Letterman takes PR hit to foil extortion attempt

Good for him.  I saw it.  The extortion was about things that have happened along the thirty year career.  I think anyone who thought that Dave had never had an affair with anyone on his staff for as long as he's hosted the show is an idiot.  And him coming out and saying it blunts all the negative drip-drip leak bullshit that can happen.  I hope the person who tried to extort him gets what they deserve.

I'm completely shocked by this.
Letterman has been an idol of sorts for me as I've enjoyed him and his show since the early 80's.
I love his sense of humor.
Now I'm not sure what to think about this news.

Ok nevermind then.





Edited by TonyD - 10/1/09 at 10:20pm

Sorry Tony :)  I didn't mean it quite that way.  Dave was a single man.  He wasn't attached for most of those years.  I just don't believe people would be shocked that he wasn't celibate for 30 years :)

But more then that, despite the news, people who practice extortion are committing a serious crime.  And unfortunately they prey on people being unwilling or afraid to admit their own personal mistakes.

 

Dave was willing to call their bluff and say "I did it" rather then hide behind smoke screens.  And his open and frank admission prevented leaks around the story that would have dribbled out for months.  It was open & honest candor from a celebrity about a difficult situation.  I don't know if I could expect more from anyone else.

I guess this is one thing that makes me feel like I should continue to admire him in spite of this mistake on his part.

Wow, sex in the workplace...

Let's string him up! And we better stop by Bob Barker's house, too!

Seriously, consenting adults doing something that is in no way illegal or harmful to anyone else is now a "mistake", eh?

Now, granted, if he was screwing around while he was married, that's one thing... but he's only been married for, what, 6 months?

Screwing around while in a relationship? Eh. not necessarily a "mistake". Hell, maybe his girlfriend knew and didn't care. Perhaps they had split. We don't know. Letterman has always been notoriously private about his... well, private life.

But I still don't see where any mistakes were made by Dave based on what we've learned so far (which is very little). Only mistakes that were made were by would-be extortionists... And people assuming the worst and extrapolating from one article, lite on facts, that all of this behavior happened recently instead over the course of Dave's late night career stretching all the way back to 1982 until... whenever.

I just saw the broadcast and I thought this was a joke, but it was real! I think he handled it very well. Just confront it and tell the world so the the gossip rags don't have anywhere to go.

I agree, it wasn't like he was sneaking around on his wife.

If there is an issue at all it's probably along the lines of "the boss banging the staff."  In most settings in the real world, this is something that could get you fired.

I have yet to see where the allegations are about something that happened 30 years ago - do you have a link?

We don't know that this happened 30 years ago.  All we know from what has come out is that it happened before his marriage.  So, we're talking some time ago.  And, the blackmailer apparently made all sorts of allegations.

 

I'm just saying:  Uh, OK. 

 

Hasn't Letterman been with his current wife for 23 years?  While I know he didn't marry her until fairly recently, when you're with someone that long, aren't you basically married?  Unless this all happened before 1990, Letterman is a scumbag.

 

No.  They have been "off and on" since 1990, and began dating in 1986 (she was a staffer)  Including several periods in which they were definitely separate.  We have no idea of how she would feel about this, and it's pretty likely she knew.. they became an exclusive couple and moved in in 1998, based on web-gossips, having his first kid in 2003.  They were not married until afterwards, and by even his accounts they did not maintain exclusivity before then.

 

I realize there will be people that were hurt.  But, it appears the whole thing boils down two two relationships outside of the woman he married - BEFORE- he married her.  Yes, they were staffers (and so was his wife).  Is it bad that he had relations with staff members?  Sure.  Is it the worst thing I've ever heard?  Not even close.

Letterman picked a good week to call out the extortionist though.. the news comparison of "Late Night host sleeps with two crew members before he was married" kind of pales in comparison to the other ongoing hollywood sex scandal of the last two weeks.  :)  

What I'm surprised no one is commenting on the sheer stupidity of the blackmailer who spelled out his demands a couple of times in front of Letterman and his lawyer!  Didn't it occur to him they'd head straight for the cops/DA?  Worse, the guy was a CBS "48 Hours" employee -- yeah that's the way to advance your career -- threaten your company's single most import star.

