My horrifying movie going experience (2 Viewers)

[Michael Hall]

While it's nowhere near as funny (to us, at least) as Matt's pissing story, I had a rather negative experience while watching "Return of the King" a few weeks back. I am usually one of those "loners" at the theater, but I behave myself because I'm a cheapskate and if I'm going to pay 6-10 dollars for a ticket, I'm damn well going to pay close attention.

This became somewhat difficult at ROTK. One of my friends went with me, and he was sitting on the end to my right. Since the theater was packed on opening night, this guy and his girlfriend come in and sit down next to me (the guy to my immediate left, and her to his left). Well, about ten minutes into the film, the guy squeals out because the girl is sticking her hand down his pants trying to get his junk out. He tells her to calm down because he wants to watch the film. She does for a bit, but like clockwork, every ten minutes, he would jump in his seat toward me, hitting my knee or stepping on my foot, because she was constantly grabbing at his penis. He kept telling her to calm down (and kept apologizing to me), but she just would not give up. To top it all off, during the stair sequence, someone made an honest mistake and forgot to turn their cell phone off. It rang, and the aforementioned girl made the "pot, meet the kettle" comment of the night:

"Well, that was rude." :rolleyes

I'm sure there's a joke in this story somewhere about guys who would rather watch LOTR than be intimate with their significant other, but I'm not going to be the one to make it, since I was more interested in ROTK than I was the attempts at a live sex show in the seat next to me.

 

[Mike Broadman]

Interesting story, Michael.
Didn't that girl then right song about it on her break-through album "Jagged Little Pill?"

 

[Greg_S_H]

I won't make it, either. Besides there being a time and place for everything, I think most normal people are able to compartmentalize a little better than that. Mature relationships include sex, yes, but it should be possible to do things together that don't involve sex at all. Seeing a movie in public, for instance. Strangely enough, millions of guys take millions of girls to the movies every weekend and are able to get through it without inspiring an Alanis Morissette song (thanks, Mike). Personally, she'd be getting cab fare from me.

 

[TedT]

I think I'd almost would rather have someone piss on me than talk during the whole movie. I don't know... it's a toss up.

 

[Ricardo C]

Not a "horrifying" experience, but this was more annoying to me than all the cell phones in the world:

I went to a matineé screening of ROTK today, hoping to avoid a full crowd. I pretty much hit the jackpot and ended up with an audience of 20. I was in heaven, I was sure I'd FINALLY enjoy the film with a minimum of noise. To make things better, I had the row to myself, and only two people sitting in the next one.

Well... Those two people in the next row started GIGGLING at every single thing in the movie. And I mean everything, no matter how dramatic/somber/sad/suspenseful/whatever:

-Andy Serkis' Gollum makeup
-Every time there was a closeup of Aragorn
-Every time Legolas spoke
-Every time Arwen was on screen
-Every time an orc appeared on screen
-The drumming trolls
-Faramir's suicide charge
-The moment the King of the Oathbreakers appeared
-"I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you"
-"For Frodo"
-Aragorn's coronation
-Bilbo asking to see the Ring one last time

There were several others, but these are the ones that bothered me the most. I mean, I could understand heckling a movie you didn't like (I wouldn't approve of it, but I'd understand the emotion), but what makes a grown adult GIGGLE like a schoolgirl at scenes that have no humorous content at all, not even unintentional? And it's not as if they slowly grew tired of the film and started mocking it, the giggling started from the beginning. Seriously, what gives? These weren't even teenagers, they were in their 30s.

All in all, it just made me add a litle extra money to the projector fund :p) The sooner I can have a dedicated theater, the sooner I can stop visiting commercial theaters and putting up with this crap.

 

[Scott Ware]

If there were only 20 people in the theater, why didn't you just move to another seat?

 

[Dennis Pagoulatos]

There was a girl that giggled and chattered like a monkey (a very sexy monkey) if I recall waaay back when I saw Bram Stoker's Dracula whatever year that was (91 or 92?) Anyway that REALLY pissed me off and ruined the whole movie. To this day I still think of that stupid bitch and fume whenever I watch Dracula!

-Dennis

 

[Ricardo C]

1. Because I shouldn't have to.

2. There was no getting away from that. Hell, one of the people shushing them was sitting in the back of the theater (I was on the fifth row, the hyenas were on the fourth)

 

[Michael Hall]

Y'know, between pissing, giggling, and live sex shows, it seems like we've all got reasons to stop going to the theater. I used to look forward to seeing films on the big screen; now I dread what I'm going to have to deal with in order to see them that way. I really want to go see "Big Fish" when it opens this weekend, but I don't know if I am going to be able to bring myself to do so.

It seems like, more and more, people feel the need to have a running commentary when they're watching a movie. This goes beyond "Rocky Horror" audience participation (something that is expected); this is just out and out rudeness. With LOTR coming to an end, and Episode III still over a year away, I think I'm going to be passing up a lot of movies until they reach DVD from here on out.

