Your favorite SEINFELD line

#91

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3/27/03 at 7:15am

MickeS
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This one is from an episode that was on last night, "The fire". It's the one where George is at the birthday party of his girlfriend's son, and he sees smoke in the kitchen, runs out, pushing women, children and an old woman with a walker out of his way so he can get out first.

After he tries to explain away his behavior, trying to make himself out as a hero, one of the firemen asks him "How can you live with yourself?"

George's response, in his tiniest most pathetic little voice is so good: "It's not easy."

I use the phrase every once in a while myself.

/Mike

#92

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3/27/03 at 10:39am

Chad Ellinger
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Post Count: 270

Another great Implant quote:

Timmy: "Did you just double-dip that chip?"
George: "Excuse me?"
Timmy: "You double-dipped the chip."
George: "Double-dipped? What are you talking about?"
Timmy: "You dipped the chip, you took a bite, and you dipped again."

My Movie Collection

#93

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3/27/03 at 12:05pm

Steve_Tk
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George and Kramer are hilarious, but I would hate to have friend's like them.

I couldn't deal with someone always mooching in my house and someone that is constantly so whiney and pathetic.

But again, extremely funny to watch.

#94

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3/27/03 at 12:10pm

Jeremiah
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I can't believe I forgot all about the Double Dip scene since it is one of my favorite scenes.

"Well, Timmy, I don't dip that way"

I have seen Larry David in action, and that man is an animal, and he has to be stopped.

#95

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3/27/03 at 12:44pm

Vin
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There are so many incredibly funny lines, I could see this thread going on indefinitely.....anyway, here's one more!

JERRY: "Mom, I know this may be hard for you to understand but I'm sure there are many people who do not like me."

JERRY'S MOM: "(GASP) Jerry, don't say that!"

JERRY: "It's true."

JERRY'S MOM: "No it isn't, it's not true....you're a wonderful, wonderful boy. Everybody likes you, it's impossible not to like you, impossible.....Morty?"

MORTY: "Maybe some people don't like him, I could see that."

JERRY'S MOM: "Kramer?"

KRAMER: "Yeah, I like 'em."

#96

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3/27/03 at 12:49pm

Jeremy Stockwell
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Location: Indiana
Post Count: 608

From "The Bubble Boy"

(Susan, George, and the Bubble Boy are all playing Trivial Pursuit)

DONALD: Ok, History. This is for the game. (Taunts George) How ya doin' over there? Not too good!

GEORGE: All right bubble boy. Let's just play.. (Picks up one of the cards, and reads it) "Who invaded Spain in the 8th century?"

DONALD: That's a joke. The Moors.

GEORGE: Oh, Nnoooo, I'm so sorry. It's the Moops! The correct answer is: The Moops.

DONALD: Moops? Let me see that. (Takes the card from George) That's not Moops, you Jerk! It's Moors. It's a misprint.

GEORGE: I'm sorry, the card says Moops.

DONALD: (Shouting) It doesn't matter! It's the Moors. There's no Moops.

GEORGE: It's Moops.

DONALD: Moors!

GEORGE: Moops!

DONALD: Moors!

Had to share another one.

JKS

You brought two too many.

#97

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3/27/03 at 1:19pm

Rex Bachmann
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Vin wrote (post #95):

Quote:

JERRY'S MOM: "No it isn't, it's not true....you're a wonderful, wonderful boy. Everybody likes you, it's impossible not to like you, impossible.....Morty?"

Yes, this is repeated across several episodes in the form: "How could anybody not like him?"

She says, "He's/You're a wonderful boy. How could anybody not like him/you" while watching Jerry's pilot episode on tv in "The Pilot" (part 2), and at least once (I think) during the two-parter "The Ticket"/"The Wallet". She may also say this in the two-part episode "The Cadillac". (Also funny is when Morty occasionally retorts, "I could see how someone might not like 'im.")

"Delenda est . . . . "

#98

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3/27/03 at 2:42pm

Jeff Pug
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Joined: January 2001
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A george divided against himself cannot stand

WORLDS ARE COLLIDING!!!!!!!!

GEORGE IS GETTING UPSET!!!!!!

\"the jury is still out on ...science\" GOB Bluth

#99

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3/27/03 at 6:30pm

WayneG
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Joined: October 2002
Post Count: 237

KRAMER: I'm flipping. I'm flopping.

and

KRAMER: I'm out there and I'm lovin' it.

#100

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3/27/03 at 6:35pm

WayneG
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Joined: October 2002
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GEORGE: Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?

#101

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3/27/03 at 7:20pm

Jim Spencer
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She had man hands. The hands of a man on the body of a woman. It's like something out of Greek Mythology.

My DVDs

#102

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3/28/03 at 8:57am

MickeS
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This is a great exchange from when Kramer tried to convince Jerry to commit mail fraud to get a new VCR (I think that's what it was?) because his was broken:

Kramer: It's a write-off for them.

