*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

Good God, it was such a hunk of junk.

I was a the midnight show, DYING to see my favorite horror icon resurrected for a whole new franchise.

But holy Christ, this was one awful movie.

First off, it's directed without a sense of style by Marcus Nipsel. Very few moments have any tension and even less offer up any suspense.

And then there's the fact that this doesn't look OR feel like Friday the 13th. Predictably, it looks and feels EXACTLY like Platinum Dunes' Chainsaw remake. Since when is Crystal Lake such a white trash community loaded to the brim with scuzzy hillbillies and sinister- looking locals?

There's the score. It seemingly goes out of its way to NOT use Manfredini's subtle cues. In fact, I think I only heard the familiar chords once or twice. The rest of the music was forgettable and of the direct to DVD quality.

But the worst thing about Friday '09 is that it shows that its filmmakers (all of them) never got what it was all about anyway. In the past, F13's victims might of smoked dope and had sex, but they weren't a collection of sociopaths and retards who couldn't muster up one likable moment in their pathetic lives. Not for one second were any of these people real. They're caricatures, and probably the most deplorable lot of them ever.

Then there's Jason. At least, the crazed killer that the filmmakers kept telling me was Jason. But I refuse to accept this into the canon on the grounds that you could swap the film's killer with Leatherface '03 and you wouldn't miss a beat. All Platinum Dunes have done is taken away the chainsaw this time around. I wasn't against the fact that the filmmakers tried to give Jason some more 'character', but these added 'dimensions' didn't do anything for the character. In fact, everything about F13 '09 is SO ineptly staged that you barely feel the presence of this character. It's that lazy.

Platinum Dunes have certainly figured out how to make the same shit film over and over again, changing only a few bells and whistles. Hell, even the characters have the same fucking motivations. In TCM '03, our 'normal characters' were smuggling pot back from Mexico. This time, some of our unlikable campers are looking to loot a fabled 'pot crop'. As if pot and fucking are they only two things that can possibly be featured in a F13 movie. Sure kids smoke it, but it doesn't drive every fiber of their being.

Ultimately, F13 '09 can be summed up in its most embarrassing scene: where Jason acquires his hockey mask. Not only are we treated to the comedic wonder of one of the most obnoxious characters in recent horror films - the hillbilly pot farmer who fondly reminisces about losing his virginity to a mannequin - but the clumsy manner in which the mask is acquired couldn't have felt more lazy or forced. And that's the whole movie, stupid and clumsy.

The first 6 Fridays are among my favorite movies of all time. I have seen them dozens upon dozens of times. And there's nothing here that recalls the magic of those installments. It's just shit from a group of filmmakers who never fully understood their source material in the first place. And the result is one of the worst horror films in some time.

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

Have to agree with mattfini on this one,Especially the comments about leatherface,i just got back from seeing the film with my cousin and tye 1st thing I said to him after seeing it was how much it wouldnt have mattered if you just threw letherface in there instead of jason.I was actually disappointed in the movie.I wonder if the other version promised on the upcoming dvd/bluray will change my opinion of the movie.We shall have to see!

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

I thought it was pretty good. It was easily the most technically accomplished F13 ever made and, while it's way too early to rank it, I'll say that only The Final Chapter, Jason Lives, Part 2 and the original rate higher.

I thought Derek Mears' Jason was a badass in this one. He demonstrated some intelligence and was more cunning and was able to lure people into traps rather than just lumbering around. He's not Kane Hodder but I think he leaves every other Jason in the dust.

I knew there'd be changes from the original but they didn't bother me. I've seen those other movies so I didn't see a need to reshoot them. That being said, I had no doubt that most hardcore fans will be up in arms over this movie... just like they were over Jason Goes To Hell, Jason X and Freddy Vs. Jason and like they will be when a sequel to this comes out in a year or two.

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

I just saw it and I have mixed feelings at this point and am still gathering my thoughts on it. It's like I don't even know what to say.