Letterman's humor certainly involve denigrating himself, so if anything this should give him plenty of material.

Yeah but people generally like Letterman. If this had hapened to Jay Leno, this thread would have people saying that NBC should cancel his show, that he should never be allowed on TV again and that he should wear a scarlet letter on his chest because he's an adulterer.

Leno has a 150+ love affairs going on with metal and gasoline. I don't think he has time to add in sleeping around. :) 

according to these:
http://gawker.com/5372983/who-is-david-lettermans-alleged-extortionist
http://defamer.gawker.com/5372885/gawker-exclusive-letterman-said-to-pay-assistants-law-school-bill

the blackmailer was a past producer who also had liaisons with staffers, and lived with Dave's most familiar daliance.

If Leno was being extorted, I'd be down for him calling them out too.  It took Bill Cosby forever to call out a girl who tried to extort him as a "fictional" daughter.  

Letterman will be fine.  I don't see anyone up in arms and going crazy over demands not to watch Grey's Anatomy because of the sex tape flying around.  No one protests Larry King who goes through women like water; even John Edwards can get away with knocking up a woman while his wife was suffering cancer.  The whole trick to it is coming out and admitting it and putting your spin on it first.  If you hide from it or you BS and deny and then have to reverse tracks.. then you're screwed.

I think I need some fallible heroes. With the possible exception of John Edwards, I don't care in the least who any of these peope sleep with. And even with Edwards, I care only because politics is such a game of hardly ever saying what you really think that we have to look for all kinds of other clues about the character of a candidate.

David Letterman? Seriously? The public is supposed to care who he sleeps with? Joan Rivers can be really irritating at times, but "Oh, grow up!" is a catchphrase that should remain when she goes.
 

I think it's sweet. And it reminds me of the amazing Tilda Swinton, who has both a husband her age and a lover many years her junior, and the three of them have a very nice arrangement.

I always find it funny that people are shocked when those in Hollywood have sex. 

Dave's in Hollywood?

 

Or Will & Jada Smith's frankness about their open marriage.

People keep posting these terrible things like "Dave's wife will leave him, how terrible, blah blah blah"  She WAS a staffer.  What happens in their private life is their business.

The person in question is apparently Stephanie Berkitt, video'd here



She has granted an interview, which is expected tomorrow, where she apparently implies she was unaware of the extortion, which was caused by her leaving her new boyfriend (the guy on 48 Hours) and not for Dave, etc  She claims she is "mortified" to be involved in this, and that there was nothing seedy or "off".  

The extortionist looks like they will go down for some time.

I'd like one reputable source that Will or Jada Smith have an open marriage.

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/872401/will_smith_says_open_marriage_is_the.html
http://www.imnotobsessed.com/2009/03/27/jada-pinkett-smith-addresses-open-marriage-rumor
http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/11/will-smith-admits-to-open-marriage-or-did-he/
http://stupidcelebrities.net/2008/07/10/will-smith-open-marriage-with-jada-pinkett-smith/

As near as I can tell, they're simply saying if they feel they need to do something outside of the marriage, they'd talk to each other about it first. That's just about the ultimate level of respect as far as I'm concerned (the ultimate would be not needing to have that conversation). The vast majority of people who cheat have "open" marriages without talking to their partner about it. And for that matter, when people talk about open marriages, they're usually referring to Swingers or situations where having sex outside the marriage is a common occurrence, which doesn't seem to apply to the Smiths at all.
 

Well call me Mr. Conservative if you must, but I guess I don't see what the point of marrying someone is if you are just going to screw other people.

I guess some people think there's more to a marriage than sex?

I bet if you were to ask people if they would rather ;
A) have their partner fall in love with someone else but not act on it , or
B) Have a meaningless night of wild sex with another person...

Most people would probably choose A. I think that's pretty sad myself.

I don't watch Letterman that much. Never really have. I do admire him taking the bull by the horns and letting his viewers know what is up. If he didn't he would have been dragged through the tabloids saying that he is some kind of scum big shot that used his position to take advantage of a poor staffer.

