Track the Films You Watch (2009) - Page 38

The final films in my Bette Davis marathon this month. 


Anniversary, The (1968)
 

Roy Ward Baker
 

Bette Davis made her second and final appearance in a Hammer film with this dark comedy that certainly gives the actress a memorable role.  In the film she plays a mother from hell who invites her sons and their families back to her mansion to celebrate her wedding anniversary.  Once the sons get there, mommy goes to work by ruining their relationships with their women and really sets her eyes on her youngest son's fiance (Elaine Taylor).  This black comedy has a lot going for it except the laughs.  I really found most of the humor to be too dry to really work and in the end I can't help but be disappointed in this film even though we get Davis eating as much scenery as anytime in her career.  Whether she's wearing her red or black eye-patch, she gives it her all in creating a woman you can't help but hate not only because of how mean she is but because of how cocky, arrogant and just downright vicious she is.  Davis chews up one scene after another and really controls and punishes the rest of the actors in her way.  The only one of the supporting cast that really stands a chance is Taylor who is quite easy on the eyes and comes off pretty good.  Her character is the one who fights back at Davis and the young actress makes you believe her toughness.  The screenplay is fairly straight in terms of it trying to get humor.  There's really no slapstick or any physical laughs but instead it's mostly dialogue driven.  The dialogue itself isn't the greatest and a lot of it focuses on meanness rather than anything else.  One of the sons enjoys dressing in women's clothing, which is another easy gag that never really provides any laughs. 
 

Now, Voyager (1942)
 

Irving Rapper
 

Bette Davis plays an ugly duckling who suffers a nervous breakdown due to the overbearing torment from her mother (Gladys Cooper).  A doctor (Claude Rains) is able to cure the young woman who goes on to find romance with an unhappy married man (Paul Henreid) but this relationship threatens to hurt the woman's mental state.  This classic drama from Warner certainly deserves its reputation as one of the best soap operas out there and most of this is due to the tremendous cast who do a terrific job in the acting department.  The Oscar winning score, great cinematography and some memorable locations just add to the pleasure.  There's no question that this film belongs to Davis and she marvelously transforms from the ugly duckling to the princess.  This film takes its time in the transformation, which is a good thing because it's an ongoing situations from start to finish.  Davis really digs deep and delivers an incredibly strong character and it's a real treat seeing her transform from the early parts of the film to the end.  The way Davis makes the early version look so ugly is quite remarkable as is the strong-headed nature to the second half character.  The film also gets a lot out of the supporting characters with Henreid also delivering a very troubled character but one different than that of Davis.  Rains is pitch-perfect in his small role as is Cooper who has to be considered one of the best villains in film history.  The coldness she brings this mother character certainly makes ones blood boil.  Bonita Granville, from the studios Nancy Drew series, also has a small role here.  I think the film's main problem is how predictable it is in terms of a twist that comes at the end.  Outside of this and a few dragging spots, this is a classic film that is a must see due to the terrific cast.

Private Lessons (1981)
 

Alan Myerson
 

The 15-year-old Phillip (Eric Brown) is starting to understand the bodies of women but he gets some "private lessons" from his maid (Sylvia Kristel).  What he doesn't know is that the chauffeur (Howard Hesseman) is using her to blackmail the rich kid's father.  If the visuals of an older woman having sex with a 15-year-old kid bothers you then it would be best to stay away from this film, which is without question one of the more "out there" entries in the long-running list of teen/sex comedies from the decade.  I'm really not sure why anyone would take this too offensive, although I'm sure all hell would break loose if the roles were reversed and you had an older man giving private lessons to a teen girl.  The film, for the most part, never takes itself too serious and instead comes off as a typical fantasy as the horny boy grows closer and closer the perfect woman.  The film manages to be quite charming up until the final act, which nearly kills the things.  I'm really not sure why they needed the subplot of the blackmail because it's not funny and really adds nothing to the film.  The relationship between the boy and maid takes up the first hour and it actually turns into something nice but then it all gets thrown away with the blackmail.  The best moments of the film happen after the boy fails to get some because he's too scared and then has to take some jokes by his friend.  Brown does a pretty good job in the role of the kid and makes for a nice lead.  Hesseman is good as the scumbag driver but it's Kristel's body that steals the film.  She'll never be accused of being a good actress but she knows how to be sexual and that's all that is needed here.  The soundtrack is also a great one as we get John Mellencamp's 'I Need a Lover', Earth Wind & Fire's 'Fantasy', Eric Clapton's 'Next Time You See Here' plus Rod Stewart's 'Hot Legs', 'Tonight's the Night' and 'You're in My Heart'.  Fans of this genre will certainly find enough nudity, cheap laughs and more nudity to keep them entertained.
 

