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Your favorite SEINFELD line

#1
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I'm boooored. So, here's an idea for a topic that's extra light and fluffy (and, hopefully, fun). I haven't found this in a search of the tv-section, so I'll presume it hasn't been done before (although I can't imagine why not).

My favorite sitcom is Seinfeld, natch. One of its comedic strengths was its use of catchwords and phrases that captured in language the everyday irony of life or, sometimes, just skillfully euphemized a forbidden topic ("yada yada", "sponge-worthy", "master of one's domain", etc.).

Here I'd like to engage all fans of the show to name their favorite Seinfeld line.

Most of these probably shouldn't need a lot of background or exposition to them, if yours needs some, please give it in brief form. If you feel you need to include surrounding dialog, please highlight the line in question. At the risk of stealing someone's thunder, I give an example.

Quote:
"He took it out."
"'It'?"
"It."
"'Out'?"
"Out."
. . . . .
"How can that be?"
"Ohhhhh, it be."

("The Stand-In")

This is an example that's marginal. It could've included just the line itself, but I went ahead and included some of the subsequent dialog as well. Fans of the show won't---or shouldn't---need further explanation or details than what's here.

Please identify the episode from which your line is drawn. To help yourself do this, I suggest searching with key word relevant to the episode at either the S.O.B. (i.e., Steven O'Brien's) Seinfeld episode guide page or at the tvtome.com guide to Seinfeld.

To start this off on the right foot, my own all-time favorite Seinfeld line (delivered with the characteristic Seinfeld whine):

"Why would a person from a pony-country move to a NON-pony country?"

("The Pony Remark")

'Nuff said?

guideline: Finally, please, given the (assumed) popularity of this topic, only ONE LINE per customer. Give others a chance. If your line has been taken, you may comment on it and choose another one---ONE!---that hasn't yet been used. If, after a couple of days, the participation in the thread hasn't gone through the roof and you have a second line you'd like to throw in, THEN and ONLY THEN come back with it, in fairness to others.
"Delenda est . . . . "
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#2
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I'll grab one of the most obvious lines, only because I used it earlier today: "No soup for you!" (from The Soup Nazi). I am sorely tempted to use a line from The Contest, but as I'm only allowed one, I'll stick with "No soup for you!"
-Steve
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#3
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"I'm out!"

The Contest
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#4
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"Lemme finish my breakfast before I watch them slice this fat bastard up"
- Jerry as he covers his face with a coffee cup

("The Junior Mint")

"Oh I can hold my breath for a long, long time!"

http://www.dvdprofiler.com/mycollect...s=TromaFiend02

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#5
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"Was it a Titleist?"

(from The Marine Biologist)
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#6
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"Maybe the dingo ate your baby."

And you believe, at heart, everyone's a killer...
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#7
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"Delores!"

from The Junior Mint
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#8
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"Hands off Jimmy, dont touch Jimmy. Let GOOO of Jimmy".
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#9
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One quote, this is not an easy task, however...

Setting: Kramer calling Jerry from a payphone because he is lost in Downtown NYC

Jerry "What street are you on?"
Kramer "I'm on First and First. How can the same street intersect with itself? I must be at the nexus of the universe!"

The Maid


Great Poll idea

DarrenH

darren

My Home Theatre Page

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#10
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"That's a Shame"
I use this one at least every day.

 "Cock your hat - angles are attitudes. "
- Frank Sinatra 

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#11
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"Hello, JERRY."

"Hello, NEWMAN."

"No one would know us there."

-Far From Heaven- (2002)

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#12
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Quote:
"...and you want to be my latex salesman."

This line is from the end of part 1 of "The Boyfried" and is spoken by Jerry to George while the latter gentleman is lying on the floor with his pants around his ankles.

Brad

We apologise for the unnecessary truncation and lack of formatting control in the signature. Those responsible should be sacked.

Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti...

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#13
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"I'm not a lesbian. I hate men, but I'm not a lesbian."

- Elaine

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#14
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One that gets me everytime is in, I believe it was "The Mimbo" Where George and Kramer go rock climbing with the Dan Cortese Character and he fall. Then later in Jerry's apartment. Forgive any inexactness

Kramer: Well, that all depends on what you mean by.."accident"

Elaine: Did anything happen to his face.

George: Well when he fell, his face kind of hit..aaaaa...Kramer

Kramer: (no hesitation) Rock!

George: yeah

And then earlier in that episode

Kramer: You loovvvveeee him


STOP HIM! He's supposed to die!
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#15
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When somebody has B.O., the "O" usually stays with the "B". Once the "B" leaves, the "O" goes with it. - Jerry in The Smelly Car.

«2000 Film List º 2001 Film List º 2002 Film List º 2003 Film List º 2004 Film List » Best of 2001 º 2002 º 2003 YMDb Top 20

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#16
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George: You're giving me the 'it's not you it's me' routine. I invented 'it's not you it's me'. Nobody tells me it's not them it's me. If it's anybody, it's me.
Girlfriend: Alright, George, it's you.
George: You're damn right it's me.
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#17
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That was one magic lougi.
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#18
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"It was like a full body dry heave...set to music."