Dave just put an end to all the bullshit made up stuff by reporters and told what is going on. End of story.

Why bother calling you conservative when there's no evidence people calling themselves conservative are any more faithful than anyone else. Religious liberals don't feel cheating is any more acceptable than religious conservatives. But it happens. If it were a disease, it'd be classified an epidemic. Right up there with divorce, which also happens rampantly.
 
And again, I see nothing in anything WIll or Jada Smith said that leads me to believe they went into their marriage intending to be with other people sexually. What they've simply done is acknowledge the reality of the situation, which makes them intelligent in my book. Do you respect more the people who somehow think that the reasons other people ending up cheating, despite the fact that at one point they never thought they would, don't apply to them. Do you somehow respect more the people who deny the reality and go ahead and cheat? Because that's what a vast number of people in this pristine "closed" marriages end up doing.

I think the fact that they'd come and talk to each other about the desire to step outside of the marriage is probably the number one reason why neither of them would. Because it'd be tough for boredom, outside attraction, and variety to hold a candle to the person sitting in front of you that you could seriously talk to about such things.

The bottom line is, until I see evidence to the contrary, if someone insists on saying Will and Jada are in an open marriage, I take that as a reflection on the person casting unsupportable aspersions, not Will and Jada.

I'm just saying that if you intend to engage in a sexual relationship with someone other than your partner, perhaps marriage is not the best road for you (Hard to tell if your response was facetious or not). I guess I was just raised to believe that one of the cornerstones of a marital commitment was sexual fidelity. Of course, Letterman was not married for all those years. As for the choice you present, thinking about it, it's not as much of an easy choice as it appears to be. On the A side, it would be a difficult thing to deal with, but the partner does stay faithful, or B it may be meaningless, but still a complete betrayal and a shattering of trust (and especially bad if "Wild" means all the things that you have to pull teeth to get from your partner)


Probably was the best course of action to nip it in the bud. Still as one poster suggested, if you're the boss at any "regular" company and it's revealed you are having sex with your underlings, you would likely get fired. In fact, may companies have very specific rules forbidding romantic relationships among fellow employees.


This is true, cheating does happen rampantly and so does divorce. But why? In a way, your post sheds light as to possible reasons. You say that Will and Jada Smith "acknowledge the reality of the situation" What reality, that man is not meant to be monogamous? And all I'm saying is that is someone's attitude, why go through with entering a marriage? I think many people get divorced and cheat because they may not realize the magnitude of the commitment that is involved in marriage. It takes a lot of work and a lot of will power to keep a marriage healthy. You have to love someone to the point where the last thing you would do is cheat on them. And sometimes those feelings don't withstand the course of time where sadly, at that point, a couple will have to evaluate whether or not it still makes sense to be together.

I don't claim to be an expert, but I get the feeling that the "open marriage" rarely ultimately works out. Because, like I said, if you feel the need to be with others sexually, then you probably should not be married.
Edited by WillG - 10/3/09 at 8:20pm

Wow.  I really didn't mean to cast aspersions or anything of the sort.. in fact, as I said, I didn't necessarily view it as a bad thing.

I guess it's how you hear it.

http://womansday.ninemsn.com.au/celebrity/celebgossip/590435/will-smiths-open-relationship

I will admit, and I'm sure I will be branded a scumbag here, but my wife & I have had an open marriage for more then 15 years.  We aren't getting divorced, it rarely comes into play, but you know what, we're in a happy and stable relationship and I have never once in my life worried about that changing.  While we watched friends and those who were in college with us get married/divorced/married/divorced, we've built a pretty nice & happy home, and I love her as much now as I did when I met her nearly 2 decades ago.