Green Room, The (1978)
 

Francois Truffaut
 

Truffaut plays a journalist still grieving the death of his wife nearly ten years after her passing.  Her passing helped his obsession of death, which ends up making him a friend in an equally strange woman (Nathalie Baye) who also has her own interesting thoughts on the subject.  As his obsession grows deeper, the man decides to buy a chapel and turn it into a sanctuary for his wife and other dead friends.  This is an extremely bizarre film from Truffaut and while I'm still new to his work, this here is certainly the least entertaining of his films that I've seen.  I think the entire film is just one real big mess that never really makes sense of what it's trying to do.  I couldn't help but feel a tad bit lost as the movie never really seems clear as to what it's trying to say about death as both characters are pulling in opposite directions.  I found their relationship to be extremely forced and completely make belief as not for a single second did I feel either one could care for the other.  Another minor issue was the performance by Baye, which I thought was rather weak.  The problem with this is that Truffaut was pretty good and the two just don't work very well together and in the end it hurts the film because not only does their relationship feel weak but it doesn't help that the actor is so many better than the partner.  I'd be lying if I said I hated this movie because I really didn't.  There just wasn't anything here that kept me overly entertained and in the end I was just too bored by the characters and screenplay.

Mortuary (2005)
 

Tobe Hooper
 

Being a teen is hard but it's even harder when your mom is a mortician and moves you into a creepy house with a cemetery attached to it.  That's what happens to Jonathan (Dan Byrd) who learns that the house is apparently not only haunted but stalked by a deformed maniac.  I think it's fair to say Hooper has been a disappointment ever since his debut even though every fan keeps hoping his next film will be one worth writing home about.  This one here, like so many in his career, isn't a terrible movie but at the same times there's really nothing special in it.  This film mixes THE SHINING, NIGHT OF THE CREEPS and a little bit of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD but it can't hold a candle to any of those films and in the end you can't help but feel you've wasted your time.  Right from the start you can't help but think the mother is stupid for keeping her children there but the reasons behind the "hauntings" is quite silly and doesn't work by the time they pop up at the end.  The movie is never scary which doesn't help matters when it doesn't have much gore either.  The special effects are poor CGI that look so obviously fake so here's yet another negative.  The cast aren't too bad as they deliver the type of performances you'd expect to find in this type of film.  Hooper manages to keep the film moving at a nice pace but the screenplay really doesn't give him too much to work with. 

Savage Streets (1984)
 

Danny Steinmann
 

Linda Blair continued her road down exploitation street with this cheap knock off of DEATH WISH.  In the film she plays a punk teenager who seeks vengeance on four thugs who gang rape her sister (Linnea Quigley) and kill her best friend.  I think it goes without saying that this film was probably rushed into production after DEATH WISH II proved to be a big box office draw so they get the former Oscar winner to put on a black leather outfit and stalk the streets of L.A. looking for the punks.  Director Steinmann is best known and probably most hated for his work on FRIDAY THE 13TH V: A NEW BEGINNING and I can't say this film is any better.  I'm a fan of that entry in the series because it's rather fresh and sleazy but none of that can be seen here.  Instead we have one drawn out sequence after another and this film drags at every moment.  The only saving graces are the mandatory shower sequence and Blair's nude scene, which I'm sure got a few headlines back in the day.  The biggest problem is that there aren't any sympathetic characters.  No matter how trashy or pathetic the DEATH WISH sequels got, we at least cared for Bronson and his character but Blair's character here is just as filthy as anyone else so it's hard for us to feel anything for her.  Why they made her such a bad character is beyond me but the twist in the story doesn't work.  It also doesn't help matters that part of the film seems like a spoof while the other half tries to be so serious.  Nothing ever makes a bit a sense including the scene where the friend is killed in broad daylight with cars passing by.  Blair sleepwalks through the role and delivers a rather bland performance.  Quigley isn't given anything to do and we also have John Vernon cashing a paycheck and saying lines like "Go f**k an iceberg".  Blair's trip down the exploitation market delivered this as well as CAGED HEAT and fans might get a kick out of her nudity in the two flicks but that's about all either one has to offer.
 

