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For me, scary is that incredibly tense feeling you get when the camera tracks down to the basement at the end of The Blair Witch Project, or the seance scene in The Changeling. Moments that make you so tense you are gripping your seat and squirming in your chair.
Cheap thrills that make you jump when someone goes "boo" are, to me, just reactionary impulses. There is little real fear or dread there. You could put a similar scene in When Harry Met Sally and it would be just as effective. I'll jump with the rest or 'em, but I'll feel cheap about it afterward. :b
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