So, I guess I didn't see it as an aspersion.  I think far more people then you know have a fairly open and honest relationship then people care to admit.  Let me also explain something: your understanding of an open marriage is the kind of bogeyman approach people put on it.  That all people in open marriages are swingers or who act privately and in secret.  Wrong.  Most people who have an open relationship have an open relationship because we believe heavily that LYING to each other is the ultimate sin.  We aren't the people who go seeking weird thrills or find themselves part of goofball scenes.  That's something else.  It's that you believe if something may happen, you openly and honestly discuss it, you lay all the cards on the table beforehand, and everyone is aware.  That is a level of safety & security to it.  Cheating risks getting caught.  If the other partner knows, you don't worry about it.   So, when they say they have respect enough in each other to talk about.. that's exactly what they mean.  That is what it is.  It is not going out on a weekly, nightly, frequent basis and fooling around.  That doesn't happen.  If that happens, you probaby don't have a relationship, or you have something very different.

Right now in America 50% of marriages fail.  A huge number of kids are born to single mothers.  And a big part of it is dishonesty, cheating, etc.  We knew before we got married what we wanted, and for both of us, it has been pretty much what we thought.  Now, I realize every situation is different.  And we are not some deeply religious folk (admittedly, we are both atheist/agnostic), and we are not slack-jawed yokels (medical degree/engineering), but it's what worked out.  I won't go into politics (conserv) but that's beside the point.

The issue I have is that many people view relationships very different then others.  And all anyone can do is judge by the standard that works for one person or couple.  We all fall into our own roles and what works for us.  For Dave's situation, he wasn't married at the time this happened.  The one girl who is known to be involved said she was not in any way pressured (to TMZ) and that she and Dave parted amicably and had a good relationship before and after as adults.

What Dave did well is what Patrick pointed out.. he told the truth.  He didn't hide behind lawyers or a smoke screen.  He got up and said: I had a relationship.  Which we now know the last one referenced in the case was apparently five years ago, which is about 5 years before he got married (this spring).  Even for those that assume he should be fully monogamous - which is fine, and a societally accepted ideal, it doesn't mean that anything he did years before he was married even comes into the picture.  If we held people to that standard, look out.  You wouldn't watch half of the TV shows on the air.  No one would watch Heroes because damn that sex tape, and a busted marriage in the bunch.  No one would tolerate Larry King.. that guy, how many marriages under his belt?

 

Please.  We have network reality programming where Brooke Hogan tries to figure out guys and Kim Kardashin publishes a sex tape and they all still get shows.  
 

Dave was an adult with consenting adults and wasn't married at the time.  The one woman who has come forward says she is emberrassed this was revealed and that's it.  So, hwo can I hold it against Dave?  I can hold it against CBS though.. how can they have a segment producer type at "48 Hours" a news program try to commit blackmail and their dumb asses can't figure out they have a crime happening on an investigative journalism set..

(wow, I realize now all my commentary on "Big Love" will be looked at a completely different way now)  :)

Gotcha. My statement was in relationship to the prevailing attitude in society. If a gay person says, "A lot of people are gay, look at Will Smith," it may not be considered an aspersion to the gay person saying it, but it's wrong to cavalierly paint someone as other than they are. If tomorrow, TMZ had an headline "Will Smith is gay!" do you think they'd have that headline because people would see it in a positive light? Likewise, when the open marriage headlines hit the ether, they're not doing it in the tone of "Will Smith donates to local food pantry." There is no quote in the link you provided that says the Smiths are in an open marriage. It's headline wording by people with an agenda.


Not by me. For one thing, that's my whole point -- I'm not into the branding thing. For another thing, I know people in various walks of life (Wiccans, swingers, whatever) who are people I generally respect who do have sex outside of their marriages. I'm not here to tell someone else why they should and shouldn't get married.



I doubt it. FIrst, I'm too old to believe in the bogeyman. ;) But second, as I've said, I know too many people in too many various walks of life that are actually in some form of open marriage. But lastly, I would never lump it into the so-called bogeyman pile because I simply don't care how people chose to live as long as it doesn't unfairly adversely affect my life.



Actually, I said that. So you see, I get it. ;)

I've no intent to hijack a David Letterman thread (there's enough to talk about there), but that's how rumors get started (or fed). Someone makes an offhand comment with no proof, nobody points that out, and it takes on a life of its own.
 
I'm still waiting for the first person to come on record and say he'll no longer watch Letterman because of this stuff. I'll read intently about the reason why.