And you believe, at heart, everyone's a killer...
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#19
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Tim, that line is great. Man, I want to put a couple but.....

"You don't understand, there was shrinkage."- The Hamptons
I have seen Larry David in action, and that man is an animal, and he has to be stopped.
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#20
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Jerry: You feel the need to use a lot of obscenities at the dentist's office?
Kramer: Hehe, when they pull that needle out, I let the expletives fly!

- The Jimmy (probably the best episode)

The way Michael Richards said that line was comic gold, I laugh at it every time without fail.

Firefox
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#21
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"Care to make it interesting?" -- Kramer, "The Contest"
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#22
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"Nures, give me a SHTICKLE (sp) of flouride"

Dentist Whatley

Takin it easy....

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#23
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"Not that there's anything wrong with that!"

~ The Outing
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#24
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"But I don't want to be a Pirate!!"

-- The Puffy Shirt

Whenever the laws of any state are broken, a duly authorized organization swings into action. It may be the called the State Police, State Troopers, Militia, the Rangers, or the Highway Patrol THE CITIZENS AUXILIARY POLICE!!! These are the stories of the men whose training, skill, and courage,...

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#25
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Stephanie T, George had that line. The best set up for a comedy episode ever. "You know....I was alone...." "Glamour?"

This is hard because alot of Seinfeld's humor is visual. Case in point, my favorite isn't so much the line, but the reaction to it.

From "The Hamptons" after Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer see George's girlfriend topless, the three guys are commenting on how great of a weekend it is (Kramer just came back with his stolen lobsters) and he blurts out "I saw Jane topless," after Jerry and Elaine agree not to mention it, Kramer spills the beans. The look on George's face is hilarious, and Jerry's reaction is pricelss.

Chris
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#26
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"I could be in sports, I like sports. Maybe a Manager for a baseball team."
"That might be kinda hard to get"
"Oh, well maybe an announcer. I'd be good at that. You know how I always say those things during the games"
"Well yeh, but...they usually give those jobs to....people in broadcasting"
"Well that's really not fair"

"George is in very big trouble!"

"I think it moved"

It's hard to find a single line. Usually every skit is great.

Ok, why is this show still not out on DVD?
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#27
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Steve_Tk wrote (post #26):

Quote:
Ok, why is this show still not out on DVD?

There's been a lot of speculation about that in these forums and elsewhere. I'll say this and then we should let the subject drop in this thread:

a) Because the production company and the distributor (Columbia Tri-Star Television?) are still making plenty of dough off of the syndication of the show.
b) Because Warner Bros. (AOL Time Warner---or whatever it is this week) now owns the production company (Castle Rock) and it may be waiting for any homevideo rights that had been assigned on the show to Columbia Tri-Star before Warner acquired Castle Rock (which came to it, I believe, through the merger with/acquisition of Turner Broadcasting) to expire so that it can have the mountain of money that's going to be made off of the homevideo sales of this program all to itself.

Just speculation, of course. But enough about that here! Okay?


Quote:
It's hard to find a single line.


Very true, but you may have stolen someone else's thunder. Bad move!


By the way, this thread needn't be just a "poll". You can always discuss the comic situations or the characters' personalities represented in your or others' favorite lines. I just thought that some of the greatest quotes from the show are the most hilarious because those are the ones that are hilarious even out of context.
"Delenda est . . . . "
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#28
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Quote:
[...]

Kramer: "Yeah, then everybody is screaming because the driver, he's passed out because of all the commotion. The bus is out of control! So I grab him by the collar, I take him out of the seat, I get behind the wheel... Now I'm driving the bus!"

George: "You're Batman."

Kramer: "Yeah, I am Batman. Then the mugger, he comes to and he starts choking me. So, I'm fighting him off with one hand and I kept driving the bus with the other. Then I managed to open up the door and I kicked him out the door with my foot at the next stop."
George: "You kept making all the stops?"
Kramer: "Well, people kept ringing the bell!"

[...]


The "You're Batman" line had me already roaring with laughter, at the end of the dialouge I must have passed out. One of the funniest moments (of countless funny ones) in Seinfeld.
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#29
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Quote:
a) Because the production company and the distributor (Columbia Tri-Star Television?) are still making plenty of dough off of the syndication of the show.

I've never understood this reasoning. Does anybody know if there is hard evidence that a DVD release hurts the viewership, ratings, or sponsorship of a show in syndication? Has anyone seen any stats on "Friends" for example?

Oh well, what a great idea for a thread.

"Scerenity now!"

Peace,

DM
"We all end up dead, the question is how and why."
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#30
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GEORGE: Kramer goes to a fantasy camp. His whole life is a fantasy camp. People should plunk down two-thousand dollars to live like him for a week. Do nothing, fall ass-backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors, and have sex without dating. That's a fantasy camp!



One of my favorites of all-time. That and the buck naked comment.
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