Jerry: How is it a write-off?

Kramer: They just write it off.

Jerry: You don't even know what a write-off is.

Kramer: Do you?

Jerry: No, I don't.

Kramer: But they do, and they're the ones writing it off.

/Mike

#103

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3/28/03 at 1:15pm

Dave Morton
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Here's a couple,

Kramer to Jerry ; "You, Jerry, are an anti-dentite"

---------------------------------------

Kramer : Who's ready for fun?
George : I am.
Kramer : Do you really mean it or are you just saying it?
George : I'm just saying it.

------ Dave ------
------------------
MY HT

New Family Addition

#104

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3/28/03 at 1:19pm

Brian Perry
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The "double dip" scene was hilarious -- I like when Timmy says, "you might as well put your whole head in the bowl!"

#105

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3/28/03 at 1:32pm

MickeS
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Actually I think the quote is:

Kramer: Who wants to have some FUN??

Jerry & George: I do...

Are you just SAYING you want to have some fun, or do you REALLY want to have some fun??

Jerry: I really want to have some fun.

George: I'm just saying I want to have some fun.

/Mike

#106

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3/28/03 at 3:13pm

Evan Case
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Location: Catasauqua, PA
Post Count: 1,104

That "Who wants to have some FUN?" exchange has been my computer start-up sound going on 7-8 years now. Classic.

I still use Puddy's "We're the Devils! The Devils!!!" on a semi-regular basis (as a Flyers fan, I'm glad to see that Seinfeld nailed the barely coherent nature of Devils' supporters

)

Another one:
Jerry: "Kramer, you threw a banana peel at a monkey???"
Kramer: "Well he started it!"

I can't remember any specific lines from the episode, but the one where Kramer's convinced that there's a race of mutant pig-men being grown in a hospital has a ton of great ones.

Evan

" " - Buster Keaton
S&S (1992 & 2002), The 1930s : Finished! S&S Club : 307 seen (Most Recent: Jeanne Dielman)
AFI Challenge Stars: 44 left, Songs: 11 left, Passions: 6 left, Cheers: 5 left, Quotes: 3 left, Heroes/Villains: 1 left, Top Tens: 1 left; Laughs, Thrills, Movie...

#107

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3/28/03 at 3:39pm

Jeremiah
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"I, am breaking up, with you."

Also, "But I got hand."(George)......"And you're gonna need it."(Girlfriend)

"Are those MY socks?! I think those are MY socks!"

I have seen Larry David in action, and that man is an animal, and he has to be stopped.

#108

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3/28/03 at 3:42pm

Jeremiah
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"You better be careful on those rocks tomorrow buddy, and you ain't gettin no sandwiches!"

Tony-"Step off George!"
George-"Oh, oh Tony."

I have seen Larry David in action, and that man is an animal, and he has to be stopped.

#109

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3/28/03 at 4:26pm

PaulBoud
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Joined: March 2002
Post Count: 45

You're a bad man Jerry, a very bad man!!

My favorite visual is of George riding up the stairs on the motorized seat because everyone thought he was handicapped. Oh man that's some funny stuff.

#110

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3/28/03 at 4:53pm

Malcolm R
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Joined: February 2002
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Quote:

She had man hands. The hands of a man on the body of a woman. It's like something out of Greek Mythology.

Man hands...

Loved that ep!

Uncle Joe: I'll never marry you, Selma Plout! You may as well take off that wedding dress and put it back in your Hopeless Chest!

--Petticoat Junction--

#111

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3/28/03 at 4:55pm

Mario Bartel
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Here are a couple of weird Seinfeld coincidences:

The other day a friend related an incredible story via email, to which I replied, "I am speechless. I am without speech." The next day, that episode was on!

This morning, a co-worker related how the other day she got a call from her son's school; he had fallen, bumped his head, and needed to be brought home. But before leaving to retrieve her son, she stopped to eat a Power Bar, like Elaine with the ju-jubes at the movie theater. This afternoon, that epidsode was on!

Mario
Beware the sting of the evil orange plastic ball

#112

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3/28/03 at 5:18pm

Joel C
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Get OUT!!!!! [shove]

Joel
woemcats@hotmail.com
"Why I laugh?"

#113

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3/28/03 at 5:24pm

JeremySt
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Location: Seattle
Post Count: 1,738

George calls Jerry

jerry: Hello?

george: (sounding flustered) Jerry! Jerry! You got over to Kramers and wake up the Japanese people! They were up all night drinking saki in the hot tub! They gotta get down here to meet the tv people! Jerry!

jerry: Uncle Leo?

George: JERRY!!!!! starts hitting phone receiver on the booth.