I did a lot better than I expected this month with the Davis titles as I was able to watch all of the ones I had recorded from TCM over the year as well as a few others that I had been meaning to see for years.  Of all the films, it was actually Gish in THE WHALES OF AUGUST that really took my breathe away.  So much so that I finally read her bio "The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me".  I had read bits and pieces over the past few months but I finally had time at work (of all places) to read it all.  Of the 350 pages, I think around 275 were about Griffith.  I loved reading the thing but it really wasn't too much about Gish as she spent more time on Griffith.  Even his films that she wasn't in got more attention than some of her classics like THE NIGHT OF THE HUNTER, which got a total of one small paragraph.  I've read several books about Griffith and reading the opinions of someone who was actually there was a lot more interesting than reading the opinions of someone who was born a decade after Griffith had died. 

Anyhow, the Davis features and docs:

Wicked Stepmother (1989)
Bunny O'Hara (1971)
In This Our Life (1942)

Letter, The (1940)
Fashions of 1934 (1934) 
Pocketful of Miracles (1961)

Hell's House (1932)

Man Who Came to Dinner, The (1942)
Dark Victory (1939)

Old Maid, The (1939)
Deception (1946)

Watcher in the Woods, The (1980)

Watch on the Rhine (1943)
Whales of August, The (1989)
Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)
Anniversary, The (1968)
Now, Voyager (1942)
 

Bette Davis: A Basically Benevolent Volcano (1983)
Hollywood My Home Town (1965) 
Stardust: The Bette Davis Story (2006)

Quote:

Originally Posted by PatW 

Michael, glad to see all those great Bette Davis classics. One I recommend is Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte if you haven't seen it. I liked it even better than Whatever Happened to Betty Jane.

Thanks for the recommendation.  I have HUSH HUSH sitting here so I'm going to try and get it on at some point next year.  I'm not sure if I'm going to continue doing these "Director/Star" months but I've got another Davis marathon planned with that title included. 


Joe, as you know, one of my goals is to watch any film you give a BOMB rating to so I've added THE MUMMY to my queue.  What you described appears to be what the film was going for.  The old fashioned, boring and rather bland versions from Universal and Hammer would put just about anyone to sleep so I'm hoping the 1999 version at least can keep things moving.  Perhaps I can watch it during the Horror Challenge as a double feature with VAN HELSING.


Three Wise Girls (1932)
 

William Beaudine

Jean Harlow plays the good girl who moves from a small town to New York City to make some big cash to help give her mom a better life.  Once in the big city she quits three jobs because the bosses keep wanting more than just work.  She meets an old friend (Mae Clarke) and is disgusted to learn that she is dated a married man.  Soon Harlow meets a man (Walter Byron) of her own but after falling in love she finds out that he too is married.  This is a rather strange Pre-Code from Columbia that pretty much tries to explain why it's okay to date married men.  This topic certainly wouldn't be made into movies within the next couple years as the Hayes Office would put their foot down on any type of subject like this one.  What makes the film work are the performances, which are pretty good with Harlow stealing the film as the naive blonde who doesn't really know what all life has to offer.  Harlow is quite believable as the innocent, sweet girl and it shows she could play more than just vamps.  Byron is also quite good as the poor sap stuck in a worthless marriage.  He brings quite a bit of charm to the role and makes for a very like able character.  Clarke is decent but pretty much wasted in the supporting role as is Marie Prevost as the "third" girl.  Andy Devine is also wasted in a small supporting role, although he manages to get a couple nice laughs.  The sexual innuendo is certainly on display her certainly early on as Harlow is undressing and constantly bending down with a rather loose top on.  The film is certainly very predictable but director One Shot keeps things moving at a nice pace.  The ending is one you'll see from a mile away but it's handled very well.
 

Final Edition, The (1932)
 

Howard Higgin
 

"B" movie is in the same mode as THE FRONT PAGE.  This time out Mae Clarke plays a reporter who is fired by her editor (Pat O'Brien) after she turns down his proposal.  After the police commissioner is killed by some gangster, Clarke tries to prove her worth as a reporter by going undercover and trying to bring down the killers.  This thing doesn't have the greatest screenplay in the world as there are several plot holes but that doesn't take away from the entertainment value.  The 66-minute fly by thanks in large part to the nice work by Clarke and O'Brien.  Clarke has no troubles fitting the role of the tough woman as she has the perfect voice to come off tough and she's also sassy enough to be very charming.  O'Brien talks as fast as he can get the words out and also adds plenty of charm making his character, while unoriginal, at least entertaining.  The two together make for some real fireworks and one can't help but smile when they two are on screen.  Morgan Wallace gets the play the tough guy with Bradley Page and Mary Doran also doing fine work as the rats.  I doubt many people outside of fans of the cast are going to bother watching this film when they could always just watch THE FRONT PAGE or HIS GIRL FRIDAY but fans of "B" movies will certainly want to check this one out.  There's nothing great about it and it's certainly not a classic but it does have enough charm to make it work your hour.
 

