"So I gave you power, huh? Well let me tell you something, boy... If I did give you power, you've got NOTHIN'! Nobody gives you power. Real power is something you TAKE!"

- Jock Ewing said this to the still inexperienced Bobby, who was temporarily placed in charge of the company after JR's shooting and was confronting Jock in public for using company money to make his own deals without consulting Bobby first. Great quote and great overall scene; one of Jim's best as Jock. (original Dallas)

"Edith, if you're gonna have a change of life, you gotta do it right now. I'm gonna give you just 30 seconds. Now c'mon! Change!"

- Archie's way of dealing with Edith beginning menopause. (All in the Family)

 

[Frank Soyke]

Hogan's Heroes - Major Hochstetter to Colonel Klink (when Hogan invades the conversation)... "What is this man doing here?"