 

[ThomasC]

I just got back from watching Something's Gotta Give for the second time, and I'm not sure why I didn't catch this the first time, maybe it's because I was in a different theater...

Every time I thought someone's cell phone was going off in the theater, it was actually coming from the movie!

 

[ZacharyTait]

I've done that before. Fortunately, I realized it was from the movie before I embarassed myself and yelled at a non-existent cell phone user.

 

[Scott L]

Bahahahha!!! I go to that exact theater and there was this annoying ass kid right behind me during ROTK. I was the only one that had the nerve to start shushing him. More followed and finally his buddies helped to quiet him down.

I was seriously thinking about flinging my soda at him if he wouldn't shut up! Gotta stop Netflixing the Sopranos.

 

[Jonathan Dagmar]

well this is enlightening. I had no idea to my htf member pissed at the cinema. Come on guys, public theatres are bad enough already...

 

[Tony Whalen]

"The popcorn you're eating has been pissed in...film at 11!"



Sorry Matt... couldn't resist.

 

[Ted Lee]

well, that was your first mistake.

the only theaters i try to go to are the roseville ones ... and (if i'm in the area) natomas. i went once to the new greenback theater, but that's about it.

plus, with my new 65" widescreen, i'm even less likely to put up with stupid people.

case in point, i'm at the theaters with my girlfriend. this man asks these people in front if they could scoot over so he could sit with his wife. one lady looks at him, says her daughter is pregnant and can't move! :rolleyes

i almost said, then how did she get her fat a%% in the seat in the first place.

oh...but i should mention, the family sitting right next to me did slide over so i could sit with my buddies. so...i guess it's just the luck of the draw.

 

[Lew Crippen]

I only very occasionally have this negative experiences in theaters.

Almost never with people, but to be fair, I mostly attend early matinee (or even morning) performances on Saturday and Sunday—where likely the jerks are still sleeping in. .

I did think that the sound (volume, not quality) left a bit to be desired the first time I saw Return of the King. And I occasionally have an issue with focus—the last time, strangely was the lower right hand corner of the screen during The Shop Around the Corner at the Music Box—I took this to mean that the film was not flat as it went across the lens, but that is only speculation on my part.

I’m surprised at the number of negative postings on this subject, as they are at odds with my experience.

 

[Max Leung]

Zach, that reminds me of my recent viewing of Peter Pan (see my post in the Peter Pan discussion thread for more details). I was half-expecting the guy in the front row to cross half the length of the theater and pick a fight with me when I told him to shush (I didn't swear - especially when there were a lot of quiet kids in the theater) a couple of times.

Well at least his girlfriend apologized loudly as the couple walked out of the theater for the third time.

Canadian courtesy is a myth.

 

[Malcolm R]

Have to disagree with you here, the ted.

Once seated, people shouldn't have to move to accomodate late-comers. If they're with a group and they want seats together, get to the theater earlier.

And I wish the theaters would prevent people coming in once the movie has started. If they don't care enough about the film to get there on time, they shouldn't be allowed to disturb the rest of us who did.

 

[Jim DiJoseph]

I hate to be a wet blanket, but I had an experience that exceeds this one in impropriety (IMHO)...

My wife and I were at Disney, attending a matinee showing. The theater, which is on Disney grounds, was not even 10% full, so we had decent seats, right in the middle of the rows. We were also early, so we were able to select a row where we had the all-important "buffer seats" (empty seats) between us and other patrons. Anyway, after the previews started, a lone man came and sat right next to my wife - though there were many other empty seats in the row. I didn't really think much of it, instead assuming that he wanted to be in the middle of the row. So, the movie progressed (it sucked, the the way...The Avengers). At the end, about 15 minutes before the film completed, my wife leaned over and asked if she could sit on the other side of me. A little confused, I said, "Sure." She moved, and just after she sat down, the man got up and walked out. I looked at her and asked her what was wrong, and that's when I noticed she had tears in her eyes. She said that he was "touching" her. ('Course I found out later that she witheld telling me earlier on because she was afraid I'd flip out and get arrested or at least in trouble.) Well, she was right, of course. I ran out of the theater, caught up to the guy, and had a "discussion" with him. Half way through our "discussion", some Disney employees pulled me off the guy and called the police. Luckily, though, when the cops arrived, I was given a full pardon because the guy was a well known sex offender.

Funny, too, after the whole story was told, Disney was falling over themselves apologizing and giving us free stuff. Anyway...that's my "horrifying movie going experience."

 

[Hunter P]

Damn, I am surprised she put up with it for so long. WTG on the "discussion."


This doesn't just happen after the movie starts. It happens as much as 30 minutes before the movie starts. The problem doesn't lie with the people who arrive later than the majority. The problem lies with the early comers.

Movie audiences naturally leave an empty seat as a "personal space" buffer when they sit next to strangers. As the theater fills, we are left with a ton of empty singles scattered about the room.

Those people who arrive early to premieres and sold-out showings should realize that like it or not they are going to be sitting elbow to elbow with someone before the night is through and not leave buffers when they initially pick their seats.