In my case, being a diehard fan who's dutifully seen every film in the theater since Part 2 in 1981, this was not exactly a new experience for me on the big screen. Not that I was expecting or really wanting anything too different -- after all, don't diehard fans want a lot of the same general M.O. from this series...? Jason kills a bunch of stupid teenagers in all sorts of different ways... that's what we want. And yet, somehow it wasn't enough for me this time out. Maybe it's because I'll turn 47 this year and I've been here and done that 11 other times. Maybe because, even though there is the carnage on display here, it still doesn't feel like a FRIDAY THE 13TH film to me and doesn't have the heart (kind of like the newer Godzilla movies are more slick yet miss the mark).

I didn't hate the new F13 ... it was actually pretty good in some ways... Jason was pretty intense and powerful, very deadly... that's the best thing about it, I'd say. He's never seemed more unbeatable and some of the kills were good, but unlike Michael Elliott I WAS fully expecting one of them:

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)

I didn't really like any of the young characters, with the exception of the guy who was searching for his missing sister.

So what's with this modern-day tendency to have films in brownish or grimey hues instead of nice color? And I have to say that it was awful dark at times, I mean to the point where I couldn't clearly decipher what chaos was happening unless I tried real hard. And yep, we have to deal with some pretty flashy MTV-type trickery in the cutting now and then.

I could have done without the rock music, and the soundtrack itself was not much to write home about.

I didn't care for the opening 2 minutes where we rapidly go through the ending of the 1980 film, with a really unsatisfying version of Mrs. Voorhees. And after that it's just a quick run-through of Part 2 (Jason in his hood) and a nod to Part 3 (Jason gets his trademark hockey mask, though in a pretty convenient way).

I don't know. It's got a really brutal and merciless Jason slaughtering those teens, which is the best thing I can say ... yet as generic and routine as these cliches were in the old films, something of a spark was there and I can't quite place what's lacking this time. It's almost as if Jason isn't Jason this time, too ... but another maniac in a mask going crazy.

I didn't see the TEXAS CHAINSAW remake, and I won't; the original is just too true a classic to bother. But the 2009 FRIDAY THE 13th, while delivering the goods in the "killing" department, just isn't as much fun as it could have been. I'd probably place this one in the middle somewhere, but at least ahead of JASON GOES TO HELL and JASON X. For me, the best two Jason films are still JASON LIVES and THE FINAL CHAPTER... I'd say FRIDAY 09 can take a place somewhere along with #'s 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, and FVJ for me.

For NOW, that is ...

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

In essence, this is Friday The 13th Part 2, since it's quite clear that the first film is in continuity with this one...and I got to say, I quite liked that. It doesn't throw away the original but it resets the character of Jason...back to the essence. I dug that.

Not being the biggest Jason fan (Freddy on the other hand...), I enjoyed the hell out of this film. I'm easily anticipating the DVD release with the extra ten minutes to see what was actually cut.

The kills were nice, only a few that were memorable. The kids actually were okay. I felt bad for a few of them. Only the Trent character ( who, if you remember is the actor who played "Trent" in Transformers which puts this film in the same universe as that film) was the most annoying who really needed to die. But, he is involved in the best scene in the film, has the best moment in the film, and has one of the most impressive kills as well.

Another interesting aspect was the character of Jason himself. He's definitely re imagined in a way. He's a hunter, almost a survivalist in this film. You can definitely feel the intelligence and cunning with this version of Jason. It's a welcomed addition.

I enjoyed The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, despised the Halloween remake, and didn't really see the others that have come out recently. This film is the best of the remakes.

*** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

As one might guess, I'm a huge horror movie fan. During my formative years as a wee lad, my mother (bless her soul) would suffer through all manner of drive in movie schlock with me. Classics like Death Ship, Krull, The Nude Bomb, Jaws 3D, The Keep, Phantasam, Conan the Barbarian, CHUD, Chinese Hercules - all manner of pleasures were on display after dark, thanks to her. And while I love all those films, of all the schlock I have seen over the years, the one that made the biggest impression on me has to have been the Friday the 13th series. While Halloween is the superior horror flick, when you need an unending stream of ichor, nothing scratches that itch like good ol' Jason Vorhees.