#114

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3/28/03 at 5:53pm

Carl Johnson
Carl III
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Location: Indianapolis, IN
Post Count: 1,837

I'm not much of a Seinfeld fan (had to double check the thread title just to make sure i spelled his name right) but one episode that will stick in my mind forever is the one where George asked the woman he was trying to talk into being his girlfriend for some Menage à Trois. I didn't even see the episode from the beginning but it was clear that someone had misinformed George as to the true meaning of the term

#115

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3/28/03 at 7:42pm

Rex Bachmann
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Evan Case wrote (post #106):

Quote:

I can't remember any specific lines from the episode, but the one where Kramer's convinced that there's a race of mutant pig-men being grown in a hospital has a ton of great ones.

"The Bris"

"Look at that, Elaine! He circumcized my finger. The mohel circumcized my finger!!!"

George: "And he WASN'T a 'pigman', was he?"
Kramer (snorting and screeching): "Nope! Just a pink-skinned little mental patient."

Jeremiah wrote (post #107):

Quote:

"But I got hand." (George)......"And you're gonna need it."(Girlfriend)

George: "You can't break up with me. I've got hand!"
girlfriend: "And, yooou're gonna need it!"

"The Pez Dispenser"

Carl Johnson wrote (post #114):

Quote:

. . . one episode that will stick in my mind forever is the one where George asked the woman he was trying to talk into being his girlfriend for some Menage à Trois. I didn't even see the episode from the beginning but it was clear that someone had misinformed George as to the true meaning of the term

"The Label Maker"

Well, the idea there was that, on Jerry's advice, George proposes the ménage à trois so that the woman---she's already George's girlfriend---will dump him and take back the look-alike male roommate, Scott, that he has already successfully convinced her to get rid of, because he can't stand the fact that the burden of the relationship will now fall on him, George. George never expected her---much less the male roommate---to take him up on it.

Dave Morton wrote (post #103):

Quote:

Kramer to Jerry ; "You, Jerry, are an anti-dentite"

"The Yada Yada"

(approximate)

Jerry: "I think he [dentist Tim Whatley] converted [to Judaism] just for the jokes!"
Priest(?) that Jerry is consulting: "And this offends you as a Jewish person."
Jerry: "No, it offends me as a comedian!"

"Delenda est . . . . "

#116

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3/28/03 at 8:08pm

Rex Bachmann
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Ooops! Those last lines come, instead, from episode #164 "The Strike".

"Delenda est . . . . "

#117

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3/28/03 at 8:25pm

Scott D S
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Post Count: 591

Quote:

George: "And he WASN'T a 'pigman', was he?"

Also with the pigman:

George: "Let's go. I'm doubleparked." (Or something like that)
Kramer: "Make sure you have room for the pigman."
George: "The pigman can take the bus."
Kramer: "But if the pigman had a car, he'd give you a ride."
George: "How do you know? Maybe the pigman has a two-seater."
Kramer: "Be realistic, George." (Then Kramer gives a look to Jerry and shrugs off George, as if to say "That George, what an idiot!")

#118

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3/29/03 at 12:54am

Rex Bachmann
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Post Count: 1,920

Quote:

Ooops! Those last lines come, instead, from episode #164 "The Strike".

Ooops! I was right the first time! They're from "The Yada Yada", episode #153.

Carl Johnson wrote (post #114):

Quote:

. . . one episode that will stick in my mind forever is the one where George asked the woman he was trying to talk into being his girlfriend for some Menage à Trois. I didn't even see the episode from the beginning but it was clear that someone had misinformed George as to the true meaning of the term

"The Label Maker"

In review, it seems another episode, "The Switch" (#97), also involves George and a ménage à trois with his bulimic(?) girlfriend. I don't personally remember this thread, so I cannot comment on it. Maybe that's the one you are referring to.

Others:

"I think it moved." ("The Note" (#18))

"My boys can swim!" ("The Fix-Up" (#33))

Can't remember the exact wording:

"It's like my brain is fighting it out with my penis for control." ("The Nose Job" (#26))

"I don't want your boys down there. Your boys should stay in their [neighborhood???]" ("The Implant"???)

"KRAMER! Wh-wh-what is that?!? . . . Could it be . . .? Is it . . .? IT IS!!! Poppie PEED ON MY SOFA!!!" ("The Couch" (#91))

"We will annex Poland by the spring at all cost, and our stock will rise HIGH!" ("The Gymnast" (#92))

Since this thread is clearly a popular success, I will try out another couple of (more demanding) Seinfeld threads within a few days.

"Delenda est . . . . "

#119

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3/29/03 at 5:53am

Ty Zucker
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Joined: December 1999
Post Count: 141

"This is the Urban Sombrero. I put it on the cover of our last catalog."
"The horror! The horror!"
- Elaine and Mr. Peterman, in "The Chicken Roaster"

Later in the same episode Elaine is wearing an Urban Sombrero and Jerry says: "Now who's the bozo?"
Elaine points at herself.

#120

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3/29/03 at 7:30am

Don Black
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Joined: December 1998
Post Count: 1,485

Kramer: We're right on this guy like stink on a monkey!

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