I'm starting to think that maybe it is a Paul Giamanti thing. I hated the PotA remake, and I couldn't stand Shoot 'Em Up, Lady in the Water, or Robots either.
I have yet to see Sideways, and that may be that man's last hope for me. I think he is a great actor, but I question his choice of films.
I suppose I am naturally predisposed to disliking remakes just as a general rule, but your take, while interesting, doesn't necessarily line up with me because, in Burton's own parlance, it was a 're-imagining'. One that didn't have nearly the gravitas of the original's twist ending.