The Friday the 13th series have often been a mixed bag in the past - occasionally made of pure win (parts 4 and 6), sometimes dreadful and boring (parts 5 and most of 8), but the remake manages to deliver the type of movie that fans are craving. In fact, it's really hard to fuck up a Jason flick, if you follow a couple of simple rules:

Creative kills and lots of them? Check.

Large amounts of drugs and alcohol? Check

Completely Gratuitous Sex? Check. In fact this may be the first Friday the 13th with more skin than gore - not that there's a lack of blood or anything, just that director Marcus Nispel (previously of the reasonably decent Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake a couple years back) would much rather linger on naked tits than a dead body.

The highpoint of the film - we're back to Jason as the angel of death who reaps anyone impure with deadly accuracy and unstoppable fury instead of the depressingly emo Jason (played by Ken Kirzinger) who threw down with Freddy Krueger a couple of years ago. Also, we're back to a more craftier, more human Jason of the early movies, not Zombie Jason of the later series. A smart move, since it grounds the film more in reality (well, as grounded in reality as these movies can get) and makes it a whole lot scarier.

So, what about the plot, the acting, and the story? Pfft - who cares about that! The cast of characters are largely forgettable archetypes that only exist to drink beer, fuck , and smoke weed before being slaughtered. Meanwhile the plot is the barest framework of events with just enough narrative drive to get us from point A to point B. No, let us focus on the real reason we are here: the kills! And they are glorious! The murders tend to range from great to DAAAAAMMMN!!! This is a mean, lean streamlined Jason, using every object in arms reach to slay his victims quickly and efficiently. The murders satisfy but nothing really all time iconic like the 'Jason splitting the hand-stand guy in half' bit in part 3 (although the sleeping bag in the fire comes damn close). And there were a lot of red herrings scattered about. "Oh, he's gonna get killed with circular saw" when it was really the screwdriver through the neck, or things like the arrow through the head that comes out of nowhere. Very well done.

Oh, and a bit ago where I said I didn’t care about the production values? That's not quite true. The film looks low budget - and I don’t mean that in a bad way. It looks very eighties, with lots of film grain and low lights, looking like it was shot on 16mm film stock instead of slick digital Aughts production methods. It adds a certain level of authenticity to the proceeding that you just don’t get in modern horror films.

So How's Jason? I'm going to be bold and say that Derek Mears does the best Jason since fan-favorite Kane Hodder, and almost edges him out for the crown. He does a lot with body language - there's a lot of physical power behind the mask, but he has a subtlety to his smaller movements. Gone is the unstoppable force of nature, replaced with someone unstoppable, but intelligent, crafty and cunning. Very well played, sir.

So is the Friday the 13th remake a good movie? Not by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, I imagine it will get ripped to shreds by mainstream press, as the series has always done. But as a long time fan of the series, I was pleased at the treatment of the franchise by the production team, and would rank this up with The Final Chapter and Jason Lives as some of the best the franchise has to offer. And of course, it's wide open for another installment. I only hope that when that day comes, they call it Friday the 13th: Part 13. I've been waiting my whole life for that!

Re: *** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

It was decent enough I thought.

This film is certaintly more polished than the others which both makes it nice to look at while at the same time leaves me nostalgic for the original which looked very bright and natural.

As others have noted this is actually a remake of parts 2 and 3 with the conclusion of the original thrown in very quickly before the oening credits roll.

That's an efficiant way to do things, if they continue to condense two or three films into one we'll have every 'Friday' film represented by the third new film lol.

It was what I went for, bloody, loud and with one angry (and smart!) Jason.

Re: *** Official FRIDAY THE 13TH (2009) Review Thread

Hey, if you can't enjoy the sight of topless water-skiiing, then I fear this isn't the movie for you. Talk about an unexpected turn for this updating of the F13 franchise. I usually watch these types of films in the movie theaters for the audience reactions moreso than mine, it's just funny to hear people squeal, gasp, get grossed out by the various ways to kill a human being in films of this genre. This film delivered on the killings, even made me sympathetic towards some of the characters, rooting for them to make it through the ordeal alive. There are some purely idiotic actions undertaken, but it goes with the territory.

"Nice nipple placement." now goes into my book of movie quotes.

I give it 2.5 stars, or a grade of C+.