Richest Girl in the World, The (1934)
 

William A. Seiter
 

Miriam Hopkins plays Dorothy Hunter, the richest girl in the world who also happens to be a recluse.  Mrs. Hunter always sends her secretary (Fay Wray) out to pretend to be here.  One day at a party Hunter, pretending to be the secretary, meets a man (Joel McCrea) who claims that he could fall in love with a rich woman even if she didn't have money.  This RKO comedy was certainly inspired by Barbara Hutton, who at the time really was the richest girl in the world.  The built up love story was probably the creation of someone in the RKO front office but the end results are fairly disappointing considering the cast involved.  The story itself is the biggest problem as is goes from A to B to C without anything new being done and by the time the film is over you can't help but feel as if you've witness nothing but one cliche after another.  The highlight of the film would be a scene where McCrea and Wray are out in a canoe when a jealous Hopkins comes up in a large part to tip them over.  This sequence was a very funny one but there aren't too many laughs after it.  McCrea and Hopkins made enough films together to be charming and they do that here.  The two of them bring their characters to life even though the screenplay doesn't offer them much.  Wray is also pretty good in her role but again, the screenplay doesn't give you anything.  In the end this is a completely forgettable movie that most people will overlook so unless you're a fan of the stars then it's best to just keep this one in the vault.
 

Barbary Coast (1935)
 

Howard Hawks
 

Masterful acting highlight this overlooked gem that features just about everything you'd want out of a classic from the Golden Era of movies.  Miriam Hopkins plays a poor girl from New York who travels to San Francisco to marry a man she's never met but once she arrives she learns that he has been murdered.  Since she didn't love him, she decides to team up with the man responsible for his death, a ruthless casino owner (Edward G. Robinson) who wants to keep the town under his rule.  Soon the woman begins to have second thoughts after meeting young man (Joel McCrea) from her old hometown.  Hawks has a big following today and many consider him one of the greatest director's of all time but I'm really not sure I'd join such high praise.  I did find it rather strange that when people mention his work this title is often left out, which is too bad because I found this to be one of the most entertaining of his career even though he did take the picture over from William Wyler.  Some have called this LITTLE CAESAR set during the gold rush and that might be a fair saying but you could also mix in another Robinson picture, THE HATCHET MAN.  This film here is pulp entertainment from start to finish as we have three legends really giving it their all in a pretty good story that contains romance, action, drama, comedy and one masterfully directed sequence.  This sequence takes place as a vigilante group is holding a trial while walking through some mud.  The sound effects used here and the constant editing down towards the mud is priceless and will certainly remain in the viewers mind long after the film ends.  Robinson dives head first into his role and really delivers one of the finest performances of his career.  His scenes where the character goes mad or better yet, love struck, are priceless and really pack a nice little punch as he goes off the deep end.  The evilness Robinson brings to the role was not only creepy but it added to the entertainment value just because it will also put a smile on your face.  Hopkins is also terrific and manages to deliver a full performance full of all sorts of emotions.  Her character goes through various stages and the actress captures all of them perfectly.  Her and Robinson have wonderful chemistry and I was shocked to learn after the movie that the two hated working with one another on this film.  McCrea is also terrific and plays the naive and soft-spoken character wonderfully.  The supporting cast features the wonderful Walter Brennan, Frank Craven, Brian Donlevy, Harry Carey and Donald Meek.  The film's biggest problem is the ending, which really felt added on but I haven't been able to find anywhere that it was forced by the studio.  Why this film isn't better known is beyond me but there's enough packed in here for two movies so hopefully more people will check it out. 
 

Whole Town's Talking, The (1935)
 

John Ford
 

A timid, shy and all around weak store clerk (Edward G. Robinson) gets mistaken for a harden gangster (Robinson) but his new fame allows him to store writing a column in a newspaper about how gangster are weak without their guns.  Soon the gangster shows up wanting more than just a little help.  As a comedy this movie is a real masterpiece but as a drama, the final thirty-minutes or so really bring down a lot of the great moments.  While watching this Columbia movie you can't help but wonder if this was originally meant to be directed by Frank Capra as it has his screenwriters and the small town story certainly seems like something you'd get from a Capra and not someone like Ford.  To his credit, Ford does a great job with the comedy and really delivers one of the funniest movies of the 1930's.  The problem happens in the third act when it really turns to too much of a gangster film and the laughs are pretty much forgotten.  What holds both sides together is the terrific performance by Robinson.  The way he plays the timid clerk is just downright hilarious and this includes a masterfully acted interrogation sequence where Robinson is nearly brought to tears because he's so scared.  Seeing a tough guy like Robinson acting scared was just hilarious and one actually starts to feel sorry for the guy because it appears he's about to die.  Robinson is also great in his second role as the gangster as he's as tough as ever and does manage to come off quite demanding and threatening.  Jean Arthur is wonderful as well and adds many great comic scenes including her own interrogation where she keeps admitting to crimes that she has nothing to do with or even knows about.  Arthur Hohl, Arthur Byron, Wallace Ford and Donald Meek round out the supporting cast.  You can even see Joe Sawyer playing one of Robinson's goons.  Again, I didn't care for the final act of the film as the comedy starts to not happen but that doesn't take away from everything at the start of the movie.  Robinson has never gotten the credit he deserves as an actual actor, which is a real shame but this film allows for both sides of him to be highlighted and to great effect. 


