well crossovers are a necessity to good SQ but people who just dabble in it don't ever reap the benefits. Don't get coaxials for your fronts at all. Get components sets up front to do a couple things. One) having tweets that are seperate from the woofer allow the woofer to play better and also allow you to bring the stage higher by mounting the tweets out of the door panels and up on the dash. 2) components come with passive crossovers which will automatically seperate frequencies for you that suit the speakers best. Coaxials are ok for rear fill but for a good frontstage, components will do much better, handle more power, and have less distortion. Rear are really not that important unless you go for a 5.1 setup. I used to use rear fill until i added a few things up front and got a very full front stage. i will be adding a small rear fill by means of a 4in component setup thats run off the HU power. Obviously you can tell that rear fill to me is just filler. Unless you go 5.1, having rear fill can cause a problem if done wrong because it'll confuse the soundstages. never make one stage louder than the other, try to blend it so that is a seamless blend from front to rear.
If you want a set of good SQ components i can give you an email for a CDT Audio dealer. He gives good deals and CDT is on the same plane as Focal. Also if you get a component set, i would suggest an LP-1 tweet remote. This acts like a volume knob just for the tweets, capable of cutting it by -10db so you have the ability to change the level of the tweets to match your volume ensuring that your highs won't blast your eardrums to puddy.
As far as db you have the right idea. The higher db the more efficient the speakers will be with the power and the louder they can get.
As far as crossing over, you probably won't get too deep into it unless you get a nice HU like Eclipse or Alpine high end models but a crossover point allows the speakers to perform in the "sweet" spots. Like someone else mentioned speakers can't handle a full spectrum so you need to be able to seperate what goes where. For me i use the crossover on my Eclipse 8443 to seperate the frequencies. Since i cross it at the HU, my RCAs are set to high, mid and lows instead of front, rear and sub. On my crossover it has highs, high/mid, low/mid, and lows.
Crossover points will depend much on what type of speakers you have. For me i have been able to cross my highs(tweets) at 3.15khz on a 18db scale. My mid RCA is mid/high crossed at 2.5khz on 24db, and mid/low crossed at 160hz on 12db scale. The lows(subs) is set to 80hz, 12db scale. When i mention the db scale with the crossover point, this displays the cutoff slope. A crossover doesn't cut a frequency at the selected frequency it slowly cutoffs of that frequency. I can't remember the equation but basically what i'm saying is that 80hz with 12db slope is slowly after the 80hz frequency its slowly cutoff from the sound meaning say by 200hz, the 80hz frequency is non-audible. If the slope was on a sharper one say 18db that say at 160hz, the 80hz is not audible. On an even sharper 24db slope you can figure it out yourself.
Crossovers are something that depend on you and your speakers. They take a while to use properly because say you have a crossover feature and an EQ feature on the HU, any change on the EQ may effect the crossover and the sound and any change on the crossover may effect the sound of the EQ, so you'll be flipping between both of these to find the right sound.