Swamp Zombies - College students, a park ranger and a hermit join forces to fight the titular ghouls in this low budget zombiefest. Lots of undead ass-kicking and gratuituous busty babe nudity ensue. Decent of its type, but overlong. Where's Swamp Thing when ya need him?
** out of ****
Splatometer rating: **1/2 out of ****
Zombie Doom - Gore galore from the infamous Andreas Schnass. Three men arrive on an island and run afoul of the villainous Karl the Butcher and his Infantry of Doom. Meanwhile Karl's resident mad scientist is raising an army of the living dead. Luckily for the world two ninjas show up to monkey wrench the works! Pretty bad, but worth a look for the over the top splatter, including a four-seater guillotine and a nasty hook up the ass/spinal cord ripping! The dubbing is atrocious which makes for an uber-cheesy experience. Caveat: for a flick titled
Zombie Doom, there's relatively little undead action! AKA
Violent Shit III.
*1/2 out of ****
Splatometer rating: **** out of ****
Zombie '90: Extreme Pestilence - More blood and guts from splatmeister Andreas Schnass has two scientists trying to stop an outbreak of the living dead. Wall to wall spatter, most of which is pretty goofy in its execution. If you've ever wanted to see an infant (don't worry, it's just a doll!) ripped in two, give this a spin. The horrible dubbing provides some unintentional laughs.
* out of ****
Splatometer rating: ***1/2 out of ****
Living Dead Lock-Up - A convict learns that the prison to which he's been assigned has a nasty secret. Turns out that a former warden had a bad track record with keeping inmates alive and they're back from the grave, hungry for human flesh! A good try, but muddled and hampered to the point of distraction by its microbudget.
*1/2 out of ****
Splatometer rating: ** out of ****
Dead Girl Walking - Japanese short about a young girl who dies of a heart attack though her body remains animate. Unfortunately that doesn't keep her from rotting! Appalled, her family tries to destroy her but she runs away and ends up a dancing sideshow freak. Interesting premise spoiled somewhat by a silly ending.
**1/2 out of ****
Splatometer rating: **1/2 out of ****
Psychomania - Solid Euroshocker has the leader of a motorcyle gang using a supernatural ritual to come back from the dead as a murderous and unstoppable zombie. Can he convince his buddies to join him in the
afterlife? Can the cops put a stop to his killing spree?
*** out of ****
Splatometer rating: zero out of ****
Brain Blockers - A college professor experiments on co-eds with his new serum, turning them into flesh-eating ghouls. Ingratiating horror comedy is more entertaining than it has any right to be, thanks to an attractive and game cast. I'd marry the hellacute female lead. Yum, yum, yummity-yum!
**1/2 out of ****
Splatometer rating: ** out of ****
Deadline - Dutch short follows a news crew as they investigate mysterious goings-on at a video game company, unaware that the place has been overrun with hungry zombies! And you thought mosquitos could only give you malaria and yellow fever!
*** out of ****
Splatometer rating: *** out of ****
Today's tally:
Amunition expended: 593,406,293 rounds
Blood spilled: 9,498 gallons
Intestines eaten: 592 miles worth
Eyes gouged: 2
Bisectings: 3
Noses lopped off: 1
Beheadings: lost count
Impalings: lost count
Nasty things done with hooks: 2
Redneck zombies: 2
Unlucky co-eds: 7
Unlucky infants: 2
Evil federal agents: 2
Ass-kicking park rangers: 1
Ass-kicking ninjas: 2
Boris Karloff wannabees: 1
Hitler mustaches: 1
Boobs on display: 
Gratuitous lesbian kisses: 2
Blowjobs that end badly: 1
Dancing dead girls: 1
Giant supernatural frogs: 1
Exploding hamsters: 1
Irradiated mosquitos: ???
Stupid people killed: at least 8
Lesson for the day: if zombies are after you, don't just fucking stand there, RUN AWAY!!!