 

I'd much rather hang out with Laurie 2009 than Laurie 1978.

Brutally funny review Joe.  I agreed with most of it.  As I said in the official thread, I really wish Zombie had taken the good moments of these two films and put them in an original movie.  I know Zombie has said neither of these films are remakes but they are whether he likes it or not.  He's already said his version of THE BLOB isn't going to be a remake because "he doesn't want that jello thing in it".  Then don't call it THE BLOB.

I think watching a tormented kid go to an insane asylum followed by his escape and brutal rampage was an interesting idea.  In fact, it was a great idea that sadly was wasted because it had the title HALLOWEEN.  I don't mind "remakes" because quite often they just feature a few similar "main goals" and a new story added on.  HALLOWEEN and H2 change everything, which isn't how it works.

I don't mind the upcoming A NIGHTMARE ON ELM ST. but don't turn the child molesting Freddy into a dream protector who enters kid's dreams to worn them that their bus driver is a pervert.  If you're going to remake THE EXORCIST, don't have the kid get possessed by the ant farm in the back yard.  With Myers, he is and will always be the "scary figure" who stalks.  The problem with the killer in HALLOWEEN and H2 is that it's not Myers.  As you said, Zombie can call him that but it's just a brutal killing machine.

I want EVERY film to be remade but there have been a few problems.  PSYCHO doing it scene for scene and HALLOWEEN going all out to destroy everything that was in the original. 

In Zombie's case, the poor writing has something to do with it and sadly, I'll probably subject myself to H2 again if a longer director's cut is released to DVD.  As much as I hated these two films (as well as 1000 CORPSES), I'll go see Zombie's THE BLOB but if the killer is a redneck farmer then I'm going to be rather pissed especially if he does nothing more than say the "F" word countless times. 


Jail Bait (1954)
 

Edward D. Wood, Jr.
 

What was director Wood to do after unleashing his classic GLEN OR GLENDA? onto the world?  Why to make a film noir with elements of Bogart's DARK PASSAGE and a touch of THE RAVEN.  In the film, a plastic surgeon (Herbert Rawlinson) must change the face of a gangster (Timothy Farrell) after his son becomes mixed up with him.  He learns that his son, who killed a cop, has already been killed by the gangster so revenge is on his mind.  On a technical level there's no question that this is the best made film by Wood.  The story, even if unoriginal, at least manages to be told without any major goofs and it flows from start to finish at a nice pace.  While this isn't a classic noir, what does make it watchable are the really bad performances and that oh-so-wacky dialogue by Wood.  You get other crazy items like a blackface sequence being lifted from YES SIR, MR. BONES!, a music score lifted from MESA OF LOST WOMEN and the fact that Rawlinson, in a role meant for Lugosi who turned it down after becoming ill, died the morning after his scenes were filmed.  The dialogue is completely crazy from start to finish but hey, this is one reason why Wood is so loved today.  The performances are really on another level of badness and that includes Steve Reeves and Lyle Talbot who spend most of the movie talking to one another in a room (which is re-used countless times throughout the movie).  Also on hand is Dolores Fuller turning in a pretty bad performance, which makes one happy she didn't have more screen time in GLEN OR GLENDA?.  Wood throws out all sorts of wackiness and that includes the final shot, which is clearly a nod to Billy Wilder's SUNSET BLVD.  In the end, if you're wanting classic noir you should check out TOUCH OF EVIL or OUT OF THE PAST.  If you want cheap, outrageous entertainment then this forgotten Wood picture should do the trick.
 

