Ok, first, they're not lying -- they're being tricky. The information you need is there; but it isn't obvious. It's not very nice, but it isn't quite dishonest. Like most things, if you're an informed consumer, you can figure out what you need to figure out. I'm not defending the practice, but I will say that they aren't flat out lying.
In answer to your question, no, they generally don't lie about what speakers can withstand, as long as you make sure you're comparing apples with apples, by which I mean RMS with RMS, peak with peak, and so on. A 100 watt RMS rating is not the same as a 100 watt peak rating... it's only the same as another 100 watt RMS rating.
But as almost always in audio, the answer really isn't that simple.
One thing that is no longer disclosed is how long a speaker can operate at its fully rated power. This is important because the voice coils in a standard technology speaker warm up quite fast when high power is applied to them, and while the speaker can generate the proper sound output while this is going on, you can still burn the insulation right off the voice coil and/or crossover inductors, melt the wires, and in general cause quite the mess once enough heat builds up.
Another thing is that the power rating of the amplifier is usually taken at 1 KHz; but the amplifier can probably generate that same amount of power at any frequency within its operating range. However, a speaker's power rating is for "general program material", which is a fancy way of saying that they expect lots of power in the bass, a moderate amount in the midrange, and not very much at all at high frequencies. So if you try to push 300 watts of reproduction into your speaker of nothing but a "sizzler" cymbal or a symphony triangle, for instance, you're going to burn out your tweeter and/or supertweeter... even if the speaker is rated for 300 watts. They mean 300 watts of mixed tones in the average way they are usually mixed. They
don't mean 300 watts in just one portion of the audio spectrum.
A stand-alone subwoofer is an exception to this, because it only takes in one portion of the spectrum, and so when they say 300 watts there, that's exactly what they mean, no fooling. I'd still be careful about long periods of applying full power. In most speaker designs, heat can't escape very quickly, and this causes it to build up right where you don't want it. It is quite common for powered subwoofer manufacturers to provide a heat sink for the subwoofer amplifier, but not for the sub's actual voice coil. To be fair, it's difficult to do. For what it's worth, a ported subwoofer generally withstands high temperatures better, because it gets to exchange a bit of the hot air inside for cooler outside air with every stroke of the driver; this helps remove heat from the voice coil, and so keeps things a bit cooler. Some designs use the speaker motion to pump air right past the voice coil, but there's a limit to that as well because it makes noise, and no one wants to hear the sub going "whoosh! whoosh!" Others move the heat into the metal framework that holds the speaker surface, which allows it to spread out more rather than concentrating in the voice coil, but eventually in a sealed box, even that can get too hot.
You also don't want to under-power a speaker system with multiple drivers and one or more crossovers -- you can kill it that way. The reason why is that an amplifier can produce output spikes that far exceed its rated power when it goes into distortion. These spikes are usually very fast, that is, they're equivalent to a high frequency pulse, so they get routed to the tweeter(s), which, as I described above, aren't generally capable of dealing with high power, because that's not normal for music, etc. So the tweeters get hit with these distorted pulses, and they burn out, usually very quickly. A clear indicator that you may be using an underpowered amplifier and driving it into distortion is finding your tweeters burned out. So you want an amplifier that can produce as much, or even more, than the speaker is rated for.
It is less common to see damage from an amp that momentarily puts, for instance, 110 watts of normal, undistorted program material into a 100 watt speaker, than it is from a 50 watt amp that, because it is driven into distortion, throws 50 watts or more directly into the tweeter as a supersonic noise pulse.
So with all that in mind, here's my take on amp power as it relates to speakers:
The best match in the power sense is an amplifier that can produce the speaker's rated power, or more, so it is never driven into distortion, matched with a conservative hand on the volume control so that the speaker voice coils are not overheated.
From there, we get into speaker questions of THD, efficiency, radiation angle, impedance, damping factor interaction (especially with tube amps), phase accuracy, maximum driver throw, driver stiffness, radiation angles, resonance, frequency response... oh, believe me, there's endless entertainment there for the audio obsessed like myself.