Tyson (2008)
 

James Toback
 

Wonderful documentary has no talking heads with the exception of the subject himself.  Tyson sits down for what's basically an interview of his life where he discusses his early days of getting beat up, to the rise of his career, his multiple falls and multiple rises.  Tyson speaks with that voice that doesn't seem to match his frightening body and perhaps that's part of the fascination people have always had for him.  If you hate him or love him or if you find him to be trash or a great anti-hero, this documentary will certainly show a side of Tyson that most have never seen.  I don't just mean the tears but the fact that it seems he actually knows how much he has messed up over the years and he's finally taking some responsibility for the many bad actions throughout his life.  It's incredibly entertaining hearing him discuss his hero Cus D'Amato and how his death effected him.  We get to see the Tyson battle from the streets to the heavyweight champion only to end up in prison on a rape charge.  There's the famous comeback and then the infamous fall after taking a bite out of Holyfield's ear.  No matter how many times Tyson has risen and fallen, there's always something interesting that will keep him in the public mind.  This documentary never takes sides and instead just gives Tyson the chance to speak his mind.  The movie goes by extremely fast and in the end I was personally moved by what Tyson said and I'm certainly looking at him in a different light.  In an interview director Toback said, that in a way, this was a confessional for Tyson and in many ways that is a true statement.  I don't believe a Tyson hater is going to walk away from this film loving him but I do think they'll walk away with a certain understanding of how Tyson became an animal, like LaMotta would say in RAGING BULL, only to try and rise up.
 

Little Fugitive (1953)
 

Morris Engel
 

This Oscar-nominated film was made for $30,000 by a group of people who felt Hollywood wasn't turning out proper films.  John Cassavetes gets credited with starting "independent" features but film historians say it really started here.  Francois Truffaut even added that without this film there would never have been the French New Wave.  This film tells the story of a young boy named Joey (Richie Andrusco) who is left home alone with his older brother when their mother is called away.  After a mean trick, Joey fears that he has shot is brother dead so he decides to run away from home and soon finds himself at Coney Island.  This is a pretty magical little film and yet it's fairly hard to explain why.  There's really not too much that happens here.  We see Joey going to Coney where he plays one game after another.  We see him eat watermelon, hot dogs, cotton candy and various other items he can shove into his mouth.  We then see them walk around the beach collecting bottles so that he can get the deposit money, which will earn him a horse ride.  That's pretty much it but the rawness in this film are unmatched by anything Hollywood was putting out and you can't help but really admire how much beauty is in this little gem.  The performances are all really raw but this is to be expected as Engel didn't want to use real actors.  Andrusco comes off very well as the lead and he's certainly charming enough to carry the film.  The cinematography by Engel was also somewhat of a first as he created a special camera that could sit on his chest and capture the action without a tripod.  This leads to a rather stunning look throughout the film that makes for some very memorable and at times haunting images.  I do think the film began to lose some steam as it went along but there's no denying that this is a very important little picture that needs to be scene by more film buffs. 
 

Private Screenings: Tony Curtis (1999)
 

Tony Barbon
 

Marvelous episode of the series has Robert Osborne sitting down with the legendary, if controversial Tony Curtis.  Curtis, as energetic as ever, talks the entire time telling one great story after another and he isn't scared to dish a little dirt.  Included on the dirt is him saying Kurt Douglas wasn't very friendly when it came to sharing courtesy with other actors.  Curtis also speaks openly about Monroe on SOME LIKE IT HOT and he even goes further by pointing fingers at people close to her who could have saved her.  We also get talk of his early days in New York where we hear about the first movie he remember seeing (a Rin Tin Tin serial) as well as his favorites at the time, which just happened to be the Universal horror movies.  Discussions of THE DEFIANT ONES, HOUDINI, TRAPEZE, SWEET SMELL OF SUCCESS and THE BOSTON STRANGLER, which he considers his favorite.  The entire fifty-minutes here are pure delight as Curtis never goes silent and is brutally honest in answering questions about his personal life including his troubled marriage to Janet Leigh.  Fans of the actor or this era of Hollywood will certainly want to check this interview out as it's certainly a gem.
 

Clues to Adventure (1949)
 

Entry in John Nesbitt's Passing Parade series shows us three different stories that all link to the Bill of Rights.  First off we hear how a popular nursery rhyme for children helped get King James II out of England.  Next up we learn that a small newspaper helped establish freedom of the press.  Finally, the story of the man in the iron mask shows why cruel and unusual punishment is not allowed.  Nesbitt's Passing Parade is one of the most entertaining series that pop up on Turner Classic Movies ever few weeks.  The films don't have the greatest production values as a lot of them lift scenes from other movies but what works so well are the actual stories.  As usual, I wasn't aware of any of the three stories being told here so my thrill of learning something new goes well with this series.  The way we get told these forgotten stories are a lot of fun and they manage to stay entertaining throughout the 9-minute running times. 
 

Duck Hunters' Paradise (1933)
 

Harold Austin
 

Documentary short from MGM takes us along as a husband and wife goes out to a lake in Sacramento Valley, CA to duck hunt.  This place is known as a hunter's paradise because of all the thousands and thousands of ducks that are constantly in easy shot.  If you are against animals being shot on screen then it's best to stay away from this short as countless ducks are shot.  With the warning out of the way, this is a pretty entertaining short, which features some great shots of the thousands of ducks but it also features some pretty good narration by Paul Girard Smith.  Smith actually reminded me of a future Smith, Pete, in the type of narration in order to get laughs.  I'm not sure if the two are related as I couldn't find anything on IMDB but there's no denying that their styles are similar.  The actual photography here is rather rough around the edges and it's clear that the majority of the film was shot silent but fans of the genre should find enough here to stay entertained for just under ten minutes. 
 

Hollywood Party (1937)
 

Roy Rowland
 

One hopes a real Hollywood party wasn't as boring as this mess of a short from MGM.  The main reason to tune in is the three-strip Technicolor, which was just starting out.  In the film Charley Chase and Elissa Landi are introducing various music acts and a few Hollywood A-listers with it all set to a Chinese theme.  The Chinese theme also means Chase slanting his eyes, wearing some funny facial hair and throwing around rather stereotypical slang.  The movie, no matter how you look at it, is a real embarrassment and one can't help but feel bad for Chase, a veteran of over 250 films, for having to appear in it as MGM certainly didn't do him any favors.  The biggest problem is that the film never knows what it wants to be.  It starts off appearing to just want to make fun of Chinese customs.  It then turns into a music and features some very bad songs.  It then tries to be a fashion show, which is fails at miserably even though we see some nearly naked women, which makes one wonder how this got passed by the Hayes Office.  Everything this film tries it fails at and the cameos by Joe E. Brown, Anna May Wong, Freddie Bartholomew, Joan Bennett and Clark Gable can't help. 

Neckin' Party, A (1937)
 

Lloyd French
 

Edgar Bergen and his dummy Charlie McCarthy are up to their old tricks in this Warner short.  This time out the duo travel to Bergen's hometown where a woman begins to flirt with Charlie and this doesn't sit too well with her crazy boyfriend who wants to hang the dummy by his neck.  This is a pretty bad short that I doubt even fans of the duo will enjoy.  They've always been hit and miss with me but this one here is without question the worst I've seen from them.  The biggest problem is that the short appears to be missing any type of actual story.  We have a beginning and an ending but it appears everything in the middle is just missing and in the end the entire film doesn't make much sense.  The jokes are pretty bland, the settings boring and there isn't a laugh to be had anywhere.  Puppet Elmer Mortimer also appears here and at least contains a little life to gets things moving. 

Word for the Greeks, A (1951)
 

Later entry in MGM's TravelTalks series with James A. FitzPatrick.  We visit Greece where we take short stops in Athens, Acropolis, Parthenon and the Island of Rhodes.  This is a pretty bland entry in the series because there really isn't too much for us to see here.  FitzPatrick's narration is as you'd expect but none of the things we see are overly interesting.  We see the various fruit markets downtown as well as the architectural styles that helped make the cities some of the most popular tourist spots.  The Technicolor print that was shown on Turner Classic Movies was pretty faded and worn out. 

Canoeman's Holiday (1956)
 

RKO/Sportscope short takes a look at the Loon Bay Lodge in St. Stephen, Canada.  We ride down river with George and Jean Wheelock as well as Scott and Elmo Wright as they tackle the white water.  These Sportscope shorts are always hit and miss with the majority of them, that I've seen at least, being misses.  This here is certainly one of the better entries I've seen but keep in mind that none of them have been exactly good.  What works here is some nice shots of the white water as there's obviously a camera in one of the boats following the couples down river.  These gets us close to the action and makes for some mild entertainment even though the actual cinematography isn't anything special.  This series always tries to be like other popular series from other studios be it Pete Smith or whoever.  This one here once again tries to work like a TravelTalks short but here we get boring narration and B&W footage.  If you have 9-minutes to kill you might want to give this a shot but only if, like me, you plan on watching every short TCM shows.

I Love My Mother-in-Law, But! (1948)
 

Dave O'Brien
 

A husband (Dave O'Brien) wants to like his mother-in-law but she makes that impossible as she is constantly spying on his, getting into the middle of fights with his wife and also putting false things into the wife's head.  This here was the third and final part of the trilogy that also included I LOVE MY HUSBAND, BUT! and I LOVE MY WIFE, BUT.  Having seen all three I can say that each of them is a winner and they prove how funny O'Brien could be not only in the acting department but also his writing.  His name probably doesn't ring too many bells today but show people his shorts and I'm sure they'll enjoy them.  He does a very good job here acting out all the "drama" brought on by the mother-in-law and Pete Smith does his typical good narration.  All of the scenes are pretty good with one dealing with a hanging picture stealing the film.  Anne O'Neal is good as the mommy-in-law.

Hot Dog (1930)
 

Zion Myers, Jules White
 

Another entry in MGM's "Dogville" shorts, which pretty much put dogs into the roles of humans.  How did they get the dogs to "act"?  By putting strings on them and jerking them around the set.  This film takes place at a popular hang out where a female dog is with her lover.  The husband then comes in and beats up the lover but the wife shoots and kills him.  A court battle follows.  I've seen around ten of these shorts and I must say each one just gets weirder and weirder.  On one hand, as a comedy, the film is a complete failure because there's not a single laugh to be found here.  I'm not sure how funny this series was back in the early 30s but today the films are rather painfully in how unfunny they are.  With that said, they're still quite entertaining because of how surreal and downright strange they are.  Seeing dogs being yanked around is something we'll never see again so these films have a morbid curiosity factor, which I'm guessing is one of the main reasons TCM keeps showing them.

Where Time Stands Still (1945)
 

TravelTalks entry takes s trip to Guatemala where we take a look at the local Indian tribes and how they live both past and present.  We see them growing or catching their own food, making fabrics and dying them with special berries that they also grow.  We also learn that when a young man wants to marry a woman he must leave some sticks outside her house.  If her dad accepts them then a marriage can take place.  This is another pleasant entry in the long-running series that once again shows us a time and place that can't be re-created.  On that level this film, and the series, remains entertaining.  The Technicolor certainly doesn't hurt nor does James A. FitzPatrick's nice narration. 
 

Buffalo Stockyards (1897)
 

Early Edison short features captures various horses being ridden to a local stockyard where they're to be sold.  That's pretty much all we get here but it's enough to take up a total of 21-seconds.  Once again, one must view these old films as just a history lesson and that's where the entertainment comes from.  While there's not too much going on here, at least we get to see various nice items from the past including the old carriages and some rather nice uniforms being worn by the people. 
 

Building a Harbor at San Pedro (1901)
 

Interesting Edison short shows (as the title suggests) a harbor being built.  The four-minute short shows a derrick, which was the biggest in the world at the time, doing its job in dropping large rocks into the water, which then causes a large spray of water to splash up on the workers.  This is a pretty good short as the sight of this water splashing up makes for a nice special effect and it's a wonder that some of the workers didn't get knocked off.  The biggest problem with the film is its actual running time as it gets pretty stale watching the same thing over and over for such a long period of time. 
 

Burglar's Slide for Life, The (1905)
 

Extremely ambitious Edison short has a burglar breaking into an apartment where he's eventually discovered by the owner and her friend.  The burglar goes out the window and begins to slide down the clothes line only to have a dog follow suit.  This is a fairly entertaining short, which looks like the work of Edwin S. Porter even though he's only credited as the producer here.  The film has an actual "story" to work with and it's mildly entertaining even if it doesn't get that big of laughs.  The trick photography of showing the burglar going from one floor to the next isn't all that impressive even for 1905 standards but it's decent enough.  The ending, with nearly everyone beating the bad guy, has a few charming moments. 
 

Burial of the 'Maine' Victims (1898)
 

War shorts were very popular in the early days of cinema and this Edison short benefits from a real life tragedy.  The film shows the burial of the men whose Navy ship exploded and sank on February 15, 1898.  We see nine different carriages going down a street, covered by the flag, and then proceeded by lines of people.  Once again, this early film has no real story but it does contain a part of history that can't be copied or re-filmed.  Fans of history are probably going to be the biggest fans of this film because of the story behind the deaths.  The history is enough to make anyone curious but the film also gives us a glimpse to how these things were done.
 

Burning of the Standard Oil Co.'s Tanks, Bayonne, N.J. (1900)
 

Edison short shows exactly what the title promises, which I'm sure was enough to draw in big lines.  The short runs just around 90-seconds and shows a street pretty much become overtaken by black smoke, which keeps rising in the background.  Watching this today one can't help but think of 9/11 and the various images we saw there.  The film keeps the camera set in one spot as it picks up the action of firemen going towards the blaze as well as others walking away.  The print quality makes it somewhat difficult to see too clearly what all is happening but it's another part of history that lives on thanks to the new format.